DEAR ABBY: I'm 19, and last month I moved in with my boyfriend of five years. Ever since we got settled in our new home, he has invited his friends over on a daily basis. It's not just one or two, Abby; he has six to nine people stopping by every day to hang out, watch movies and even eat dinner with us.
I have tried expressing to him that I'd like to be asked before these people are invited. He'll comply occasionally, but most of the time I come home and find three people lounging in our living room like they own the place. His response when I get upset is, "I pay half the rent. Can't I have my friends over?"
There are nights when I want to come home, put my feet up, and read a book in peace and quiet, or better yet, spend time just with him. How can I communicate this without making him defensive? -- CROWDED OUT IN MINNESOTA
DEAR CROWDED: There is a secret to successful cohabitation. It's called compromise. Consideration for the other person's feelings is also helpful. Before inviting friends to come and hang out, or share a meal, your boyfriend should call and ask if that's OK with you. That's what partners do to keep peace under their roof. Please clip this and show it to your boyfriend. It's not a question of all or nothing; it's simply common courtesy.