DEAR ABBY: Because your column is like a huge community billboard, I thought I'd ask you to get this message out. Please remind women that when they schedule themselves for a mammogram, they should schedule their husbands for a prostate exam and PSA test.

There's an abundance of advertising about breast exams, yearly checkups and women's health centers, but little is seen about the same thing for men. Prostate cancer is a serious problem if it's not detected before the symptoms show up; by then it's already spreading outside the prostate. You know that men put off medical visits more often than women, so if you could get women involved in our health we might be around a lot longer.

As a prostate cancer survivor, I know from personal experience that early-stage prostate cancer has no symptoms and, having been cancer-free for the past six years, I am living proof that early prostate cancer can be cured. -- ALIVE AND KICKIN' IN KNOXVILLE, TENN.

DEAR ALIVE AND KICKIN': You have written an important letter. Many men, and women too, will appreciate your timely reminder. My mother was once asked what she thought was the most important ingredient for a lasting marriage. Her response: "A husband who lasts." Ladies, if you want your husband to last, improve the odds by making an appointment with his doctor every year.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 19-year-old young man who is writing you from a jail cell. None of my crimes were violent. They mainly consisted of theft and drugs. I've had a bad drug problem ever since my best friend overdosed in my hotel room. I did drugs before then, but not as much as afterward.

One thing led to another, and soon I found myself behind the wheel of other people's cars and using other people's credit cards.

I have been locked up for three months now, and looking back, I can't believe the life I was living. Is there still a chance I can turn my life into a success when I'm released? And what do you recommend I do to stay sober and lead a happy life? -- TOUGH LUCK IN CHATTANOOGA

DEAR TOUGH LUCK: You can still achieve success, but it will be harder. The first thing you must do is recognize that your situation had less to do with tough luck than a series of poor choices. Now that you are sober and thinking straight, it's time to start planning a different life when you are released.

Some positive steps to take: Join a 12-step support group; people with problems who have emotional support accomplish more than they can on their own. Understand that you will have to forgo relationships with people who use drugs and steal. Complete your education.

It won't be easy, but if you do all of the above, you'll no longer be the same person you are today, and you will lead a happier life with fewer problems.

CONFIDENTIAL TO "CAN'T DECIDE IN MISSOURI": Many colleges and universities offer career counseling and aptitude testing to help people choose a career. Of this I am certain: If you choose a job that you love, you'll never have to "work" a day in your life.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby -- Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included in the price.)

DEAR READERS: Believe it or not, I'm still getting mail regarding the letters I printed about hospital gowns. Some of them gave me a chuckle, and I thought I'd share them with you. So pour yourselves a cup of coffee or tea, sit back, and as they say, "Bottoms up!"

DEAR ABBY: Your column about hospital gowns reminded me of an item that appeared in the Milwaukee Journal Green Sheet years ago.

"Did you know that hospital gowns come in three sizes?

"Short, shorter, and don't bend over!"

-- A. BEYERSDORF, MILWAUKEE

DEAR A.: No, but that sounds like good advice to me.

DEAR ABBY: After reading the letters about hospital gowns, I wondered if your readers know that the first hospital gown was designed by a man named Seymour Heiny. -- R. McA., JOHNSTOWN, PA.

DEAR R.: A true visionary.

DEAR ABBY: I am a nurse who works in intensive care. We have a saying where I work: "That's why they call it an I.C.U." -- KEN THE RN

DEAR KEN: And I'll bet you've seen more than your share.

DEAR ABBY: Twenty years ago, I was in the hospital going through a miscarriage, wearing a hospital gown. My roommate was a large woman who complained to the nurse that hers barely covered her. I told them we were wearing designer gowns. My roommate responded that it couldn't be true -- hers looked like a regular gown to her. I told her ours were made by "Jordass."

Once she stopping laughing, the nurse said she thought I'd emotionally and physically survive the miscarriage if I could make a joke at a time like that. Two years later, I became pregnant with my son, who's a high school senior this year. Even if you can't print this, I thought you would get a laugh from it. -- YOU CAN LAUGH OR YOU CAN CRY

DEAR YOU: I did -- and I want you to know I admire your strength in the face of adversity.

DEAR ABBY: Feel free to use all or part of this story from my latest book, "The Dog Ate My 'Things to Do' List -- What a Good Dog!" A brief history of the hospital gown:

"There is the straitjacket, the bullet-proof vest, the lead apron that wards off stray X-rays, and then there is the 'just put it on backward hospital gown.' Some say that Betty Barebottom invented this product. Betty, according to this account, wished to teach men two things. One: It isn't easy to wear a skirt and not expose your anatomy to a gawking world. Two: Men should understand how difficult it is to fasten things behind your back.

"Others claim that the designer of this impossible gown is a man named Seymour Butts. ... Although he considers the hospital gown the culmination of his life's work, Seymour currently works as a fashion designer. His line of unusual designs bears the label 'Butt First.'" -- DEAN CHAPMAN, CONCORD, CALIF.

DEAR DEAN: Whether Seymour's clothing line is famous or infamous is debatable, although no one can deny its popularity. The low-slung hip-hugger is "hot" from coast-to-coast regardless of the weather or the sex of the wearer. But that's another column.

P.S. Anyone interested in purchasing books by Mr. Chapman can get ordering information by contacting him: deanchap@aol.com.

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: My son, "Adam," came home from Iraq for a two-week visit. He brought with him some T-shirts for his father, his sister and me. They were last-minute purchases. Now my mother is furious that she didn't get a souvenir from Iraq.

Our extended family is huge, and Adam didn't have room to bring something for everyone. No one else in the family is upset about it. They're just glad he came home healthy and safe.

My mother complained to her sister, "Irene," and Aunt Irene sent Adam a card in Iraq ordering him to send my mother something. It upset him because he barely knows Aunt Irene.

When I defended my son, Mother said: "I am the grandmother. I should have gotten something." I told her no one expected anything from him.

Is she being unreasonable or am I? Adam is furious that this nonsense is going on while he's risking his life in Baghdad. I will forward your response to him. -- PROUD MOM IN OHIO

DEAR PROUD MOM: Please tell Adam that he is in my thoughts and prayers for his safe return from a dangerous tour of duty -- which his grandmother apparently has confused with a sightseeing tour. Your son doesn't owe anyone a gift. His gift to the family will be his safe return.

DEAR ABBY: I married my husband, "Greg," a year ago. He's a wonderful man from a wonderful family. His parents are upper-middle class and have always had money. Greg and I are just starting out, so we don't have a lot. His mother, "Ruth," has been generous and thoughtful enough to buy us many of the things we needed to establish our home.

Recently she has started buying me things from very expensive places. Ruth has terrific taste and I love everything she gets me. I always say thank you, and sometimes send her notes. Greg tells me she keeps buying me things because she sees that I use everything she gives me.

I want to do something nice for Ruth that will really be special, but our funds are very limited. No one has ever been so nice to me, much less bought me things, and I want her to know how touched and grateful I am. Any suggestions on how to show my appreciation? -- BLESSED IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR BLESSED: Just one. Take out pen and paper and write your mother-in-law a letter telling her how blessed you feel to have someone so loving and generous as she in your life. A love letter is one of those gifts that keep on giving joy to the recipient. I guarantee, it's something she will keep for a lifetime.

DEAR ABBY: I am a 13-year-old girl who was molested ever since I was 8. I told the police, and we are going to court about it -- but I can't stop thinking about it. I need help forgetting about it. I can't let my boyfriend near me. Please help. -- "MISSY" IN PENNSYLVANIA

DEAR "MISSY": You did the right thing in telling the police what happened. However, as big a step in the right direction as that was, there is more to do before you can heal from the abuse. Please clip this letter and give it to your mother. Counseling can help you to put the abuse behind you, and an excellent place to get it would be the nearest rape crisis center. An organization called R.A.I.N.N. will help your mother locate one for you. The toll-free number for its national sex-assault hotline is (800) 656-4673. You are a brave girl, and I wish you the best of luck.

For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)