DEAR ABBY: My daughter, "Chris," is 14. She'll be graduating from eighth grade in a couple of weeks. Over the last few months, I have been driving her and a group of boys and girls to the movies on Friday nights. This has evolved into a romantic relationship with a 15-year-old boy, "Bob," who lives close by and is in her class. In her junior high school, this is described as "going out."

I know they kiss. They also dance together at a local hangout on Saturday nights. I could refuse to drive them to the movies together, but they would probably meet there anyway.

Chris has a level head on her shoulders. She's a good girl and active in our church. We talk openly together.

Abby, can you guide me in this? I trust my daughter, but I am also aware that 14- and 15-year-olds have a lot of raging hormones. Please advise. -- WISHES KIDS CAME WITH HANDBOOKS

DEAR WISHES: I agree that teenagers have raging hormones, and the most intelligent way to deal with it is to keep the teens occupied. You are already on the right track, keeping the lines of communication open, for which I applaud you.

I see no harm in your daughter being at the movies with this boy and a group of friends on weekends in light of the fact that you are providing the transportation and they are in a group. But much of her free time should be occupied with constructive pursuits such as sports, volunteer work, music and activities that will give her "service credits" toward college. Develop her interests. Keep her goal-oriented. Encourage her to develop platonic friendships. You can't prevent your daughter from growing up, but you can give her guidelines and make sure her time is well spent.

DEAR ABBY: From fourth to ninth grade, I attended a small Christian school in Delaware. It was a great experience because the teachers and the students were able to really get to know one another.

One of the teachers, Mr. C., was one of the best a student could ever hope to have. Learning was fun in the subjects he taught, especially U.S. history. Can you imagine taking a class of 20 on an overnight camping trip to Gettysburg?

While talking to my mom, who was a co-teacher with Mr. C., about an upcoming business trip to Asheville, N.C., Mom mentioned that Mr. C. lives there and encouraged me to try to find him. Well, it turned out that Mr. C. was the only Mr. C. in the Asheville phone book.

We spent a wonderful afternoon reminiscing about his days as a teacher and mine as a student. Although I don't remember much about the subjects he taught, I will never forget the time he spent with us -- laughing while we played football on the playground, crying when a classmate passed away. He was always there for us.

One of his favorite lines was: "Don't hurt him! He is the only one we have like him!" Now that I work with children, I find myself using his favorite phrase.

Abby, please encourage your readers to take the time to look back and thank those teachers who made a difference in their lives. They helped to make us who we are today, and it would be rewarding for them to see the fruits of their labors. -- GRATEFUL IN NORTHERN OHIO

DEAR GRATEFUL: I have said it before and I'm pleased to say it again: Everyone wants to know that he or she has made a difference. Teachers don't earn much in the way of salaries; letters and calls of appreciation from former students can be extremely gratifying to former teachers who have helped to shape our lives. So if you've been putting it off, why not do it now?

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: "Burned in Victoria, Texas" wrote that she had been badly hurt after her three-year relationship with a man she had known since childhood fell apart. She asked for encouragement in entering the dating scene again -- something she has been afraid to do since the romance ended a year and a half ago.

You advised that although the experience had been a painful one, it had been a valuable learning experience -- and said (among other things) that it's worth kissing a few frogs once you finally meet Prince Charming.

I thought she could use some encouragement from someone who has been in the same boat. I, too, was convinced I would never become attached to anyone again.

Then I landed a job as a teaching assistant at the university I attend, and met "George." He asked me out several times; each time I gave him the excuse that I was "too busy." One evening he prepared a dinner of my three favorite foods (all by himself), packed it in a picnic basket, and brought it to me at the research office. We talked and laughed for hours, and I finally told him the real reason I wasn't seeing anyone.

He explained that there are nice men out there who understand and don't mind taking things slow -- and he was one of them. We have been inseparable ever since. And he has kept his word.

My message to "Burned": There are kind men who will understand your feelings and cherish you for the wonderful person that you are. You and I are very much alike, and I assure you that all of your waiting will pay off in the end. You are not alone. You have support from another Texan. -- NO LONGER LONELY IN DALLAS

DEAR NO LONGER LONELY: Bless you for your words of encouragement. Dating can be arduous. It can take stamina, a strong sense of self-worth, and a sense of humor to make it to the end of the process unscathed. You are not the only Texas gal who reached out to "Burned." Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I can identify with that 23-year-old girl because I had a similar experience. My pride and self-confidence were also crushed. I felt worthless. After five years, I took matters into my own hands.

On my 30th birthday, I got the best gift God could have given me. A friend and I began dating. I asked HIM out for our first date (something I'd sworn I'd never do). I haven't looked back since. We were married last June.

You were right, Abby, when you told "Burned" that her bad relationship was a learning experience. I hope she takes your advice to heart and doesn't let it keep her down. She needs to take that first step forward. You never know what you can accomplish until you try. -- VERY HAPPY IN COMMERCE, TEXAS

DEAR VERY HAPPY: Well said. I would like to extend that message: No one ever accomplished anything by sitting passively and waiting for success to come to them. The greatest rewards come to those who have the courage to stand up, step forward and take their swings at bat.

For everything you need to know about wedding planning, order "How to Have a Lovely Wedding." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby, Wedding Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I am almost 22 and become very emotional when I hear about friends who are expecting. All my friends from high school have children. My mother already had two children by the time she was my age.

My boyfriend and I are madly in love; however, he continues to tell me he's not ready to be a parent. We don't take precautions when we have sex, but I haven't become pregnant yet.

Abby, should I be feeling desperate to have a child? Am I rushing parenthood? -- WANTS A BABY NOW

DEAR WANTS: Before you make a mistake that could affect three lives (yours, your boyfriend's and that of an innocent child), I urge you to get to the bottom of what's missing in your life that has made you "desperate" to fill that void with a baby. You have a way to go before you'll be ready to become a mother -- and your first stop along the way should be at the altar.

Parenthood can be rewarding and fulfilling, provided the couple is prepared, emotionally and financially, for the new arrival. But your boyfriend has made it clear that he isn't ready. Please respect that fact and do what is necessary to prevent a "surprise." Having a child because your parents had two at your age, or because your friends from high school have children, is a poor reason to become a parent.

DEAR ABBY: I am a college freshman (female), living more than 300 miles from home. Despite the distance and the fact that I am 18, I am still under my parents' thumb. They call me every day to ask what I ate for breakfast, lunch and dinner. They chose my major for me, and the prospect of spending my life in that profession doesn't thrill me.

I have never had the strength to tell my parents how I feel or what I think, even when I knew that they were wrong or unfair. I love them and respect their opinions, but I believe I deserve more input regarding my own future -- especially since I am paying more than half the cost of my education. How can I free myself from their well-meaning, but strangulating nets? -- FRUSTRATED IN NEW YORK

DEAR FRUSTRATED: Cutting the cord will take some work on your part. You are the "good child" who never questioned or rebelled, so it's entirely possible that your parents think you're in 100 percent agreement with them. The daily phone calls indicate that they're having trouble accepting that you have left the nest and are on your own.

The place to start is at the student health center, inquiring about counseling services. Your inability to stand up for yourself and express your true feelings can be remedied with assertiveness training and counseling, which will help you learn where your parents leave off and you begin. It may not be easy, but I assure you it will be time well spent.

DEAR ABBY: I invited a neighbor to my son's bar mitzvah. I did not invite their children, who are 8 and 6.

When they RSVP'd, they said that all four of them were attending. What can I do? -- ON THE SPOT IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR ON THE SPOT: You welcome them graciously. I am surprised that you excluded the children in the first place, since a bar mitzvah or bat mitzvah usually includes children, and is not considered an adults-only affair.

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $5 (U.S. funds only) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)