DEAR ABBY: Last year I took time from work to assist my mother-in-law who was facing surgery in another state. During my visit, her next-door neighbor told me my visit was a "positive sign." When I asked what he meant, he said my in-laws had told him that I had kept their son from visiting and having a relationship with them since we married more than 15 years ago.
Abby, I was stunned! The truth is, my husband calls or visits his mother only when I insist on it. I have even dialed their number and put the phone in his hand so he HAD to talk to them. He feels closer to my family and enjoys the time we spend with them.
I told my husband what the neighbor said. He dismissed it and said his parents are just unhappy people. Abby, should I tell my in-laws the truth, or let them continue to believe I am responsible for driving a wedge between their son and them? -- PUZZLED DAUGHTER-IN-LAW
DEAR DAUGHTER-IN-LAW: Blaming you for the distance between them and their son may be an easier pill to swallow than placing the blame where it belongs. However, I see nothing to be gained by telling them "the truth" at this late date. They probably wouldn't believe you if you did.