DEAR ABBY: I am a 45-year-old divorced mother of three. "Jeff," the man I am seeing, is kind, patient, understanding and generous. He is a gentleman. There isn't anything I want or wish for that he does not get for me. Jeff sends me flowers several times a month. He loves my children dearly. I could not ask for a more perfect man.
The problem is: HE'S STILL MARRIED. Jeff and his wife have been separated for 10 years. He refuses to see a lawyer, even for consultation, because he says he can't afford a divorce. He's convinced his wife will take "everything." How can he be certain if he doesn't talk to someone?
I love Jeff with all my heart, but quite frankly, I am tired of waiting. I want to be his wife. I know Jeff loves me with all his heart, mind, body and soul -- but maybe not enough to get married.
Abby, how much longer do I wait? -- EVERYTHING EXCEPT THE RING
DEAR EVERYTHING: The gentleman you are seeing may love you with his heart, mind, body and soul -- but he loves his current economic status more.
Ask yourself: Can I live like this indefinitely, or should I push for a commitment with the risk of "losing" him? Only YOU can answer that.