DEAR ABBY: This letter is in response to "Wm. T. Elliott" and his suggestion that "small children should have a whistle tied around their necks when they go on picnics and camping."

Abby, please accept this important reminder to parents: ANY cord, string, necklace or tie around a child's neck could KILL if accidentally snagged by a tree, bush, fence, swing, etc. Parents should really protect little ones by PINNING or CLIPPING on that whistle! –- A CONCERNED PARENT AND PHYSICIAN, TORRANCE, CALIF.

DEAR CONCERNED: I apologize for letting that slip by. You are not the only reader who hastened to point it out. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I agree that supplying a whistle for small children who are camping is a good one. However, since tying anything around the neck of a small child is a strangulation hazard, it would be better to securely attach it to a zipper pull, belt loop or shirt.

When my four children were small, I also laced a small ID tag onto their shoe for family outings -– zoos, hikes, etc. –- in case the child was too frightened or injured to give vital information. Nowadays you can have bracelets made up for that purpose. –- MARY ELLEN HANRAHAN, LYNNWOOD, WASH.

DEAR MARY ELLEN: Thank you for the input. A reader in Clackamas, Ore., also suggests that providing older children with walkie-talkies on camping trips is a good precaution in case they become separated from the family for any reason. That way the child can be heard from more than a mile away.

DEAR ABBY: Thank you for printing the letter from "Wm. T. Elliott" about the importance of carrying a whistle while camping.

Abby, a safety whistle should be carried not only while camping or in the woods, but at all times. Boaters carry whistles in case the power goes out and they are stranded. College students carry whistles for safety on campus. The elderly carry whistles in case they are attacked or are physically unable to call for help.

The American Whistle Corp., where I work, is the only manufacturer of metal whistles in the United States. We frequently receive letters from people relating how they have been saved by blowing their whistle while lost in the woods or while being mugged. Our most recent survival story came from a man who was having a heart attack and was unable to yell. He was, however, able to blow his whistle to get attention.

Once again, Abby, your column has been an instrument in saving lives. Thank you. -– JENNIFER BLACKBURN, COLUMBUS, OHIO

DEAR JENNIFER: I am sure many people will find your letter of interest. I am pleased to "blow the whistle" for safety. I have carried a whistle on my key ring for many years.

DEAR ABBY: My friends of many years and I are planning a special beach trip to celebrate a friendship that began in the late '50s in elementary school.

We are big fans of yours and would like to know if you have any words about friendship that you could share with us. It would be an honor and a thrill to hear from you. -– THE YA-YAS

DEAR YA-YAS: Friendship is a gift to be cherished. The way to have a good friend is to BE one!

Good advice for everyone -- teens to seniors -- is in "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It." To order, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I am a middle-aged man in my 40s. I have been married twice. Both marriages ended in divorce. I have a teen-age daughter from my first marriage.

Abby, I have not dated since my last marriage. It's not that I'm ugly; it's just that I was hurt very badly. I do not enjoy life, and I cannot seem to find happiness anywhere.

What can I do to live it up a little and find the happiness that I have been looking for? I don't need someone in my life to be happy, but my life is so routine -– I need a CHANGE. Any suggestions would be helpful. -– BORED IN ROANOKE, VA.

DEAR BORED: The best antidote for boredom is to do something for someone else. It's the front-door key to fulfillment!

Explore volunteer opportunities in your city. Look in the telephone directory under the heading of "Volunteer Services," join a service club, or make inquiries at your library, your local hospital or seniors' center.

Another suggestion: Take a vacation and visit someplace you have never been. Travel, even day trips, provides a stimulating change of scene.

Don't forget to tell your friends, neighbors and relatives that you are interested in meeting someone.

Try any or all of the above and you'll be on the road to the happiness you seek.

DEAR ABBY: I'm sending this in response to "Sad Father in Connecticut." Many of us who have lost a child have felt the sting of insensitive people. The enclosed poem by Rita Moran was printed in "The Compassionate Friends" newsletter in Fort Lauderdale, Fla. Feel free to share it if you wish. –- NANCY LEFFEL, BEREAVED MOTHER, FORT LAUDERDALE, FLA.

DEAR NANCY: Thank you for sending the poem. Many people feel awkward about expressing their sympathy to families who have experienced a loss. Rita Moran's poem not only contains a strong message, it also offers helpful advice for those who don't know what to say. Read on:

PLEASE, don't ask me if I'm over it yet.

I'll never be over it.

PLEASE, don't tell me she's in a better place.

She isn't here with me.

PLEASE, don't say at least she isn't suffering.

I haven't come to terms with why she had to suffer at all.

PLEASE, don't tell me you know how I feel,

Unless you have lost a child.

PLEASE, don't ask me if I feel better.

Bereavement isn't a condition that clears up.

PLEASE, don't tell me at least you had her for so many years.

What year would you choose for your child to die?

PLEASE, don't tell me God never gives us more than we can bear.

PLEASE, just say you are sorry.

PLEASE, just say you remember my child, if you do.

PLEASE, just let me talk about my child.

PLEASE, mention my child's name.

PLEASE, just let me cry.

To receive a collection of Abby's most memorable -- and most frequently requested -- poems and essays, send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby's "Keepers," P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: I'm writing on behalf of the residents in my development. We're middle-class citizens who take care of our homes. Our lawns are neat and trimmed and our flower beds are weeded. Our "stuff" is kept in garages, sheds or in our homes.

Last summer a new family moved into our neighborhood. They bought the first house you see when you enter our main street. Abby, the place is a mess! "Stuff" is all over the place (piles of junk left out over the winter). To their credit, a shed was started, but it was blown down after a few days and now the lumber just lies there.

Since their property backs up to the main road, they don't bother driving around the block to park –- they drive through the yard! The tire ruts are now evident, and it detracts from our well-kept lawns. We can only imagine what has happened to property values. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. –- DUMPED ON IN DELAWARE

DEAR DUMPED ON: I agree that if their property has become an eyesore, it could affect the value of other homes in the neighborhood. Inquire at City Hall whether or not there are codes or ordinances in place that restrict homeowners from leaving junk on their lawns. Then ask the offenders if they might like some help in cleaning up their yard, and offer to lend a hand. Perhaps some of the other neighbors would also like to help.

If that doesn't work, you and the rest of the property owners should consider starting a neighborhood association that will have some clout. And, of course, consult a lawyer who specializes in real estate law.

DEAR ABBY: This is in response to "Jewish in Cincinnati," who offered a litany of ways in which Christians broadcast their religious beliefs.

He or she should move to metropolitan New York where entire malls are closed every Sunday because of "blue laws," and stores are closed on Saturdays because of strict Jewish beliefs. I give all of the aforementioned credit for honoring God. However, when "Jewish in Cincinnati" complains about Christmas music blaring from October to January, let's not confuse Christianity with consumerism. Half those offending stores and malls may not even be owned by Christians.

I grew up in an inner-city neighborhood in a small stretch of houses situated between a synagogue and a Jewish school. Every one of our neighbors had a strong sense of tolerance and caring. My grandma traded her Italian pastries with our Jewish neighbor for her delicious cheesecake. We manned the candy store, without thought of repayment, on high holy days for our Jewish neighbor. On Friday nights, my dad always turned off the lights at the synagogue.

It seems to me that we were more understanding and tolerant in years past. What are we really learning from Kosovo, or even Littleton, Colo.? So a comedian or celebrity needs to tell people he's Jewish. So what? It's his shtick! In the meantime, if you're traveling through Hashbrouck Heights, N.J., at Christmastime, you'll see my Roman Catholic church decorated with a nativity scene and a menorah. I think that's what makes America great! – ROMAN CATHOLIC IN NEW JERSEY

DEAR ROMAN CATHOLIC: I agree, and it harkens back to a gentler time when America pictured itself more a melting pot and less a patchwork quilt. The world would be a more hospitable place if attitudes were more inclusive and less exclusive. I'm reminded of the song lyric, "What the world needs now is love." (End of sermon.)

For an excellent guide to becoming a better conversationalist and a more attractive person, order "How to Be Popular." Send a business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby Popularity Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)