DEAR ABBY: I am writing you with the hope that people will read this and think about it. I lost my beautiful daughter and her fiance to a drunk driver. She was only 20, and her fiance was 23. The driver had three DUIs and the passenger had five. These two individuals, neither of whom had driver's licenses, left the scene of the accident. They did not help or even go for help, but just ran.
My daughter's wedding would have been in seven months. Most of the plans were complete. I miss my daughter so much. She was my only child. Her fiance was wonderful -- smart and such a kind person. This should never have happened. Our courts need to be tougher.
We chose to bury my daughter and her fiance side by side. On their headstone, we have a picture of the two of them hugging each other with their engagement date beneath the picture and the words, "Together Forever." It is a tribute to their memory. We have placed items on their grave many times.
Abby, I cannot understand why people have taken the items we left. I am shocked that people could be so cold and heartless that they'd take things off a grave. I know my baby is gone, but her body was placed there. I visit and take gifts out of love and respect for their memory. She was my life, my joy, my child. For someone to come and steal from her grave hurts beyond words. -- SAD IN SOUTH CAROLINA
DEAR SAD: Please accept my sympathy on the loss of your beloved only child.
Cemetery policies vary from place to place. Most cemeteries will allow items to remain on a gravesite only for a limited period, after which they are removed by personnel so the grounds can be properly maintained. Discuss your concerns with the cemetery's management to see if they have removed the items you left, or whether there may be a problem with theft. If items are being stolen, the management should be alerted so that security procedures can be put in place.