DEAR ABBY: Thank you for your column on the danger of food allergies.

I have had a lifelong allergy to peanuts, but only in recent years have I seen anything in print about this problem. Well-meaning but ignorant people have told me I am "spoiled" and "fussy," and it's only my imagination! Adults and children alike have tried to persuade me to eat peanuts, or even worse, have tricked me into eating them.

My allergy has become much more acute as I've grown older. At one point, I suffered a full-blown anaphylactic reaction. Your readers might find a chronology of the symptoms of an allergic reaction educational.

Here's what happens (usually within minutes). It is a true medical emergency, and every second counts: Your mouth starts to feel "funny" inside, then your wrists and hands begin to itch, followed by your armpits, then your crotch. That's just the beginning.

Your eyes and lips begin to itch and swell, then hives start to puff up and itch over your entire body and -- the really dangerous part -- you begin to wheeze because your mucus membranes are also affected, and your lungs begin to fill up. Then, your blood pressure begins to fall, and your body attempts to compensate for the drop in pressure by increasing the heart rate to 200 beats a minute (65 to 80 is normal).

At this point, you are close to cashing in your chips unless you can get a shot or two of epinephrine. And, even if your blood pressure doesn't dive, if your throat swells shut, you're in serious trouble because only an emergency tracheotomy (a hole in your windpipe so air can reach your lungs) can save you.

You will probably hear from other readers about the danger of food allergies. Thank you for making people aware. -- ELIZABETH A. CURRAN

DEAR ELIZABETH: Almost every year there is some mention in the media about an allergy-related tragedy or a close call experienced by someone who was not as fortunate as you. Food allergies are not the only problem. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I'm one of the many people who are highly allergic to perfumes. We seem to be an expanding circle, because I know nine other people with the same affliction.

I avoid crowds, do my shopping in the early morning hours, and try to sit away from others at funerals and weddings. One exposure leaves my nose congested and my lungs filled with fluid. I cough for days.

Why do people insist on drenching themselves in perfume? I was taught that restraint is important: A tiny drop on the wrist or neck is sufficient. No one is supposed to bathe in the stuff.

I recently attended a funeral, sitting well to the back and off to the side with my nonscented friends. Halfway through the service, the door opened and a wave of perfume wafted across the church. I was ill the remainder of the day.

Some advertisers place perfume samples in magazines, scenting the entire mail system. If this were my kingdom, perfume offenders would be relegated to isolated sections in public, and perfume bottles would require a warning label: "This product may be hazardous to the health of others."

Those who use perfume should have an honest friend check them out. The user's ability to judge the amount that should be used may be dulled from sensory overload. -- DORIS VOSS, TACOMA, WASH.

DEAR DORIS: Thank you for reminding my readers that an allergy is nothing to sneeze at.

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: The letter from "Good Neighbor, Ventura, Calif.," prompts this letter. Who elected her to be the neighborhood cop? My wife and I own a condo in Florida. The majority of the owners use their condos only for short vacations and rent them out the rest of the year. The complex is beautiful, but the busybodies there drive us nuts. These full-timers, who occupy only 10 percent of the units, think the complex is their private domain.

The year-rounders are overly concerned about tenants who have unapproved sunshades on their balcony or who fail to get permission to fly the American flag from their sunporches on the Fourth of July. They complain to security about children playing on the lawns (which are not off- limits) and don't understand that people in the swimming pool like to laugh, splash and have a good time. These crabs and cranks have driven away repeat renters. They dominate homeowner board meetings and almost always get their way. All the owners in our complex are supposed to be equal, but it seems that some are more equal than others.

"Good Neighbor's" mother was right. She IS a busybody, and you should have told her to mind her own business. People like her make us wish we had invested somewhere else. I'm eligible for retirement, but there's no way I'd ever retire to a condominium. -- SUFFERING FROM A CONDO COMPLEX, PARAMUS, N.J.

DEAR SUFFERING: Reread my answer. I refrained from name-calling, but I did caution "Good Neighbor" to be judicious when informing on her neighbors, reminding her that disapproval is not justification for "turning people in."

I also stressed that law enforcement needs reliable, serious witnesses who are willing to report crimes. But to irresponsibly report minor infractions is a waste of important official time. Read on:

DEAR ABBY: I was outraged when I read the letter from "Good Neighbor, Ventura, Calif." I am a law enforcement officer, and those "whistle-blowers" actually do more harm than good.

It is true that law enforcement officers frequently rely on citizens to alert them when a crime has been committed. These people can offer good leads, be good witnesses and provide a sense of security among their neighbors.

However, these whistle-blowers often don't realize that it is not their place to decide whether or not it is appropriate for someone to park, stand or walk somewhere unless their actions are creating a danger -- and not just an inconvenience -- to someone else. We are bombarded with crimes far more serious than illegally parked cars. Our time is committed to catching real criminals, not responding to tattletales. Nobody likes a tattletale. -- FIGHTING "REAL" CRIME, MILWAUKEE

DEAR ABBY: Your column on forgiveness some months ago was very moving. It reminded me of something I clipped from your column about seven years ago:

FORGIVENESS

The friend who ran off with your wife

Forgive him for his lust;

The chum who sold you phony stocks,

Forgive his breach of trust;

The pal who schemed behind your back,

Forgive his evil work;

And when you're done, forgive yourself

For being such a jerk.

-- LONGTIME READER

DEAR READER: The poem carries a worthwhile message. Who among us, at one time or another, did not need forgiveness?

To order Abby's booklet "The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It," send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054. (Postage is included.)

DEAR ABBY: All of us are disgusted with the amount of junk mail we receive. But it wasn't until I researched a speech for one of my classes that I realized the impact junk mail has had on our environment. Americans receive almost 2 million tons of junk mail daily! Fifty percent of it is never opened. That fact struck a chord with me. Now I'm making an effort to stop my junk mail.

I'd like to share some methods that work: First, contact an organization that provides the service of removing your name from mailing lists. Also, when you order anything (or receive junk mail that includes a self-addressed, stamped envelope), send a written request that the organization or company not add your name to its mailing list except for specific billing purposes related to your account. Also, state that you do not want your name given or sold to any other mailing lists, now or in the future.

To halt the delivery of catalogs, I have written a form letter on my computer and just fill in the new address, date it and drop it in the mail. It's also a good idea to keep a running list of companies to which you have sent the stop requests.

Even with my full-time job and carrying a full course load in college, I have managed to get this accomplished. Protecting the future environment for my children and grandchildren is an important priority. -- JUDIE SONGER, ROGERSVILLE, MO.

DEAR JUDIE: Conserving the environment is a concern to many readers, who will utilize your valuable suggestions. Mail (and telephone) solicitations become more numerous with time. Direct marketing to specifically targeted age-groups is a common sales strategy in our computer age.

To have your name deleted from these lists, write to: Mail Preference Service, Direct Marketing Association, P.O. Box 9008, Farmingdale, N.Y. 11735. There is no charge for this service. The lists are purged only once every quarter, so it may take some time to notice a change in the volume of junk mail you receive.

DEAR ABBY: I saved a favorite clipping from your column dated Aug. 5, 1982. It is an essay titled "On Youth." When you published it, you didn't know who wrote it, but later discovered that Samuel Ullman was the author. He was born in 1840 and died in 1924.

His essay is still relevant today, and I would like to see it in your column again. -- ALABAMA READER

DEAR ALABAMA READER: I'm happy to print it again. Its message is timeless.

ON YOUTH

"Youth is not entirely a time of life -- it is a state of mind. It is not wholly a matter of ripe cheeks, red lips or supple knees. It is a temper of will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions.

"Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old only by deserting their ideals. You are as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fears; as young as your hope, as old as your despair.

"In the central place of every heart, there is a recording chamber; so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer and courage, you are young.

"When the wires are all down and your heart is covered with the snows of pessimism and the ice of cynicism, then, and only then, have you grown old."

To order "How to Write Letters for All Occasions," send a business-sized, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: Dear Abby, Letter Booklet, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, Ill. 61054-0447. (Postage is included.)