DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I have been seeing a lady I met at work. Even though we can’t do much in the way of normal-type dates, we find ways to spend quality time together, and I have begun to believe we have a good chance at having something special.

The biggest drawback to my wanting to get too serious is that she is so involved with her grandkids that they always come first, no matter what.

I don’t want to compete with her family. They’re good people, and the kids are a pleasure to be around when we take them out to parks or for ice cream. But I don’t like knowing that my plans with their grandmother will be dropped like a hot potato when her daughter calls to ask for help with the kids. Am I wrong in wanting to have some priority in the life of the woman I’m coming to love? --- NOT INTO PLAYING SECOND FIDDLE

DEAR NOT INTO PLAYING SECOND FIDDLE: You shouldn’t feel that this is some kind of rivalry. I’ll venture a guess that your lady friend’s family will always be a top priority for her, and that’s completely reasonable and something that’s part of her package deal.

You’re relatively new in the picture, and perhaps you need to give it more time to see if you begin to be a bigger part of it, especially if it’s been awhile since your friend has been in a romantic relationship.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My fiancé graduated from medical school last spring, and already his family keeps calling him to get free medical advice, and some of them have even asked for him to write prescriptions for them so they don’t have to go to their regular doctors.

One of the reasons I love my future husband is that he is such a patient, kind, generous man. For obvious ethical and legal reasons, he politely refuses to write any scripts for non-patients, but it drives me nuts that people expect him to provide medical advice for free for the rest of his life. It makes me feel like he’s being used, and although he tells me he’s fine with it, I’m not.

How do I tell the freeloaders to go pay their own doctor for a change? --- ENGAGED TO A GOOD DOCTOR

DEAR ENGAGED TO A GOOD DOCTOR: There’s nothing new in family members with a profession being tapped for free advice. It’s something you’re going to have to get used to, like it or not, and it isn’t your place to discourage the advice-seekers. It’s your future husband’s call.

Bear in mind that his immediate family may have supported your fiancé materially and emotionally during his pursuit of his MD. Also, they might be more comfortable going to someone they feel they can trust to answer questions or provide translations of medical terms that may confuse or alarm them. It’s better than surfing the web and finding a lot of misinformation.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Before breaking up with her boyfriend, my roommate was hardly ever around. Now that they’re done, she barely leaves the apartment, not even to go for a jog, which was always her second favorite thing to do after spending time with her boyfriend.

They were together for a long time, and I get how sad she is, but sometimes it feels like she’s using me to keep her entertained and distracted, regardless of what else I need to be doing. We’re both still working at least half-time from home, and that means even though we’re in different rooms during work hours, we’re still often together. In the evenings, she expects I’ll keep her company binging shows or playing cards, or basically being with her every waking minute. She even always wants me to go to the food store or on any other errands she needs to run.

It’s driving me a little crazy. I get she’s hurting and wants to be distracted and all that, but I’ve always been more of a loner, which is one reason our sharing a place has worked so well for as long as it has.

How do I get the message to her that I need to have some time off from her without it seeming like another rejection, like the one she just suffered from her ex? --- SLIGHTLY SMOTHERED

DEAR SLIGHTLY SMOTHERED: It sounds like you’ve been a good and supportive companion to your broken-hearted roommate. Although she may not usually be this clingy, it might be part of her recovery process.

You mentioned she used to jog. Perhaps with the weather improving, you could encourage her to get back on track with that. If the solitary nature of running doesn’t appeal to her right now, you might suggest she investigate local running clubs. Depending on where you live, organizations such as Road Runners Club of America and departments of recreation are finding ways to keep people connected and moving, which could provide both your roommate with safe socialization and much needed exercise — and some equally much needed time off for you.