DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Our daughter’s fiancé is a big believer in living the casual life when in his own home. This extends to his not feeling a need to wear a shirt, and usually he only has on a pair of flip flops and running or exercise shorts.

I’ve gotten used to it, but when I bring my 84-year-old mother over to their place for a visit, I can tell his being half-naked makes her uncomfortable, even though she’s too much of a lady to say anything. This is a woman who comes from the time when men wore shirts and ties pretty much wherever they went.

Do you think it’s unreasonable for an adult man to at least put on a shirt when entertaining guests in his home? I’m on the verge of simply not visiting with my mother anymore, which I know would hurt my daughter, who is very close to her grandma, but I have to be fair to my mom. --- NO SHIRT, NO VISIT

DEAR NO SHIRT, NO VISIT: Is your daughter aware of the semi-nude effect on her grandmother? If not, bring her into the picture, and together the two of you might be able to persuade your future son-in-law that it wouldn’t kill him to throw on a shirt and a decent pair of pants when his future grandmother-in-law stops by.

If that doesn’t work, then just start having the visits take place in locations where your daughter’s fiancé doesn’t set the dress Scode.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Our granddaughter is about to have her first baby and the names she and her husband have chosen have had my wife in tears. They are planning to name the child, first and middle names, for our grandson-in-law’s grandmother. They’re not even that close to her, but my wife says there is money involved, so they caved into his mother’s pressure.

Now they could have included one name from each side of the family, don’t you think? --- HAVING TO HEAR MY WIFE CRYING

DEAR HAVING TO HEAR MY WIFE CRYING: The desire to please what may be seen as the more demanding side of the family could be as much at work here as any inheritance considerations. If that’s the case, the young couple needs to grow a backbone, hopefully sooner rather than later.

Another issue that might be at play is that your grandson-in-law’s family adheres to the tradition of naming children for direct ancestors.

Whatever the case, instead of stewing over the situation, perhaps you and your wife can have a discussion with the young couple and ask, as a point of curiosity, the real rationale behind the name choices.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: Our state is still seeing high COVID case numbers, so all the local nursing homes are still closed to visitors. I understand all the precautions are necessary, but it is getting harder on both my grandpa and my family to only have short visits at his window. His nursing home had more than 20 positives, and two people were in the hospital. It makes us all nervous that he could be next.

He has dementia, and we can’t decide if it does him more good than bad when we show up with masks on and he can’t even see our faces to help him remember who we are. He still clearly knows my mom and dad, although he can’t always remember their names, but he is less sure about my brother, his wife, and their toddler, and me and my boyfriend, who my grandpa has known for years.

Do you think it’s just more scary and confusing for my grandfather to be seeing these people he doesn’t know for sure, all wearing masks, instead of our just waiting until we can visit without our faces covered and he can see who we are? --- DON’T WANT TO MAKE IT WORSE FOR MY GRANDPA

DEAR DON’T WANT TO MAKE IT WORSE FOR MY GRANDPA: This is a topic to discuss with your family and your grandfather’s caregivers, who see how he is after his visitors leave and may offer some useful feedback.

Your parents can ask if video chats are available, since that way your grandfather could see faces, even if it’s only on a cellphone or pad screen.

What might also help is if your family avoids group visits. One or two masked faces at a time might be easier for him to process and allow for a more focused visit.

Another thing you could do, if you already haven’t, is make sure your grandpa has labeled photos of loved ones. Since space is most likely limited in his room, photobooks and albums may be a good option.