DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My boyfriend keeps asking me to move in with him, but honestly, I don’t know if I could take his obsessive cleaning. He’ll do things like grab a glass I’m still using and wash, dry, and replace it in the cabinet if I leave it for five minutes to go to the bathroom or take a shower. When I stay over a couple of days, I feel like he’s going around behind me and straightening up.

I know he loves me, and I love him, but it worries me that I can’t see myself living with him if he doesn’t find a way to be less obsessive in his home. He seems to be able to control it when we’re out, and when he’s at my place, he seems less uptight. I don’t want this to be a deal breaker, but how do I get him to chill a little at home? --- NOT QUITE THE ODD COUPLE

DEAR NOT QUITE THE ODD COUPLE: I don’t know if this is necessarily a deal breaker, but it’s not likely an issue that’s going to go away just because you move in. If anything, being together more at his apartment may strain the relationship in new ways.

Talk openly to him about your concerns and your feelings. He may simply be someone who likes to be in control of his own environment, or his over-the-top housekeeping might be an indication of other issues. Either way, it’s something you’re going to have to work through with him if you’re going to take the next steps as a couple.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife and I just got married at the end of the summer. Neither of us could take time off for a honeymoon right after the wedding because we used most of our PTO planning and getting to our wedding.

Since we’d lived together for a while before we got married, we didn’t do a big gift registry. Instead, we asked for contributions to a fund for either a honeymoon or a down payment for a house. Many people, especially our close relatives, were very generous, and we now have enough for a dream honeymoon or a nice down payment on a two- or three-bedroom house in an older neighborhood we both like.

The trouble is, she wants to go for the house, and I want to go for the honeymoon. We’re in a large apartment now, and she talks about wanting to not wait too long to start a family, which to me says we should do the kind of travelling now that we won’t be able to do once we have kids.

Which do you think is a better use of the money? --- WANT TO TRAVEL NOW

DEAR WANT TO TRAVEL NOW: You and your bride both have valid points. A good honeymoon will give you memories for a lifetime. A home could be the biggest investment you ever make, and depending on long-range plans, could be the gift that keeps on giving.

Maybe you guys could come to a compromise by earmarking some of the money for a more modest honeymoon and keeping the balance for the house. If the two of you are working, making money, and not outspending your income, you should be able to sock away some of your own money to more easily afford both goals.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I am a grown man and don’t get why my parents are getting so bent out of shape about my New Year’s resolution to give a quarter of what I earn to charity. I told them when I was home for Thanksgiving, and it seems like they should be happy I’m doing something good. But every time I talk to either of them, they start going off on me. What’s their problem? --- WOULD LIKE MY PARENTS TO SUPPORT MY RESOLUTION

DEAR WOULD LIKE MY PARENTS TO SUPPORT MY RESOLUTION: Your generosity is admirable, but only if it doesn’t jeopardize your ability to pay your bills and not starve. It may be these are the kinds of things your parents are concerned about, and unless you’re able to reassure them that you aren’t heading for financial trouble because of your altruism, I can’t say I blame them.