DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: We bought our first house three years ago, and right after we unpacked and set the house up, my husband started fussing with the yardwork. He’s up early every Saturday morning and doesn’t get done until late in the afternoon. Honestly, the yard does look awesome, but I don’t get what he’s doing all that time. Besides, it makes it hard for us to do anything else during the Saturdays from April through October.

Do you think his “hobby” as he calls it is a healthy one? --- THE GARDNER’S WIFE

DEAR THE GARDNER’S WIFE: We all need hobbies, and I can think of a lot less healthy and productive ones than spending a few hours a week keeping your property looking good, at least at ground level. I know many people who find it therapeutic to work outdoors, especially if they are inside for their jobs all week long.

While your husband is busy doing his thing, you should take advantage of the time to also get busy with pursuits or projects of your own.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My husband and I have been married for a while now, and from the time we started going together, my father has made it clear he doesn’t like my husband. It’s been a while since he has gone out of his way to openly make my husband feel uncomfortable, but after all this time, you can still feel a definite tension whenever the two of them are in a room together, and my father never stops with the passive-aggressive comments.

I try to ignore it, and so does my husband most of the time, but sometimes it’s more than he can take, and he pushes back, and it can get ugly.

I’m at the point where it’s just easier to avoid my dad all the time. It hurts me that I have to do that, but it hurts me even more that he constantly disses the man I picked to share the rest of my life with. Am I wrong to avoid my father? --- DAUGHTER CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE

DEAR DAUGHTER CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE: The only slightly encouraging thing you mentioned is that your dad has backed off a little bit, and maybe that will continue to be the case. However, until you see real evidence of a softening in his adverse feelings toward your husband, and until he can keep his thoughts to himself, I think you’re right in avoiding situations where the two men are together.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I’ve known my wife since before we graduated college three years ago. She was a totally dedicated student and did really well in school. Now she’s a legal assistant, she’s becoming a workaholic, and we have less and less time together. I work a fairly 9-5, Monday-Friday job, and at the end of it, I want to have some time with my wife, but she’s always late at the office and often going in on at least one day of the weekend.

When we talk about how I feel, she says this is what her job is about, and it’s something I’ll just have to get used to.

Am I being selfish? I want to support her career, but I worry it’ll advance at the cost of our marriage. --- MY WIFE IS A WORKAHOLIC

DEAR MY WIFE IS A WORKAHOLIC: The legal profession is certainly a demanding one. Your wife will need your support and understanding if she’s going to succeed in it.

It would help you to develop enough interests of your own to help fill your leisure time when your wife is at the office.

At this point, it seems likely that it’ll also fall to you to make the couple-time plans, as you continue reminding her how important it is to your marriage to have time together ─ not just when she comes home exhausted after a six-day workweek.

While you don’t want to sound whiney and needy, you have to help her understand it takes two to make a marriage work.