DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: We have three grandsons and a granddaughter. My wife and I have always gotten along well with them, until lately. One of the boys and his sister have started taking things from our house when they visit. They must think we don’t know, but it’s hard to ignore things going missing almost every time they drop in.

Their parents have been having a rough time with their jobs, and I hate to pile this on them too, but don’t you agree it’s time to bring them into it? My wife thinks we should just take care of it ourselves, but I don’t think that’s enough? --- GETTING PICKED CLEAN

DEAR GETTING PICKED CLEAN: I agree with your wife that you need to confront your grandkids directly with what you believe they’re doing. I also agree with you that their parents need to be told what’s been happening. Their job situations may be behind what the kids behavior, but whatever the cause, something isn’t right when grandkids steal from their grandparents.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I just got a new boss. He is very young, mid-30s. He is making lots of changes, but one big one is he plays music in our office all day. I am talking hard rock and rap, foul language, LOUD, LOUD bass. Just loud.

I am 55 and have to admit I am having trouble concentrating with constant, loud music, and I don't feel like it is appropriate music for when customers come in. But I hesitate to say anything because I already feel so old and I don't want to cause problems when he has only been here not even a month!

So, I clench my teeth and try to push through each day, but my nerves are really getting frayed. Am I just too old, or is this not the way to run a business? --- TOO OLD FOR TOO LOUD

DEAR TOO OLD FOR TOO LOUD: Maybe it’s because I’m “old” too, but I avoid businesses with overloud music. And, unfortunately, profanity is becoming so mainstream in our culture that many people are desensitized to its presence in lyrics.

That said, I think you wouldn’t be wrong to suggest to your new boss that some of your older customers, or customers with young children, may not feel comfortable conducting business under the conditions you describe. If he can be convinced that his choice of background music could hurt the business’ bottom line, he might tone it down at least a bit.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My maid of honor asked for a list of must-have guests for my bridal shower. I come from a large family, most of which live nearby here in Central Florida, but one cousin is married to a Canadian and they live in Alberta.

I am on the fence about inviting her, because I don’t want her to feel like she has to travel down here for the shower and then in a few weeks again for the wedding. One of my aunts said I should as a courtesy. What do you think? --- FLORIDA BRIDE-TO-BE

DEAR FLORIDA BRIDE-TO-BE: By all means, I say send her an invitation. She may surprise you and be able to attend, and if not, you won’t run the risk of offending her when she finds out she didn’t get invited, especially if all the other female relatives did.