life

Couple Divided Over Financial Planning

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | April 16th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My wife and I recently came into some money when her unmarried uncle passed away. It isn’t a ton of money, but it’s enough to help us get a jump on a serious savings program. She wants to put it all in a college fund for our toddler, I want to start a retirement fund to supplement what we’ve got through our jobs. We’re getting mixed advice from our own parents, and that’s just making it worse. Where would you put the money? --- SAVING FOR THE FUTURE

DEAR SAVING FOR THE FUTURE: Where I’d put the money these days is into retirement savings, but I’m a lot closer to that time of life than you and your wife.

The good news is that since neither of you is looking to spend the money right away, at least you’re both on the same page about the value of planning for the future. Putting your money in college funds or IRAs are both good ideas, but come with restrictions on accessing what you deposit into them, which may prevent your using any of the funds in case of a financial emergency.

Rather than putting all the money in one place, consider dividing it between carefully investigated options. Your bank should be able to give you some guidance, and offer shorter-term investments like CDs or money market accounts where your windfall can earn interest while you decide what to do with it for the longer haul.

life

Unstable Management Makes for Stress on the Job

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | April 11th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: For the past six years I have worked for a small home healthcare agency. The company is owned by a woman who claims she believes in a hands-off management style, but we have gone through four on-site managers in the past three years. Every time a new manager comes in, things get shaken up. Schedules get changed, new people are brought in, and others either have their hours or their jobs cut. It is very stressful to never know if I will have a job within weeks of a new manager taking over.

Overall, I enjoy the job, and when I get the hours I was told I would have, I’m able to work out childcare with my husband or mother-in-law so we save money on that. But I don’t always get my hours, and some of the managers have been real micromanagers, and morale is down. I haven’t worked too many different jobs, but I’m beginning to wonder if this is normal. Is it? --- STUCK IN STRESS

DEAR STUCK IN STRESS: It’s not unusual for small, family- or individual-owned companies to be micromanaged. It happens in larger businesses too. It really becomes a question of whether or not the job is meeting most of what you’re looking for it to provide (good hours, acceptable wages, a safe and comfortable working environment, for instance). If not, it may be time to start looking around. If so, then the instability may be a compromise you decide to live with.

life

Still Stuck on Good Friend's Ex

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | April 10th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: One of my closest friends dated a girl for nearly three years, and all that time I had strong feelings for her. They broke up nearly a month ago. No one’s to blame. They realized they want different things out of life.

When my friend told me what she wanted, it made me feel even worse about not having her around anymore, because her idea of a good life is so close to mine.

I really want to ask this girl out, but I feel that it would be a weird situation. Do you think I have to ask my friend’s permission to ask his ex-girlfriend out? --- STUCK ON THE GIRL

DEAR STUCK ON THE GIRL: As a courtesy, you should give your friend a heads-up about your plans, however there’s no reason you need to get his permission to ask his ex out.

I have little doubt that if you two start dating, it’ll be strange at first when you’re around mutual friends, especially the ex-boyfriend; but if there’s a real connection between you and the girl, it’ll be worth a little initial awkwardness.

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