DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: My grandmother moved into an assisted living place last December. Whenever I go to visit her, she is usually hanging out with one guy, and the staff tells me, like it is cute or something, that they are always together. I don’t want this guy taking advantage of my grandma. She never did any of the financial stuff when my grandfather was alive, and I just have a feeling this guy is out for her money. My grandmother is nearly 80 and has a little dementia, so why shouldn’t I worry? --- CONCERNED GRANDDAUGHTER

DEAR CONCERNED GRANDDAUGHTER: One of the main reasons people move into assisted living communities is so they’ll have some companionship. It sounds like your grandmother has found that, and other than the fact that she spends time with her new friend, you don’t mention if there’s been anything you’ve observed to support your concerns. If you have, you need to raise them with your parents, if they’re in the picture. If not, you can approach an administrator at the center and tell him or her what you’ve seen.

Take care though, because if you raise a false alarm, it might adversely affect your grandmother’s comfort and happiness ─ and that of her friend.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I met a girl who works in a store near my army post. She is smart and hard-working. We are far from serious right now, but my mom is sure this girl is only out to snag a soldier so she can live the good life. Every time we talk we end up fighting when she starts with her, “So, how’s the little dependa?”

I hate that she tries to make me feel bad about the girl I like, especially since she is anything but a dependa in the making. She plans to go on to earn a bachelor’s in the fall to be a teacher, after she finishes her AA degree this spring. Does that sound like someone who just wants to take advantage of a uniform to you? --- SHE’S NO DEPENDA

DEAR SHE’S NO DEPENDA: Although she’s probably not going about it the right way, your mom may truly be concerned about your being a target for someone looking for military spouse status. It does happen, and it’s wise for you to be on your guard.

That said, this girl sounds like she has ambitions beyond relying on someone else to provide for her, and that’s good news for everyone. Stress this to your mom the next time she pushes your buttons about the girl.

If that doesn’t shut the criticism down, either divert the conversation to other topics, or cut back on your calls until the dust settles a bit. If you do get serious with the girl, your mom will have to get over it or jeopardize her relationship with you.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When I agreed with my partner that it was time to get a dog, I thought we would be taking care of it together. Nope. Six months into it and I’m the one who does the walking, training, cleaning up after, and vet visits.

I have definitely fall in love with our spaniel, but how did I end up being a “single parent”? --- COULD USE SOME HELP HERE

DEAR COULD USE SOME HELP HERE: So long as the decision was truly mutual, you need to remind your partner that your four-legged baby has two adopted parents. Not sharing the responsibilities will lead to further, deeper resentments, and that doesn’t do anybody any good.

Basic as it sounds, try making a job list or walking schedule so your partner doesn’t continue to assume it’s all on you.