life

Tag-Along Hubby Wears Wife Down

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | February 27th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I was married and divorced by the time I was 22. My first husband was a weirdo who never wanted to do anything with me outside our apartment. I was so happy to find a nice, normal guy the next time out.

My second husband and I got married a year ago and things are going pretty well. My biggest complaint is that he wants to do everything I do ─ all the time. Except for getting out with the girls a couple times a month, he expects us to be together whenever we’re not at work. It’s like I’ve gone from one extreme to the other and I need some time to myself, and I think he needs some hobbies of his own. Am I wrong to want to do my own thing? My first husband never did anything but what he wanted to do, and look how that turned out. --- WIFE OF A TAG-ALONG

DEAR WIFE OF A TAG-ALONG: Your new husband may be under the impression that given the behavior of your ex, he is giving you what you want by being always available and at your side; but not many couples can survive very long if they don’t leave each other at least a little space. There’s a big difference between doing everything together and never doing the same things at all.

I agree your husband would most likely benefit from finding and following some pursuits of his own. Encourage him to develop his own pastimes and leave you to the ones you enjoy ─ without him along for the ride.

life

Girlfriend's Tastes Are Too Rich for Boyfriend's Wallet

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | February 26th, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I am with a girl who comes from a richer background than my own. Her parents are both doctors and you could fit three of my parents’ houses in hers. We met at school and I think I am the first guy she has dated who is not country club-ready.

It isn’t that she asks me to drop a lot of money on her, but I always feel like if I don’t, she’ll walk. How do I draw the line without losing the girl? --- MIDDLE CLASS BOYFRIEND

DEAR MIDDLE CLASS BOYFRIEND: You shouldn’t have to go broke to impress anyone. Give the girl some credit. If you’ve been together long enough to have visited each other’s homes and families, she would have to be pretty dense not to notice the differences.

When you’re together, be yourself and keep to a reasonable budget. If it turns out she demands more than you’re comfortable being able to spend, then you have to consider if she’s in the relationship for you, or rather for what she can get out of you.

life

Adult Kid Walks in on Parents

Ask Someone Else's Mom by by Susan Writer
by Susan Writer
Ask Someone Else's Mom | February 21st, 2019

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I remember years ago having a conversation with some girlfriends about whether or not any of us had the experience of the kids walking in on a love making session. At that point, I was among the women who said no.

However, now that our kids are all grown and out of the house, it happened the other night that one of them decided to pop in after going to the movies, and figuring my husband and I were just reading in bed, did a quick knock and enter. Well, we weren’t reading, but we were busy. Our daughter just pulled the door shut and beat a hasty retreat. I haven’t spoken to her since, and was wondering if you think it’s a good thing to bring it up, or just let sleeping dogs lie? --- CAUGHT IN THE ACT

DEAR CAUGHT: Whether you bring the situation up or not depends on the relationship you have with your daughter and how you’ve dealt with the subject of sex up to this point with her.

Personally, I’d hope she finds it reassuring and inspirational that the “old man and woman” still get it on ─ a concept that often seems to elude younger people.

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