DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: When my boyfriend proposed to me, he presented me with his grandmother’s engagement ring. It’s pretty and all that, but not at all my style. I need some help telling him I would like something different. --- NOT LOVING THE ROCK
DEAR NOT LOVING THE ROCK: It may be that your fiancé can’t afford a new ring right now. It could be he sees his grandmother’s ring as a way to welcome you fully into his family. Or, perhaps he didn’t know where to even start choosing a ring for you. Whatever his motives, this is an early lesson in the necessity of communication and compromise in any successful long-term relationship.
You could ask what inspired him to go with the heirloom. Depending on his answer, you’ll have to decide how important the “perfect rock” is to you, and if it isn’t an option right now, so long as you love the guy who gave it to you, hopefully you’ll come to value his choice of rings too, even if it falls short of being your dream.