DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: The car I have been driving for the past three years since graduating college is the one my parents took over when my grandma could no longer drive because of eye trouble. It is a good car, but it now has a lot of miles on it and it really is a grandma car.

I have been in my current job for 7 months and I have begun thinking about replacing the car. My friends tell me getting a car loan is a good way to build credit, but I am nervous about taking on regular debt in addition to my college loan. Should I be? --- NERVOUS BORROWER

DEAR NERVOUS: Good for you to be concerned about taking on debt just to build credit. Car loans, like credit cards, are considered “bad debt,” but for most of us, these necessary evils are, well, necessary.

If your student loan is in your name and you’re staying on top of the payments, you’re already building credit by paying off “good debt.”

One widely recommended tool for young people looking to establish a healthy credit score is to begin with a secured credit card through your bank, credit union, or major credit card company. The beauty of this kind of card is that you can’t charge more than the amount of cash collateral required to open the account, which also serves as your credit limit.

Then, be patient about getting the new wheels. Since you don’t have a long or well-developed credit history, you’re likely to find the interest rates quoted to you will be a lot higher than if you take a few months – or better yet a year or more – proving you can keep current with the secured credit card and your student loan.

A double-bonus of waiting a bit to buy a car is that while you’re establishing credit you can also sock away more for a higher down payment, resulting in a smaller loan.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I met a guy at work who is just about everything I could ask for. He’s kind, considerate, smart, funny, and he really seems to get me. The only problem is I know my parents will go ballistic when they find out their white daughter is dating a black man. How do I break the news to them? --- SINGLE WHITE FEMALE

DEAR SINGLE: It’s sad to think mixed race couples still face so many obstacles to acceptance, including with those closest to them.

If you feel the time is right to meet the parents, it might be best to not make an issue of his being black before you arrive. Since they don’t know yet, you need only tell them you’re bringing someone you care deeply for home to meet them. If you set the color-blind example, hopefully they may eventually follow.

But the two of you have to be prepared for a less than warm welcome when you arrive. Try to make it a short visit and be sure to have an exit strategy ready so you can give your folks some time to adjust to a new reality.

There’s much to be said for the old “living to fight another day” strategy.

DEAR SOMEONE ELSE’S MOM: I moved back to my hometown after I wrapped up my master’s degree. I am working in my field, doing what I love for good money. All that is missing is a social life.

I am the youngest in my office, which is staffed mostly by middle-aged family men and women. The majority of my friends from high school have either moved elsewhere or are in serious relationships and not into going out much. My family is nearby, but it is not the same as having my own things to do and people my age to do them with. Any suggestions in jumpstarting my social life? --- SEARCHING FOR FRIENDS

DEAR SEARCHING: Maybe you just haven’t been looking for friends in the all the right places.

If you have any hobbies or favorite pursuits (exercise, music, movies, etc.), do a little on-line hunting to see if there are local groups that share your interests. Or, take a class in something you’ve wanted to learn more about, just for fun.

Volunteering is another route to pursue. As with the social connection sites, there are several reliable on-line volunteer match-up sites that provide ways to support your community, and as a byproduct, an introduction to new people – a win-win in my book.

You might need to expand the radius of your search and be willing to do a little travelling to connect with kindred spirits, but they’re out there. And, if you can’t find anything that appeals to you, be bold and take the initiative to start something new based on an interest near and dear to your heart.