DEAR NATALIE: I attended my best friend’s wedding over the weekend. During the reception (after the cake was cut!) my boyfriend of five years proposed to me on the dance floor. Everyone was so excited for us – except my best friend. How was I supposed to know he would do this during her wedding? It was a total surprise to me, too! I don’t understand what the big deal is. It wasn’t like he did it while they were walking down the aisle or during their first dance. Everyone congratulated me but she’s been frosty all week. Normally, we text throughout the day but I’ve hardly heard from her. What should I do to patch things up? -BE HAPPY FOR ME
DEAR BE HAPPY FOR ME: Let’s take a step back and look at this from her perspective. This was her wedding day and your fiancé decided to steal their thunder. It doesn’t matter that he proposed after the cake was cut. He couldn’t wait one day? I can understand why your friend is annoyed. You should call her and apologize. Say to her that you had no idea he was going to propose, and while you are so thrilled to be engaged, you completely understand why she is annoyed. You may even want to have your fiancé call and apologize, too. Clear this up now so it doesn’t fester. And while you’re at it, send some flowers. It can’t hurt.
DEAR NATALIE: My sister-in-law to be is driving me nuts. She is insistent on bringing her children to my adults-only wedding. I think she is mad because we are not having a bridal party, and therefore, no flower girls. I love my soon-to-be nieces, but I don’t feel as though it is appropriate for them to be at the wedding since they will be the only kids there. My sister-in-law is threatening to not come at all if her daughters aren’t invited. They are three-year-old twins. They are a handful and I love them, but I don’t want them at the wedding with no other kids around. If I invite them, everyone else will be hurt that they couldn’t bring their kids. Doesn’t she understand that for one day we would just like to have a night without anyone’s kids? Is that so wrong? My fiancé is on my side about this, but he has yet to tell her to her face how we feel. What should I do? -NO KIDS THANK YOU
DEAR NO KIDS THANK YOU: You have every right to have your wedding the way you want it to be. Since you and your fiancé are on the same page about things, it is just a matter of holding your ground. I don’t understand why your sister-in-law is making such a big deal out of this … doesn’t she want one night to herself child-free? If she threatens not to come, then that is her prerogative. But your fiancé needs to speak up. If you do decide to bend the rules, maybe there is a compromise here. Perhaps the girls can come for the ceremony and then leave before the reception. If this doesn’t sound plausible to you, however, don’t force the issue. This is your day. You get one special day. Can’t she just go along?
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