DEAR ABBY: I suffer from a moderate to severe case of social anxiety. I'm now in my first relationship with a partner who tends to move fast, and whose parents have recently been asking to meet me. This has caused tension in our relationship as well as in his relationship with his parents.
Because of some past experiences with previous partners, his parents have preconceived notions about me, which makes me feel all the more reluctant to meet them. I don't like feeling vulnerable, especially with people who don't know me. One counseling session with a boss, a professor, someone in authority, etc., and I'm on the verge of tears or already crying.
I know I'll have to meet his parents someday, but I don't know how to approach it. I feel overwhelmed just thinking about it. Please help. -- SOCIALLY ANXIOUS
DEAR SOCIALLY ANXIOUS: I hope you are receiving professional help for your social anxiety. You should not approach meeting your partner's parents with a negative attitude. Smile, put your best foot forward and try to make a good impression.
Keep in mind that this is not a performance review, a professor you need to give you a good grade or anyone in authority. They are parents of a son whose past judgment about partners may have been less than stellar, and of course they have concerns.
It would be nice if they thought the moon rose and set on you, but if they don't, will it affect your relationship with your partner? If the answer is yes, then he may not be mature and independent enough to be having a romance with anyone. Hold a good thought and stop hiding out.