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by Abigail Van Buren

Loss of Job Also Puts End to Man's Affair With Co-Worker

DEAR ABBY: Back in 2013, a co-worker, "Jamie," and I fell in love. Both of us were married to other people, but everything felt perfect. It was a feeling I never had for anyone in my life before. Three years later, I lost my job. The day I was terminated, my wife found out I had been cheating, so I ended the affair.

I have found full-time work and I'm still married, but I'm not in love with my wife like I am with Jamie. I have tried to stay in contact with her to prove to her that I'm a better man, with little success. She told me I was her only love, but I broke her heart.

She doesn't want to see me, even after several years of my trying to prove that I am the man she fell in love with. Her husband doesn't know anything. She's afraid I may break it off again. Should I continue pursuing her or give up and move on? I thought I could handle it on my own, but I need some advice. -- MISSING HER IN ONTARIO, CANADA

DEAR MISSING HER: If you and Jamie really loved each other, you would no longer be married to your spouses. Having been dumped by you once, your former lover has a point. Give up and move on and you will save yourself, your wife, Jamie and her husband a lot of pain.