DEAR ABBY: I have been married to the love of my life for 21 years. He has helped me raise my two children to adulthood. Both have now moved away and have their own lives.
My problem started a year and a half ago, when my grandson was born. I live 750 miles from my daughter and her little boy, and have a standing invitation to see them as often as I want (every three to four months). It makes more sense for me to travel to see them than the reverse.
I have always invited my husband to come with me, but he refuses. He has now given me an ultimatum: I can see them no more than twice a year or he will divorce me. What do you say, Abby? -- DUMBSTRUCK IN MAINE
DEAR DUMBSTRUCK: I say you have three choices -- either work this out with the help of a marriage counselor, see your daughter and grandson only twice a year or start talking to a lawyer. I have a strong hunch there's more going on here than you have revealed in your letter -- and whether or not your husband agrees to counseling, you should go.