DEAR ABBY: I came into a large sum of money because of an accident a relative of mine was in about a year ago. I spent it on a variety of items for myself, my husband and my mother. I paid off some debt and medical bills, and we also made two significant purchases as well as many small ones. Seventy-five percent of the money has been spent. I am OK with that and so is my husband.
My financial adviser, who has been managing two of the beneficiary accounts from the accident, has asked me about the other funds I received. I know to some people I was irresponsible and I should have saved as much as I could. I'm nervous about telling him what I chose to do. I'm afraid he'll judge me for not being more frugal with the money.
Truth be told, it isn't his business how that money was spent because he wasn't managing it for me. How should I tell him about it? I feel like a typed letter is my best bet. -- NERVOUS IN KOKOMO, IND.
DEAR NERVOUS: I hope you realize that you are thinking like a guilty child and not the adult you are now. If you prefer to answer your money manager's question via a typed letter, that is your privilege.
However, it would be quicker and faster if you stop worrying about his reaction, pick up the phone and talk to the man. I agree it's not his job to "judge" you, but he would not be acting in your best interest if he didn't advise you how to provide for your future with the monies you have left after the spending spree you have described. Be prepared for it, and please do not regard anything he says as criticism from a scolding parent, because he's not your father.