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by Abigail Van Buren

Ungrateful Niece Avoids Writing Thank-You Notes

DEAR ABBY: My niece had a bridal shower last March. When thank-you notes didn't arrive for the gifts she had been given, she said they were "lost in the mail" and she would thank everyone in her wedding thank-yous. Abby, she was married last May and she hasn't sent out thank-you notes for her wedding gifts, either.

The gifts my parents and I gave her were expensive, and I am upset about it. By the way, she wasn't too busy to write them because she doesn't work. Should I confront her or let it go? -- DISGUSTED IN MIDDLEBURG HEIGHTS, OHIO

DEAR DISGUSTED: Your sibling did a poor job of raising her daughter. If your niece didn't know that thank-you notes were supposed to have been sent for her shower gifts, she wouldn't have lied about them having been lost in the mail.

However, I see nothing to be gained by confronting her. If you do, it will cause your sibling to become defensive. Better to make note of it and respond accordingly when the baby shower invitations start coming in because that's what is sure to come next.

Read more in: Etiquette & Ethics