DEAR ABBY: About a year ago I became engaged to a very special man. We have decided to be married during a weeklong cruise we have taken the past two years. We knew some family members might not be able to attend for financial reasons, so we chose to invite only two close friends as witnesses and not have our families there.
My family is OK with our decision, but his family is not pleased. They have been calling him constantly and telling him to change our plans and accommodate them, and frankly, we are sick of it. We know why they're upset, but at the same time this is our day and they should respect our decision.
How can we get them to be more understanding and less disrespectful about how we want our wedding? Please help, because we don't know what else to say to them. -- SOON TO BE NEWLYWEDS
DEAR SOON TO BE NEWLYWEDS: It appears your fiance's family considers weddings to be more about the joining of families and less about the wishes of the individuals involved. They expected to be included, and are hurt because they weren't.
A way to explain your decision would be to make it less about yourselves and more about the fact that you knew some family members could not afford to make this trip, so you plan to have a reception when you return and include everybody.