DEAR ABBY: We are part of a group of couples who meet monthly at one another's homes to play cards. We usually play in the evening from 7 to 11 with the hosting couple providing light refreshments and dessert. Many years ago, one couple designated December as "their" month to celebrate New Year's Eve. We start earlier with a meal and end after midnight.
The issue is that it has lost its appeal. Many of us would prefer not to be out on that particular night. How do we, as a group, let them know we no longer want to have game night on New Year's Eve without hurting their feelings? They tend to be a sensitive couple. -- PARTIED OUT IN OREGON
DEAR PARTIED OUT: Unless one of you is willing to be the messenger and speak for the rest of you, you should tell this couple as a group -- well before the end of the year -- that you would prefer not to be out on a night when many of the drivers on the road have been drinking. It's a valid reason.
While the New Year's Eve card game may have become a tradition, times change, and as people mature they tend to make more mature decisions. The one you're making ranks high among them.
P.S. There should be no hurt feelings if you suggest that the card game take place at some other time.