DEAR ABBY: I married a wonderful man seven years ago, and we had a happy marriage. One morning last January, he told me he no longer loved me and was moving out to live a life on his own. I have been devastated over this. At his request I quit work to stay home and be a housewife, and I have not worked in six years. I am 50 and am having a hard time dealing with this.
I know I need to find a job so he won't have to continue paying all my bills and his own, but I have been very depressed and I think it shows through when I go on interviews. He wants me to take a couple of college courses to brush up on what I used to do in the work force.
The only thing I want is to have my husband come home to me. We still see each other every other week and communicate daily through e-mails and phone calls. I still feel that he loves me, and that is what makes this so hard. He comes to have dinner with me on Saturday nights, and when he leaves he hugs me tight -- but still leaves. I don't know what to ask him about what his final plans are. He hasn't asked for a divorce, and he knows I don't want one. What should I do? -- HEARTBROKEN IN EVERETT, WASH.
DEAR HEARTBROKEN: Ask your husband for a full and complete answer about why he left you. Clearly, there are still strong ties between you.
Counseling will help you both communicate more clearly about what happened to your marriage. Once you have some straight answers, you will have a better idea of what you need to do next. In the meantime, my advice to you is to contact a licensed marriage and family therapist, but do nothing further.