DEAR MISS MANNERS: While my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years and I were out celebrating my birthday with our combined family, he ran into some old friends who were dining out at the same place.
My boyfriend does not introduce me to people when he stops to talk with them. He tells me he cannot remember their names and does not want to offend them. However, I feel offended that he does not care to include me in.
Perhaps I'm too soft? Later, while we were all eating, this woman came over and said she wanted a picture with my boyfriend. I felt like an outsider, since I had no idea who this was. She was laughing and insisting on getting a picture. My daughters and I had to stand up in order to let him out of the booth. I then helped take the picture, and she was off.
I then asked my boyfriend who she was. He said she was family to his ex-girlfriend but could not remember her name. That was his reasoning for not introducing me. I felt it was very rude. He didn't want to hurt her feelings by not remembering her name, so he left me out.
What about my feelings? Is it wrong to like to feel honored by him?
GENTLE READER: What about having feelings for someone who has trouble remembering names? Miss Manners does, and can rescue the gentleman.
Presumably he remembers your name. And if not, you have a worse problem than the one you reported.
Teach him the trick of saying the name he does know with "May I introduce ...?" as if the other person is in the needs-no-introduction category (which doesn't exist, but never mind that for now).
But wait -- why aren't you rescuing him? You need only stand up and introduce yourself instead of hanging back, feeling insulted. Just remember to keep looking at the stranger, not back at your beau, as you wait for the name to be supplied.
(Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website, www.missmanners.com; to her email, dearmissmanners@gmail.com; or through postal mail to Miss Manners, Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)