DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a feeling that my best friend is lying to me about still seeing her ex. They were together for quite some time, and while he did several awful things to her over the course of their relationship, the final straw for her was when she found out he was cheating with one of her classmates. She cried over him for days and swore she would never speak to him again. That was about two months ago.
We each have access to location services on the other’s phone, so I can see everywhere she goes. Most nights -- when she leaves her location on -- I can see that she’s at his apartment complex. I understand that in the grand scheme of things, it isn’t really my business, but that’s not how our friendship works. We’re always supposed to be 100% honest with each other and promise not to judge. While I wouldn’t approve of them being back together, it does hurt that she doesn’t think she can tell me about it. Should I ask her directly? I’m scared to overstep and cause a rift. -- Suspicious
DEAR SUSPICIOUS: Your friend is probably worried that you will judge her. Ask her if she is OK. Ask if she is seeing her ex again. Encourage her to talk about what’s going on in her life. Suggest that she spend some time alone so she can sort through her feelings. Remind her that you are there for her -- always.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)