DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have become dysfunctional, and I don’t know how we can come back from it. We have been married for three years. We were discussing divorce until we found the root of our problem -- my husband wanted to see another woman and still be with me. I couldn’t imagine being without him, so we opened our relationship; we both had outside relationships. I have trouble keeping other relationships going once I tell them about my open marriage with my husband; every time I get serious with someone, they ask me to leave him, and I end up dumping the guy. This open marriage is not working for me. I want to close our marriage, but I’m afraid my husband will not want to. I fear that this is the end of my marriage, and I am not ready. How do I prepare myself for my marriage to end? -- Closing My Marriage
DEAR CLOSING MY MARRIAGE: It’s time for a sit-down with your husband. You have to be upfront and direct with him. You never wanted an open marriage. The only reason you agreed to it in the first place is because you love your husband and wanted to save your marriage. You have now tried it. Remind him that you have met more than one man who wants to be in a monogamous relationship with you, but you would rather be with him. Ask him if he is willing to close your marriage and be totally devoted to you. If he is unwilling, you will have to decide whether you can live with that -- or leave.