DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been seeing this guy for about a year now, and I have brought up the fact that he has not taken me out on a date yet. He always tells me that he will plan something, but he never does. He comes to see me, but all we do is hang out in his car and eat and talk. It is starting to become predictable and boring. I don’t want to do that all the time.
He complains about not wanting to spend extra money on going out. But not all dates require you to spend money. So I made it clear that if he does not want to go out and do something, then I don’t want to see him. I feel like he is never going to plan anything, and I am just wasting my time. Should I stick it out for a little bit longer to give him a chance, or should I just keep the focus on myself and see other people who are willing to do that for me? -- Need Fun
DEAR NEED FUN: Before dumping him, plan some activities and invite him to participate. He may be happy to do something fun, but he may not have ideas. His attentiveness counts for something. See if he is willing to expand his horizons by following your lead. If he refuses or really cannot afford it, you will have to decide if car dates are enough.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)