Sense & Sensitivity by Harriette Cole

Reader Trying to Talk Friend out of Plastic Surgery

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend wants to get plastic surgery, and I am completely against it. I know it's her body and her choice, but in my opinion, voluntarily going into surgery is purposefully risking her life. I keep trying to talk her out of it, but she's strong-willed and wants to get the procedure done. Nothing is wrong with her. She just wants to be aesthetically pleasing. I am worried that something will go wrong, and I don't want to lose her. -- Anti-Plastic Surgery

DEAR ANTI-PLASTIC SURGERY: As someone who had three nonelective surgeries back-to-back when I was in elementary school, I totally understand your apprehension about elective plastic surgery. You are not wrong to be concerned. There are instances when people have had complications, including death, as a result of surgery -- think Joan Rivers and Kanye West’s mom Donda.

That said, I have spoken to a number of plastic surgeons about how they work, and I do know that the level of preparedness that is required is significant. This includes a complete patient workup to ensure that her or his body is in good enough health to undergo surgery. Though things can go wrong, it is a rare occurrence.

Stop trying to convince your friend of anything. You have already clearly expressed your opinion. It is her life. Whether or not you like her choices, she gets to make them. Instead of being doom and gloom, encourage your friend to be in optimal health so that she will be as ready for the surgery as possible. You can also encourage her to research the aftermath and recovery period expectations. That is being a good friend.