DEAR HARRIETTE: I graduated from college more than 20 years ago, and I’m not the girl who goes to homecoming, though I stay in touch with a few close friends. Anyway, one of my college friends reached out to me the other day to say that she is coming to my city and she wants to know if she can stay with me for a week. I have not talked to this woman for about 15 years. Yes, we were close back in the day, but this is an odd request that makes me feel uncomfortable.
I am happy to show my friend my city when she comes and to hang out a little, but I am not interested in hosting her in my home. I live in a small apartment and am a single mom. I do not want to disrupt our life for someone I haven’t been in touch with for years. How do I handle this? -- Throwback Request, Las Vegas
DEAR THROWBACK REQUEST: You live in a place that is popular for vacations. Your former college friend clearly wants to visit Las Vegas, and it sounds like you seemed to be the ticket for her to be able to make it happen. That said, you do not have to be her hotel.
If you like this woman, it’s great for you to tell her that you will be happy to see her while she is in town. You can offer to show her around one day or meet up for dinner. But don’t feel bad about telling her that she cannot stay with you. Just say no.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)