DEAR HARRIETTE: My parents were never married, but are no longer together. Soon after they separated, my dad got married to another woman whom I like and get along with. I think they are great together and make each other happy.
Recently, my dad has been hinting to me that my stepmom wants to have or adopt a child. I can't even begin to explain how against the idea I am. My dad is 56 years old with three grown children -- he should not be having another child at this point in his life! I know the push must be coming from my stepmom (she is significantly younger than my dad). How do I talk him out of this? -- Dad Too Old for Another Kid, Roanoke, Virginia
DEAR DAD TOO OLD FOR ANOTHER KID: This is your dad’s decision. He has married a woman who wants children. It is natural for him and his wife to consider this seriously. This weighs heavily on his heart, I am sure. Stop trying to force his choices. Instead, tell him your concerns, and ask him if he has made a plan. Ask if he has created a will and other safety precautions in case this new child outlives him. Ask about what his plans are for you and your siblings. Do your best to be happy for him. He sacrificed a lot for you. Let him know you appreciate him and want him to be happy. You can tell him that you are worried about what it may all mean. Ask him to think it through very strategically before deciding.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)