DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been working with the same attorney for many years. He’s kind of an all-around type of attorney. I have a different need now that my husband and I are considering divorce. We need an expert to help walk us through options, and so far we haven’t made any headway. Our breakup is sad but not acrimonious. It’s time to move on, and we agree on that. We do have some assets, including our home and retirement funds, etc. I think I need an expert lawyer to help me handle this. How do I tell my attorney? I don’t want to hurt his feelings. Using someone else almost feels like being involved in two divorces at once. -- Making Choices, Miami
DEAR MAKING CHOICES: Consider your attorney an asset right now. Tell him what’s going on and ask him for a referral. You need an expert divorce attorney. If he is a generalist, he knows already that this is not his area of expertise. If he offers to handle your case for you, tell him that you want and need an expert on divorce law. You need someone skilled at navigating division of resources, and you hope that he can make a few recommendations. If he doesn’t take this well, that’s on him. As a professional, he will likely be sensitive to your circumstances and introduce you to the most appropriate attorneys he knows.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)