DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend, who is an artist, gifted me a very large painting. This painting is of an ugly fish, and it's 6 feet across. I like to keep my walls bare, so she knows I have the space to hang it. Honestly, I think this could traumatize guests and does not suit me at all.
Do I have to hang this painting? Do I have the obligation to tell her why I won’t display it? -- From the HeART, San Diego
DEAR FROM THE HEART: Ah, you are entering tough territory. If your friend visits your home, which it sounds like she does, you should come clean. Thank her for her generosity, and then admit that you do not hang art on your walls. You like a clean palate; therefore, you really cannot accept her gift. Point out that you would feel terrible storing it away when, clearly, it is something that she spent time and creativity making. If she suggests leaning it against the wall or otherwise presses for you to try it out -- “Hey, you might like art on your walls after all!” -- you will have to confess that while you see her creativity, you are a little frightened by the fish and do not feel comfortable living with it in your space. Your friend is an artist. While her feelings may be hurt, she will have to understand that not everybody is going to fall in love with her work.
(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)