How do you decide when enough is enough?

As I write this, I'm waiting for a phone call from a friend who is struggling with that very question, as her young dog fights against an illness no one can figure out, even in the teaching hospital of one of the best veterinary schools in the world, at the University of California, Davis. She is three hours from home, exhausted from the driving and the worry.

Last night, she knew she was losing the battle. We talked about her crashing on my couch, to spare her the long drive home, but she went home anyway. I think she really didn't want to be with anyone, preferring to use the time on the road to collect her thoughts, and to spend a few hours in her own home, with her other dogs, gathering courage for the decision she's having to make now, after the long drive back

Let him go, or keep fighting for his life? I wish I had the answer for her, but it's one that each person must find for herself, because the answer is often different for every one of us. Different, too, depending on the situation.

Still, I guess the years have brought me enough sad experience that I have my own set of guidelines to help me with my decisions in such times. The most important among them? I try to remain very clear in my understanding of who will benefit from the decisions I make, and I try very hard to make sure it's always my pet. In other words: everything to maintain or improve quality of life, and nothing to simply prolong it.

It was so easy with Andy, who lived to be almost 16 and died the way he lived, always graceful and always in control. His decline was steady but oh-so gradual, and his end was swift. One day he was happily demanding his short daily walk, and the next he was in heart failure, asking to be set free. In a room surrounded by those who cared about him with my hand caressing his muzzle, he left quietly with the help of his veterinarian.

Although it seemed that I made the decision, the truth is that Andy did.

For Benjamin, age 9 in a cancer-prone breed where 10 is an average lifespan and every year past that a gift, I fear the final decision will not be so easy. Ben is galumphing through his senior years in the way that he has bumbled happily through his entire life. No graceful decline for him, just one crisis after another, with periods of seemingly robust health between them. For a 9-year-old dog, he acts surprisingly like a 9-month-old puppy, as brainlessly goofy as can be.

In the last few months, he has needed no fewer than three major medical interventions. First, he pulls an economy-sized container of dried onions off the counter at my brother's house and eats them all, spending a week at the veterinary hospital with a near-fatal case of the resulting anemia caused by his peculiar tastes. Then he has one surgery then another for some questionable lumps whose positioning under his front leg were causing him to be a three-legged dog.

He has kept me worrying -- and wondering. Will he recover from the onions? (He did.) Are the tumors benign? (They were.) Will he walk and run normally again? (He does.) What next? (No one knows, but with Ben, I'm certain whatever comes next will be equally dramatic.)

How will I know when it's time? How does anyone? I close my eyes and say a prayer that Ben's time is a long time coming, and then say another for a beautiful young dog and the friend who is probably now making the decision anyone who has ever loved a pet dreads, knowing how hard it is, and how very much it hurts.

THE SCOOP

If your child was lucky enough to get a pet over the summer, be sure that the responsibilities of caring for that pet don't get lost in the shuffle of new experiences and activities that come with a new school year. Help your child find time for the humdrum but essential duties of pet care, from feeding and grooming to cleaning cages and picking up the yard.

For dogs, especially, encourage children to fit in exercise. A walk or a game of fetch is good for both child and pet. And regular activity will help pets to better deal with the stress of a schedule change and having to spend more time alone.

PETS ON THE WEB

When my friend Christie Keith, who's an editor at Pet Hobbyist (www.pethobbyist.com), decided to jokingly launch a write-in California gubernatorial campaign for her dog Skye, a lovely Scottish deerhound, I happily gave my endorsement. In return -– this is how politics works, I suppose, one hand washing the other -– she promised to make my dog Heather his running mate.

The campaign, which won't much worry the front-runners, can be found on her personal Caber Feidh Web site (www.caberfeidh.com). Not interested in California politics? Can't blame you, really, but you should still visit Keith's site for the significant collection of information on alternative and holistic care for dogs and cats.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: Do you need another tip for helping pets lose weight? Our veterinarian suggested mixing rice cakes in with our dog's canned food. When I couldn't find plain rice cakes in our local supermarket, I substituted puffed rice cereal. Our vet also recommended substituting rice cakes for some of the reduced-calorie biscuits the dogs get. -– C.B., Mays Landing, N.J.

A: Yes, puffed-rice products (read the label to avoid sugar, fats and excess salt) are a great way to fill up pets with fewer calories and make a great substitute for dog treats, as do baby carrots.

I've written before about adding canned pumpkin (pure pumpkin, not pie filler) or green beans to your pet's reduced ration of pet food as another strategy.

How much should you reduce your pet's ration? Read the suggested feeding amounts on the label for the weight your pet should be (not the weight he is), and then reduce that amount by a quarter or even a third. Then increase the volume by adding the fillers –- pumpkin or green beans.

Be advised that it's a good idea to have your pet checked out by your veterinarian before starting any weight-loss program. This is especially important in obese cats, who are at risk of contracting a lethal disease if forced to reduce too quickly.

Q: We recently purchased Penny, a 2-year-old female Pomeranian, from a man who had just sold her mate and her puppies. Penny seems to like her new home and has been a sweet little pet for us. However, after three weeks, she still doesn't like other people coming to our home.

Our last dog was also a Pom and was friendly to everyone, even total strangers. Do you think Penny will always be somewhat suspicious? Is there any way we can encourage her to accept our friends and family and not bark at them? Also, I'm afraid that taking her to be spayed will further traumatize her. Should I wait? -– N.T., Fair Oaks, Calif.

A: Easy one first: As long as your dog is healthy, there's no reason to delay the spay. So call today.

Dogs, like people, vary in their personalities, although their personalities are fairly predictable by breed. You can be relatively certain that when you adopt, say, a golden retriever that you're going to get a dog who likes strangers, and that when you take in a Sheltie, you're going to end up with a pet who is devoted to family but not very friendly to visitors.

Having done rescue work with Shelties and having known many goldens, however, I can assure you that early socialization, or lack thereof, can alter these basic breed traits, producing shy goldens or helping Sheltie wallflowers become more comfortable around strangers.

Pomeranians are usually very bold dogs, especially considering their small size. But it may be that yours was never properly socialized during the formative periods of her puppyhood, or she is from lines that tend toward shyness.

Be patient in encouraging her to better tolerate guests. Teach her basic obedience to control her barking and build her confidence. Have your company help by not forcing themselves on her, and by rewarding any interest she has in them with gentle praise and treats. If in the end, however, she never much warms up to strangers, accept her as she is and be grateful for her loving demeanor toward her immediate family.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com. You can also read her frequently updated Web log or view her column archives at www.spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

When it comes to attitude, there's nothing like a terrier.

Dog-show judges love terriers for their showy in-your-face demeanor, but many pet lovers would find them difficult to live with, were it not for the fact that most of the dogs are small and endlessly entertaining.

Terriers are flat-out fun to be with, which is why these breeds are among the most recognizable and popular of all purebred dogs.

The terriers should be looked at as two separate groups, for the purpose of considering if one of these breeds is right for you.

-- Classic terriers. These are what most people think of when they think "terrier," mostly wire-coated breeds such as the cairn terrier and miniature schnauzer. These dogs are designed to fit into tunnels and battle their prey underground.

-- Bull-and-terrier. The second group contains those breeds that resulted from crossing bulldogs and terriers to produce animals that are as solidly built and heavily muscled as the bulldog, but with the terrier's classic tenacity and boldness. These breeds, commonly but incorrectly lumped under the name "pit bull," were developed to fight other dogs for "entertainment."

You'll find great pet potential in both groups, but you do have to be especially cautious when considering one of the bull-and-terrier breeds.

Classic terriers are tireless, plucky and stylish. And they're sturdy enough to be a child's pet if they're well-trained and socialized. Other common behavior problems come straight from the terrier's background as a vermin hunter: They dig and they bark. Some of these dogs are also difficult to train-out of marking territory inside the house. If you get a terrier, don't forget to budget for grooming: The wiry coat of most terriers is easiest to manage with regular attention from a professional groomer.

The bull-and-terrier breeds -- the American Staffordshire terrier, bull terrier, miniature bull terrier and Staffordshire bull terrier are the American Kennel Club versions -- have gotten some bad press in recent decades, and that's a shame, because these dogs were considered to be among the best dogs for children for generations. If you want one of these breeds, it's essential that you buy the puppy from a responsible show breeder or adopt a temperament-tested adult from a reputable shelter or rescue group. That way you'll avoid dogs with aggressive tendencies and end up with a calm, sensible dog with an easy-care coat who will provide your family with years of outstanding companionship.

Everyone knows of the most popular of the terriers, such as the Parson Russell (commonly known as the Jack Russell), the West Highland white or the Scottish. But I've always found it worthwhile to look into breeds that aren't so popular. They're not as likely to have the health and temperament problems associated with overbreeding. Here are three terrier breeds that are worth a good look:

-- Border terrier. This rough-coated charmer packs a lot of personality in less than 20 pounds. Some borders do well in competitive obedience work and agility, which marks them as a cut above most terriers in their eagerness to please.

-- Soft-coated wheaten terrier. Another of the more mild-mannered terriers, this time in a medium-sized package. Soft-coated refers to the breed's namesake fur which is silky and wavy, and wheaten notes the only allowable color, an eye-pleasing golden-brown that lightens as the dog matures.

-- Staffordshire bull terrier. The smallest of the bull-and-terrier breeds, this shorthaired dog is a solid, go-anywhere companion who typically loves the attention of people of all ages.

If you end up with a terrier or terrier mix, remember that socialization and training is essential to the development of these dogs into a reliable family pet. And so is a good sense of humor on your part, because a terrier will surely test it!

THE SCOOP

Some dogs who hate having their nails clipped will tolerate having their nails ground instead, using a pet-nail grinder or a handheld tool like a Dremel. Take time to get your pet used to the sound and the vibration of the tool, and be sure to work in short sessions, with lots of treats and praise.

The most important thing to remember when grinding is that nails can get very hot while you're working on them. Touch the grinder to the nail in very, very short bursts -- a second or two, at most -- to keep the heat from building up.

PETS ON THE WEB

Turtles and tortoises are wonderful pets -- entertaining, laid back and generally quiet. The California Turtle and Tortoise Club (www.tortoise.org) has been supporting fanciers of these pets since 1964, and their Web site reflects the depth of knowledge assembled over such a long time. The site offers information on setting up a suitable habitat, proper feeding and how to keep these pets healthy. You'll also find reviews of more books than you would ever have guessed have been written on the subject of these charming reptiles. Other can't-miss Web sites on the same subject area include Felice's World of Turtles (www.turtlebunker.com) and the New York Turtle and Tortoise Society (http://nytts.org).

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: A friend of mine got a new Labrador puppy. The puppy died suddenly, and an autopsy showed that the mushrooms that had sprung up in the yard were the cause. I'm sure a lot of pet owners do not know the dangers of those mushrooms. Would you please spread the word? -- S.G., via e-mail

A: This tragic story is one I'm heard many times over the years, and serves as a good warning to people with puppies that examining the house and yard for potential hazards is absolutely essential to the safety of your new pet.

Although curious puppies are probably most at risk to poisoning and other accidents, grown dogs aren't immune from life's hazards. Some dogs will eat anything that looks even remotely edible, after all.

After moving into a different house last December, I've had to patrol the yard constantly for mushrooms. The property has had a lot of trees removed over the years, and the rotting roots are perfect for the fungi.

Q: My cat is a great hunter and brings in creatures as often as five times a week. Usually I find her with them and manage to rescue the poor creatures before she kills them.

I missed one dead mouse, though, which left fresh blood on my oatmeal-colored carpet. I blotted, dabbed with water and then used commercial carpet cleaner, all to no avail.

On the Internet I found many remedies, all of which were more complicated than I wanted. Finally, I found one that used milk. Since I had some 2 percent milk in the refrigerator, I figured I'd try it. I poured the milk on, and it took care of the blood. Later, I found some blood that was long dried up, and the milk took care of that, too.

When the other cat spit up after eating grass, I used milk again and the stain came right up. Have you tried this? -- J.M., via e-mail

A: I have heard of it, but I haven't tried it. I think I will, though, since I have a rather large area on my white carpet that has been stained by the natural result of a dog who got into something he shouldn't have. (The white carpet came with the house, and is on my list of things to be replaced in the interest of a more pet-friendly decor.)

In the past, I have had good results with some of the enzymatic pet-stain cleaners, such as Nature's Miracle, Simple Solution and Anti-Icky-Poo.

Q: How do you keep your neighbor's cats off your car? -– N.W., via e-mail

A: Simple answer: You can't. As long as cats are free to roam they will be attracted to warm spots, such as the hood and engine compartment of a car that has recently been in use. If you can't garage your car and those paw prints are really getting to you, consider putting a cover over your vehicle.

Cooler weather will be here before we know it, and with it comes a need to be extra cautious when starting your car. Cats have been known to crawl into the engine compartment, falling asleep next to the warm parts. When the engine is started, a cat won't have time to escape before being injured.

When you start a car in cold weather, it's always a good idea to thump on the hood before getting into the car. The noise will startle the cat into fleeing before he can be hurt.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com. You can also read her frequently updated Web log or view her column archives at www.spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Gravity being what it is, even a creature made for flying spends a lot of time on his feet. This is why it's a shame that too many bird lovers give perches too little thought, forcing their pets to spend their lives on the plain wooden dowels that come as standard equipment with most cages.

The good news is that poor perch selection is easy to remedy, with lots of choices in specialty bird shops as well as bird-supply catalogs and Web sites.

There are three things to remember when it comes to perches: safety, variety and destructibility. Safety because ... well, that's kind of obvious. Variety because a wide array of shapes, sizes and material will help keep your bird's feet comfortable and healthy. Destructibility? Perches, like toys, are appropriate targets for the demolition urges that help keep birds busy, fit and free of boredom.

Here's what you'll find when looking for perches:

-- Wooden dowels. There's nothing really wrong with these standard-issue perches, but you can do better by your bird. While it won't hurt to leave a wooden dowel in the cage, take out the extras and add variety to your bird's environment.

-- Rope. Great stuff! Rope perches are both comfortable and entertaining. They're easy to clean, too. Just run them through the washer and dryer, or put them in the top rack of your dishwasher. One kind of rope perch -- the bouncy coil -- is truly wonderful, combining the best elements of a rope, a swing and a bungee cord. These coils are great fun your bird, and help to keep overweight "perch potatoes" more active.

The downside to rope is the possibility of your pet catching a toe on a frayed part of the perch or swallowing loose strands of the rope. Watch closely and replace these perches when the rope gets stringy.

Mineral: Almost every bird should have a mineral perch, also called a concrete or cement perch. The rough texture feels good underfoot, and the surface is great for helping to keep nails blunt and beaks clean and well-groomed (birds like to wipe their beaks against the rough surface).

Sandpaper perches are uncomfortable and have been known to cause foot problems, and so should be replaced with a mineral perch. Read the packaging material to choose the right diameter for your pet.

Plastic: Two kinds of plastic, acrylic and PVC, are both popular because of their sturdiness and relative ease of cleaning. If you choose acrylic, be sure to add other chewable perch options to your bird's environment. In general, acrylic is better than PVC, because the latter can too easily end up causing problems in a bird's stomach. (PVC perches can be great for supervised use, though.)

-- Tree branches: Most fruit and nut trees (almond, apple, prune and all citrus) are fine to use, as are ash, elm, dogwood and magnolia. If you can get your pruners on some manzanita, go for it -- it's a hard wood that can stand up to a lot of abuse. Leave the bark on all branches for your bird to peel off.

Cut the branches to fit in the cage, scrub with soap, rinse well and air-dry. Be sure to break off and discard any insect pods before putting the branch in your pet's cage.

Check all perches regularly, looking for wear and safety problems. Think of perches as replaceable cage furnishings, fighting boredom and keeping your bird comfortable and healthy. The extra labor and cost involved in keeping a fresh variety of perches in the cage is more than offset by the benefits of good perches for your bird.

THE SCOOP

More on overweight dogs ... My friend Jack Russell (honest, that's his name) is a volunteer with Australian Cattle Dog Rescue (www.cattledog.com/rescue), which from time to time fosters a dog who is in desperate need of a diet. His trick for getting dogs to think they are full on fewer calories is to replace a portion of the pet's regular ration with fiber, such as canned pumpkin (plain pumpkin, not pumpkin-pie filling). You can accomplish the same thing with green beans (watch the label: no salt, no sugar) or even beets. This strategy means more yard cleanup, but it's a safe way to gradually reduce a dog's girth without making your pet unhappy.

PETS ON THE WEB

When I first read about the Animal Planet's two gritty reality shows about humane officers, I couldn't bring myself to watch. The very idea of following the officers in Detroit ("Animal Cops") and New York City ("Animal Precinct") as they investigated cruelty cases was not my idea of entertainment. And yet, I got hooked. The Animal Planet Web site (http://animal.discovery.com) offers episode guides and follow-up stories on the animals who were saved. The cable network has just introduced a second series in the "Animal Cops" line, following officers in Houston.

A correction: I provided the wrong address in a recent column for the online magazine -- The Daily Dog. It's www.thedogdaily.com, apparently since the more obvious addresses were already taken.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: My name is Gretchen. I am an indoor cat. My mom saw your article about the pros and cons of keeping a cat indoors all the time. She asked my opinion, and I agree wholeheartedly with you. I used to be a stray who got into a lot of trouble. I was attacked by a dog and was stranded in a tree for three whole days and nights before the SPCA rescued me. I had to have a lot of surgeries to fix the big rips in my back and rear end.

So having experienced both the outdoor life as well as the restricted-to-indoors life, I feel uniquely qualified to offer my opinion.

Therefore, here are my "Top 10 Reasons Why It Is Good to be an Indoor Kitty":

10. You never get lost, hurt or abused by mean people or dogs.

9. You are never hungry, thirsty or afraid.

8. The only thing you have to do to get food is to look cute.

7. You get to sleep safe and warm all night long in a nice, soft bed with someone you love.

6. You can get hugs and kisses any time you want.

5. You can get a lot of exercise just by helping your mom and dad with household chores (my personal favorite is cleaning out the refrigerator).

4. You feel needed because you are responsible for catching houseflies.

3. You can look out the window and say mean things to the birds, and they can't go after you and peck you.

2. You grow smarter because mom and dad are always talking to you.

1. You learn to write e-mail!

Would you share my list with other people who don't believe a kitty like me can have a good life indoors? -- G.G., via e-mail

A: Gretchen, you write well and you're smart, too. Maybe there's a job in your future as a pet columnist.

You and your mom are lucky to have each other, and your list about sums things up. Cats can indeed be happy indoors if people put some effort into making the home interesting with scratching posts, toys and lots and lots of love.

Q: While the people who allow their cats to roam free outside are not doing them any favors, I would like to point out that people who allow their dogs to run free are also part of the problem. Free-roaming dogs are not only a danger to cats, they can also injure or kill people, livestock and wildlife.

Several people in our neighborhood have reported being menaced by the same two dogs that killed my neighbor's cat. -- K.R., via e-mail

A: The issue of free-roaming dogs has already been addressed, by law. While the decision to let cats roam is largely left up to the owner (except in those relatively few places with leash laws for cats), almost every municipality has laws against letting dogs out without supervision.

While there's still plenty of debate among well-meaning, caring people about letting cats roam, there's no debate where dog lovers are concerned. Responsible dog lovers do not allow their pets to roam the public streets.

Loose dogs are a danger to other animals, to people and to themselves. Anyone who turns a dog out to roam is almost certainly breaking the law, and should be dealt with accordingly.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com. You can also read her frequently updated Web log or view her column archives at www.spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600