If you have a dog who urinates when you scold him or greet him, chances are you are not dealing with a house-training problem. Rather, your dog is exhibiting a behavior the experts call "submissive urination" -- and you'll need a positive, no-punishment approach to get your pup to dry up.

It helps to know what sets this behavior apart from poor house-training. That means learning a little about canine body language, the way dogs and wolves communicate with one another.

Although dogs are domesticated, they still have a lot in common with their wild relatives. Dogs adjust to being members of our families so well because, like us, they have evolved to feel comfortable within a social structure. For dogs and wolves, the family is the pack, and to live harmoniously within it, they need to share a common language that allows some pack members to establish higher rank than others. If fighting settled all disputes, the pack members would soon be so chewed up they wouldn't be able to hunt. So instead, dogs and wolves use ritual behaviors to establish and reinforce pack order.

Submissive urination is one of those behaviors. A lower-status animal will crouch in the presence of more dominant pack members and release a little urine to signal that he accepts his place. He may even roll over on his back and then release urine. The behavior that so annoys humans is perfectly acceptable -- and understandable -- among dogs and wolves.

Among pet dogs, the behavior is more common in puppies and youngsters, and in some breeds or mixes known for their gentle, shy or anxious natures. Dogs who have been abused may also urinate submissively. In these dogs, the message they're trying to convey is heartbreaking: Please don't hurt me anymore! While some dogs urinate when confronted by anyone, even in a friendly manner, others react submissively only when scolded, or when approached by what they see as a particularly intimidating person, such as a man who's very tall or has a deep, booming voice.

Before starting to work on correcting submissive urination, have your pet checked out by your veterinarian to make sure there's no medical difficulty either at the root of the behavior or contributing to the problem. Some medical conditions may make urine-control difficult, and if that's the case, your pet will need to be made healthy before training can be expected to have much of an effect.

Never punish a dog for submissive urination, not only because it's ineffective, but also because it can make the problem worse. Instead, resolve to keep interactions low-key and upbeat, and gently reward your pet for proper greeting behavior -- docile and dry.

When greeting your pup, work to be less dominant. Keep your voice low and quiet, don't make direct eye contact, and come down to your dog's level to lessen your height. Crouch rather than bend at the knees so you don't loom over your dog.

Obedience training is a good confidence builder. So teach your dog to sit and shake hands, and ask for and reward those behaviors when you greet your pet. Since some dogs find a pat on the head intimidating, reward your dog by petting him under the chin, or by scratching him on the chest.

Make sure all family members handle the dog properly, and ask visitors to do the same.

For many young dogs, the problem will resolve itself as they mature, although you can speed things up by working to build your pet's confidence and trust. For other dogs, especially those who've been abused, training may be a frustrating and long-term process.

Correcting submissive behavior might take some time. But with patience, consistency and kindness, you can usually resolve the behavior -- and gain a happier, more confident pet in the bargain.

PETS ON THE WEB

No two cats are alike, but they do seem to fall into a few personality categories. Some are mellow, some always on the go. Some are outgoing, while others spend most of their lives in hiding. A recognition of these differences is one of the best things about www.CatToys.com, which offers suggestions for playthings based on the personality of each individual cat. Best of all: The site offers a discount on the entire order to those shoppers who opt to donate a toy or two to a non-profit shelter or rescue organization.

THE SCOOP

The wide range in size of pet birds suggests that keeping some species together is just asking for trouble. If forced to choose just one bird that doesn't mingle well, avian experts will usually point to the grey-cheeked parakeet. The little bird with a big attitude is usually a sweetie with people but is always ready to rumble with other parrots. These cheeky little guys won't shy from picking a fight with a much larger bird -- which almost certainly leads to injury.

Pay attention to the sizes and the personalities of your birds, and be aware that while some might co-exist peacefully, others might need to be housed not just in different cages but in different rooms. Especially if one of your pets is the pugnacious grey-cheeked parakeet.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: I recently took my cat to get neutered. When the veterinarian noticed my cat was a male calico, he said, "Do you realize that you are sitting on a $50,000 cat?" Now I am curious. What should I do? Who should I contact? -- C.H., via e-mail

A: Gee, don't look at me. I certainly wouldn't give you $50,000 for your pet. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but despite your veterinarian's enthusiasm, I'm afraid there isn't any value to a male calico beyond that of a cherished pet.

How a male cat ends up as a calico is an interesting lesson in genetics. The gene that governs how the orange color in cats will be displayed is on the X, or female, chromosome.

Any cat, male or female, can be orange, but in males that color usually is expressed one way: in the tabby pattern, sometimes called a "ginger tom."

Females can be orange tabbies, tortoiseshells or calicoes. The last two are genetically similar, except that the classic calico has distinct patches of color (white, black and orange) while in the tortoiseshell the same colors are swirled together.

For a cat to be a calico or tortoiseshell, two X-chromosomes must be present, and that means in the vast majority of cases a calico cat will be female. When the calico pattern exists in a male, it's because the cat has three sex chromosomes, two X, one Y -- a genetic rarity. If both of those X-chromosomes carry the genetic instructions for calico or tortoiseshell markings, you're looking at one rare cat.

Approximately one calico in every 3,000 is male.

Q: I read your article about the dog scratching and the assumption that it was fleas. Our Australian terrier had the same problem, and we could not stop her scratching despite numerous flea medications. We took her to the veterinarian, who did a blood test. It turned out that the dog had a thyroid problem. Would you please share this information with the owner of the scratching dog? -- D.D., via e-mail

Q: For the person with a scratching dog, would you please let her know that the problem might be allergies? We had the same problem with our dog, and sure enough she is allergic to the same types of things that bother spring hay fever sufferers. -- S.M., via e-mail

A: You're both right. Skin problems are so pervasive in pets -- dogs especially -- that dermatologists are among the busiest of veterinary specialists. In my own defense, however, I must point out that I did caution the letter-writer that getting to the bottom of the problem might well require a trip to the veterinarian or even a referral to a specialist.

Still, I've been amazed over the years at how invisible fleas can be to some pet lovers. Using the fur-ruffling test, where I rake my fingers through the coat against the grain, I've seen the signs of infestation on many a "flea-free" dog.

Regardless, the point I should have made is that if a dog can't stop scratching, a veterinarian's help is needed. You can waste a lot of time and money guessing at a problem and throwing home or over-the-counter remedies at it -- all while your dog continues to suffer.

Bottom line: Nothing beats a spot-on diagnosis and proper course of treatment from a good veterinarian.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Recently I spent a weekend with a family that includes two cats, three geckos, a tortoise and one very charming Welsh corgi.

Surrounded by animals and the guest of animal-lovers, you can be sure I had a wonderful time. The sole exception came as a result of a comment by one of my friends that struck me as unfair and has bothered me some since.

"I put so much work into the raising of my dog," she said. "I'd never adopt an adult dog. How could you ever be sure that the people who had the dog before raised him right?"

That's the thinking that leaves perfectly wonderful adult dogs languishing in shelter runs. And it's just plain wrong, because plenty of these dogs would be wonderful pets, every bit as good as my friend's delightful corgi.

If you're also one of those who think only a puppy will do, think again. If you work with a shelter or rescue group that screens its dogs (or better yet, does some pre-adoption training) and if you're determined to start an adult dog off right, you'll end up with just as good a pet for far less work.

That's not to say there isn't any effort involved. Remember the saying: "You never get a second chance to make a first impression"? It works with dogs, too. Be a leader with your dog from the start. Doing so is easy and works well -- as long as you're consistent.

So ... choose an adult dog! And use these tips to get you both off on the right paw:

Leash-bonding. For an hour each night for the first week or so, attach your dog to you by looping his leash to your belt. Keep your hands off the leash and don't call him along with you -- just move about your house as you normally would. He'll start to learn that it's important to pay attention to where you are and to think that you and what you're doing are significant.

Sit for what you want. Your dog should get in the habit of sitting for the good things. Ask him to sit before putting down his food dish, petting him or snapping on his leash. He'll start to think all good things come from you, but only when he behaves as you ask. Never reward him for barking, for pawing at you or for pushing your hand up with his nose for a pat.

People first. In the dog world, the higher-ranking animal goes first. You want that higher ranking animal to be you. So your dog should eat after you do, and he should walk out a door after you do. Never let him run past you -- out of a car, into your yard, or into the park -- as if he owns the joint. He doesn't, and he needs to understand that.

People bed, dog bed. Let your new dog sleep in your room, so he can be near you. But make him sleep on a bed or in a crate. Your bed is a prime piece of real estate, and it should be yours alone during this transition period.

After your dog learns the house rules, you can loosen up a little and start spoiling your pet. That's because once a dog is properly trained, he'll know that sleeping on the bed or sharing a meal is a privilege, not a right.

My friends put a lot of work into raising their puppy, and they have a wonderful dog to show for it. But I, too, have well-mannered companions, two dogs I took in as adults who are now the joy of my life. And there are plenty more just like them, in shelters and rescue groups, just waiting for the chance to come home, at last.

PETS ON THE WEB

Puppy or dog, any new canine companion can benefit from training classes. The Association of Pet Dog Trainers is an organization whose members are committed to continuing education and to finding ways to train dogs that are easy on all involved - which means methods than are reward based, rather than punishing. The APDT's Web site (www.apdt.com) offers tips on finding a trainer, recommended reading and a searchable index to member trainers.

THE SCOOP

Cats get into -- and onto -- everything, which can make decorating your home a challenge, especially if you're fond of delicate collectibles. Although it's best to put your most fragile and valuable items in hutches or glass-fronted bookcases, you can get a degree of security for the rest with a product called Quake Hold, which is offered in either a putty or gel that seals objects to shelves and counters. Quake Hold should be available at your home center or hardware store, or through any number of Internet retailers.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q. I have a dog who was kept inside for 3 years. Now we have moved where the dog has to be in an outside pen. He has a nice house and a good-sized run. He seems happy, but my father-in-law says that we are inhumane. Are we? - K.W., via e-mail

A. Inhumane? No. But I don't think you're offering your dog a life that is a happy as it could be.

I'm not generally in favor of outdoor dogs. Dogs are pack animals, which means they need family as much as we do. Life in a pen is not much of a life for a social animal, so I guess in this I agree somewhat with your father-in-law.

Is there a way you can bring the dog back into the house and his family? I'd sure try if that's at all possible. If it's problem with house-training or destructiveness, find a trainer or behaviorist who can help. If you can't bring the dog inside, make sure he has variety of toys to keep him occupied while he must be contained. And get him out of that pen as often as possible. He needs, at minimum, a daily walk, and lots of fetch or other playtime with family.

Q. I give my lab mix carrots as a treat. She loves them, but is eating them OK for her? - L.O., via e-mail

A. Carrots are wonderful treats for dogs, high in fiber and low in calories. Don't hesitate to indulge her, within reason. In fact, many veggies make a wonderful substitute for store-bought treats, especially for those dogs who are battling the bulge.

Another treat that's easy on the waistline (and yes, dogs have a waist too, or at least, they should) is rice cakes. I buy the unflavored, unsalted mini variety, and the dogs love them.

My dogs have always loved vegetable and fruit treats. Carrots are a favorite, along with apple slices. For my dog Andy, though, tomatoes were his all-time favorite food. He'd break down any barrier to strip tomatoes off their vines, and for his birthday each June my neighbors would always give him a basket of cherry tomatoes.

I've thought about Andy many times since he died last January, and I know I'll be thinking of him again when the tomatoes start to ripen this summer.

Q. There has been an Amazon parrot flying around my neighborhood for the last couple of years. Can parrots really survive so far away from their natural habitat? - S. G., via e-mail

A. Depends on where you live. If you live in warm Southern California or tropical South Florida, the answer is likely to be yes. Both of those regions are well known for colonies of feral parrots -- former pets, most likely, now living as wild. Even in cooler, more northern climates, sightings of parrots gone wild are not uncommon.

Some areas consider feral parrots to be a threat to native species, as in the case of a Quaker (also known as Monk) parakeet. The bird's easy ability to thrive in the wild and its aggressive colonizing tendencies has led to the species being banned as pets in some jurisdictions, most notably the entire state of California. On a recent trip to Santa Ana, Calif., I didn't spot any Quaker parakeets, but I did see many other parrots in an older part of town -- and listened to their loud calls to each other at dawn and dusk. My hosts said wild parrots have been part of their neighborhood for as long as anyone could remember.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Never before have we had so many choices in shopping for our pets.

Everyone wants a piece of the pet-supplies pie these days, and with good reason: It's a multibillion-dollar industry that thrives in both good times and bad.

In recent years, pet superstores have popped up everywhere, with a bigger selection of supplies than were carried by the mom-and-pop stores of a generation ago. In the shadow of these behemoths, small retailers have had to find new ways to do business, offering services such as free delivery, superior pet-care advice, or niche products such as fancy collars, high-end toys and treats, and pet-themed products for people.

And then there's the convenience of supermarkets, where the emphasis is on age-old brand names and generic products. Pet supplies are one of the top categories in any grocery store in terms of shelf space, and grocery retailers and their suppliers have done a great deal in recent years to improve the quality of their pet supplies.

General discount retailers and warehouse stores are working hard to attract the dollars of pet lovers as well.

What about catalogs and the Internet? The boom in mail-order business hasn't missed the pet-supplies industry, with available catalog selections as varied as those of the pet superstores and as focused as those of high-end pet boutiques. Big retailers and niche marketers (offering such goods as dog-sports equipment and bird supplies) are both doing a decent trade on the Internet.

And don't forget the little guys! A lot of the most creative and attractive merchandise for pets is handmade in small quantities, such as pet collars, leashes, and all manner of clever, well-made toys for all kinds of pets. Small retailers, crafts fairs, online auctions and pet shows are good places to look for these items.

If you're already overwhelmed by your choices, let me add one more: Buy used! You don't always have to think "new" when you need pet supplies. Many a top-quality cat tree, dog carrier or bird cage has turned up at a yard sale at a fraction of the new cost. So keep your eyes open at such sales for these big-ticket items because it may pay off for you and your pet.

Remember that the final determination of suitability for any product, no matter where you buy it or how much you pay, comes down to two things: First, is it safe for your pet? And second, does your pet like it? A product that's dangerous or that your pet ignores is no bargain at any price.

With so many choices, does it matter where you buy your pet supplies? For me it does. I consciously choose those retailers that put the idea of helping animals into company policy. I prefer to patronize companies that support animal charities at the corporate level, and that offer space at the store level for local groups to adopt out homeless animals.

Likewise, I shop at locally owned pet-supply stores that have owners who are actively supporting community efforts to make life better for animals and those who love them. I even seek out people who don't have stores at all, such as the artisan in my area whose braided leather collars are as durable as they are gorgeous, and who shows by her pet-centered activities such as teaching obedience classes that she loves animals.

Large or small, these retailers and suppliers are working to be successful and to do right by our pets. Sometimes I may pay a little extra to patronize them, but it always seems worth it to me to avoid those whose policies or products I neither support nor recommend.

PETS ON THE WEB

Hollywood Paws (www.hollywoodpaws.com) is a Web site dedicated to helping people get their pets into showbiz. How good an idea that is I don't know, but the Web site is sure interesting, with pictures and stories of pets whose owners have stars in their eyes. The site also offers a column by Anne Gordon, who trains animals for work in commercials, films and TV. There's also a quick test you can take to give you an idea of how bright and agreeable your pet is, and the potential for stardom. While looking at Hollywood Paws isn't likely to turn your dog into the next Lassie or give your cat a career like the famous Morris, it is a well-designed and entertaining site that's worth a look.

THE SCOOP

As we start to head into kitten season, it's good to remember that a big litter box may be too much for a little-bitty baby kitty. The sides may be too tall for a kitten to climb over easily, and the depth of filler that may be right for a full-grown cat may seem like the sand dunes of the Sahara for a youngster. An old 9-by-13-inch metal baking dish, permanently retired from cooking duties, can be a good first litter box for a kitten -- its low sides making it easy for babies to hop in and out of, and its shallowness dictates a level of filler a kitten can deal with.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We got our daughter a rabbit for Easter. She told her teacher, who just happens to have pet rabbits herself. The teacher sent home some material, including information on getting our rabbit spayed. Is this necessary? -- R.U., via e-mail

A: Since you have just the one rabbit, the surgery isn't really necessary to keep your rabbit from reproducing. But your daughter's teacher is right: Spaying or neutering is a good move, for a couple of reasons beyond preventing babies. Altered rabbits make better pets.

Female rabbits, for example, are at a high risk for uterine cancer, a leading killer of these pets over the age of 2. Spaying also removes the potential for common and potentially lethal reproductive-system infections. Besides extending your pet's life span, altering eliminates sex-related behavior problems. Sexually mature rabbits can be territorial or even aggressive, and may spray urine to mark territory.

Be sure you find a veterinarian with experience in treating rabbits, because anesthesia is generally riskier for rabbits than it is for dogs and cats. The House Rabbit Society (www.rabbits.org) offers a listing of rabbit-friendly veterinarians on its Web site.

Q: My husband and I were adopted by a pair of kittens last summer. We think they're brother and sister from the same litter, since they turned up together. They've both been neutered and declawed, and divide their time between the house and a large screened porch, where their litter box, cat tree, and food and water dishes are.

We're planning a three-week vacation in Europe this summer to celebrate our 30th anniversary, and the graduation from college of our daughter, youngest of three. Do you think a pet sitter would be a good idea for that length of time? We've had a neighbor look in on them when we've taken a weekend trip, but this is considerably longer. -- O.R., via e-mail

A: I don't suppose you could talk that youngest child of yours - you know, the one for whom you made so many sacrifices so that she could go to college -- into staying at your house while you are gone?

Failing that, I think your situation is ideal for a pet sitter. Although every animal is unique, cats generally are more comfortable staying in their own surroundings, as opposed to being temporarily relocated to a boarding situation.

For the length of time you're talking about, I'd be extremely reluctant to lean on the generosity of friends, family or neighbors, or to rely on the trustworthiness of a neighborhood kid. To be sure your pets are consistently well cared for while you're gone, I'd opt for a reputable professional service.

Professional pet-sitting services have come on strong in recent years, and many pet lovers use and love them. Not only will they drop in regularly and reliably to feed and fuss over your pets, but they can also water plants, turn lights on and off, and generally make your house look more "lived in" while you're gone.

If you're considering hiring a pet-sitting service, be sure to discuss services and prices beforehand so there are no misunderstandings, make sure that they're bonded and insured, and ask for references. Pet Sitters International, a trade association, offers member listings on its Web site, www.petsit.com. It's a great place to start looking.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600