As pet lovers, we always need to keep in mind one of the basic facts of life: Not everyone loves animals the way we do. And even those who do love animals can find the antics of other people's pets a little hard to bear at times.

If I didn't know this already, I was reminded recently by a trio of letters from people complaining about other people's pets: screaming parrots in an outdoor aviary, a tomcat who terrorizes the neighborhood's other felines, and a dog let out every morning to leave "gifts" on other people's lawns.

These pets have two things in common. First, they're doing what is only natural to them. Second, they have owners who aren't thinking about their neighbors. Pet owners who allow their pets to be nuisances are more than rude: They're also a threat to those of us who always want to have animals in our lives. Irresponsible pet owners provide plenty of ammunition to those who would be happy to see animals banned -- or at least highly restricted.

Responsible pet ownership is the best antidote for anti-pet sentiments. The good news is that it doesn't take a lot of effort to keep reasonable people happy. Here are the rules we pet lovers need to live by to keep things neighborly.

-- Keep 'em quiet. Barking dog or screaming parrots, the answer is the same: Keep your pets inside, especially at night and on weekend mornings. Pet lovers have a tendency to become selectively deaf, tuning out the racket of their own pets. Some people seem able to sleep through the barking of their own dogs. Although you may be able to manage such a trick, your neighbors shouldn't have to.

-- Keep 'em under control. The only way to accomplish this with cats is to keep them inside. The bonus for you: Your cat will live a longer, healthier life. Outdoor cats fight noisily for mates and territory (neutering helps, but not completely), pick up and spread deadly feline diseases, and are exposed to hazards such as cars, coyotes and cat-hating neighbors with traps.

As for dogs, keep them fenced or on a leash and off other people's property -- always. In public areas where it's OK for a game of fetch, train your dog to be under your voice control, or put him on a long lead instead. Never let him bother other people or pets.

-- Keep 'em clean. Pick up after your dog, whether or not it's required by local ordinance. I never understand why people who wouldn't think of tossing an empty cup on a neighbor's lawn think nothing of leaving something much more vile.

Don't step out of your house with your dog unless you have plastic bags in your pocket for cleanups. Pickup is easy. Put the bag over your hand like a mitten, pick up the poop and turn the bag inside-out with the mess inside. Pop the sealed packet in the nearest garbage can, and you're done.

The only way to keep your cat's mess out of your neighbor's flowerbeds is to keep him inside.

Sure, there are people won't be happy whatever you do. I have one fellow in my neighborhood who screams at me to keep my leashed dog off his lawn, even though we've never once set foot on it. Maybe he's a crank, or maybe he's sick of picking up after other people's pets. It doesn't matter. I just nod politely and show by example that I'm the kind of pet lover he should like having in the neighborhood. In time, maybe he'll lighten up.

Make the effort to be a responsible pet owner. Keeping your neighbors happy is the right thing to do, and it's the best way to protect your own interest in being able to spend your life with the animals you love.

PETS ON THE WEB

People who share their lives with turtles and tortoises know that cold weather means hibernation for these pets. This is a good time of year to check in on Felice's World of Turtles Web site (http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/felicerood) to make sure cold-weather care is proper for the pet's species and health status.

Felice Rood is a self-taught expert on these pets, and she keeps more than 100 of them at her Sacramento, Calif., home. Her Web site is full of care advice and entertaining stories of her own turtles and tortoises.

THE SCOOP

Keeping cats indoors keeps them out of harm's way, but it doesn't do much to keep their bodies exercised. If you have an indoor cat, set time aside for active games that will keep your kitty moving. Perfect for this purpose is getting your pet to chase a toy on a string, or using one of those commercial "fishing pole" cat toys.

Be sure you put string toys away when you're not there to supervise, though. Cats and kittens who end up eating string (or ribbon, dental floss or other similar material) can end up with an intestinal problem that may become life-threatening and may need to be surgically corrected.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We have a comfortable home, decorated very nicely. We have a small poodle, and one reason my girlfriend chose this breed was because poodles don't shed much hair.

My girlfriend's best friend, Deborah, has a well-groomed male golden retriever named Dakota. Deborah takes Dakota everywhere, including our home. Dakota is a nice dog, but he is big and hairy and likes to jump on furniture.

We really like Deborah (and, quite frankly, Dakota is nice, too). We don't want to hurt Deborah's feelings, but we don't want Dakota coming over -- he always leaves a mess!

How do we tell Deborah, without hurting her feelings, that she is welcome but the dog must stay out of the house? -- K.K., via e-mail

A: You have two options: Tell Deborah politely but firmly that you don't want her dog in your house, or invest in a case of lint brushes.

It's presumptuous of your friend to bring the dog without asking permission, especially since she must know how much you enjoy a clean and well-ordered home. If you go the "no Dakota" route, you might suggest an occasional meeting for all of you at a local dog park, especially since you like the dog when he's not on your furniture.

If you do decide to allow Dakota in your house, set down some ground rules. Suggest that instead of his jumping on the furniture, he stay on something washable, like an old bath mat. (Even I, crazed pet nut that I am, would never allow a dog of mine on the furniture in someone else's home, even though they sleep on the couches in my own.)

Assuming Dakota is bathed frequently enough so that smell isn't a problem, you should be able to throw the bath mat in the wash and whisk any stray golden hair up pretty quickly with a lint brush after a visit.

Do talk to Deborah right away. Problems like these can turn into petty resentments that eat away at the underpinnings of a friendship. Better you should have an open discussion of the problem and come to some sort of agreement right away than risk a friendship-ending blow-up down the line. If Dakota is like most golden retrievers, he'd hate to have any ill feelings on his account.

Q: Do dogs need sweaters in cold weather? -- S.P., via e-mail

A: Some dogs really are helped by sweaters. While those designed for cold weather, including such arctic breeds as malamutes and all-weather sheepdogs like collies, are just fine with the long, thick coats that come as standard equipment, other dogs can use a little help in wintertime.

Older shorthaired dogs fall into that category. Poor circulation and a lack of activity mean these guys are often cold, and a sweater would sure feel nice to ease the inevitable creakiness that comes from old age.

Dogs who are kept clipped, such as poodles, can also use some help in keeping warm. Left to its own devices, the poodle's curly coat would grow more than a foot long and provide ample insulation. But most people have their poodles clipped in a short, tidy style, leaving an insufficient coat to keep the animals toasty.

A final group of sweater-ready dogs: greyhounds. These lean, deep-chested dogs have minimal hair and a lot of exposed skin. They're always cold and appreciate the help a sweater offers in keeping warm. The same goes for their smaller relations, the whippet and Italian greyhound.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Thanksgiving is at hand, and the rest of the holiday season looms ahead. It's a busy time, but you need to make sure in the whirl of activities that you aren't ignoring any danger to your pets.

Every year at this time I offer a list of the most common holiday hazards for pets: feeding problems, foreign-body ingestion and accidental poisoning. The bad news is that many pets will end up at the veterinarian's office this holiday season. The good news is that yours won't be among them if you keep an eye out for these hazards.

-- Feeding problems. Your pet knows something special is cooking and he lets you know he's interested -- just look at those begging eyes! How can you resist slipping your pet a little something special: a big piece of turkey skin, a handful of chips with dip, some slices of salami? Resist, or your pet could be spending his holiday at the emergency veterinary clinic.

Foods too rich, too fatty or too spicy -- or anything your pet's not accustomed to -- can trigger a bout of intestinal upset. For some animals, the treat can trigger a serious inflammation of the pancreas or intestine, and that means a life-threatening illness.

What to avoid? Anything you wouldn't eat your pet should avoid, too. While a little bit of meat -- beef or poultry -- won't hurt and would be appreciated, steer clear of the fatty parts and the poultry skin, which also harbors fat.

No one's saying your pet shouldn't enjoy a special holiday meal, too, but limiting the kind and amount of special food will ensure that it is a treat -- not a trouble.

-- Foreign-body ingestion. Poultry bones may seem like the perfect gift for the pet who has everything, but do him a favor and save them for the soup. (Broth is a wonderful treat poured over your pet's regular food.) Even the largest turkey bones are prone to splintering, sending shards through the animal's intestines. Should one pierce through the lining, the result can be deadly peritonitis.

While cooked poultry bones are out, some beef bones can be safely substituted. Knuckle bones (for large dogs) and oxtails (for small ones) stand up to vigorous gnawing, providing your pet with hours of messy fun. Check at your meat counter for these inexpensive treats. Supervise your dog's chewing, and throw them out after a few hours of attention, or if they get broken into pieces that can be swallowed.

Some dogs prefer to eat bones rather than just chew on them, and if you've got one of those, keep an eye out to make sure the bones aren't causing internal problems. A pulverized bone can solidify like concrete in an animal's lower intestine, causing constipation and, occasionally, blockage that must be removed by a veterinarian.

The Christmas tree is full of hazards for dogs and cats. Tinsel can be an appealing target for play, but if ingested, it can twist up the intestines. This is a particular danger to cats and kittens, who seem to find tinsel -- along with yarn, ribbon and string -- especially appealing to eat.

Ornaments, too, are deadly in the mouths -- and stomachs -- of pets, and even the water at the base of the tree contains secretions that can at the very least cause a stomachache. Light strings are no good for chewing, and the whole tree can come down on the cat climbing in its branches. Some dogs may even be inclined to break the rules of house-training on a freshly cut tree -- why else, they reason, would anyone bring a tree into the house? The best way to handle the situation is by making the tree off-limits to your pets unless you're there to watch and keep them out of trouble.

-- Poisonings. Holiday plants such as mistletoe may look intriguing to your pet, but they're also toxic, as are the bulbs of the amaryllis plant. (Long the poster child for holiday poisoning, the falsely maligned poinsettia can be safely welcomed into the pet lover's home.) And before you share your holiday candy with your pet, be aware that chocolate is toxic to dogs, and may be deadly to the little dog who gets a good-sized piece. Again, the best cure is prevention. Keep all dangerous plants out of the reach of your pets, and keep the candy dish available to people only.

PETS ON THE WEB

Life-sized fiberglass cows are everywhere, painted in creative ways and raising money for charity coast to coast. Everywhere, that is, except Sun Valley, Idaho, where the folks took a hot idea and gave it a canine twist: The painted animals on display there are dogs -- Labradors, to be exact. The 35 slightly larger-than-life art pieces will be auctioned off Dec. 29, with proceeds going to charity. You don't have to be on hand to bid, or to look at these creative offerings: Just visit the Sun Valley Labs Web site at www.sunvalleylabs.net.

THE SCOOP

Some people have a much easier time deciding to spay their female pets than to neuter their males. While it's true that male pets won't surprise you by turning up pregnant, you'll find more than enough reasons to neuter your males, from both a health and temperament standpoint.

In dogs and cats both, neutering reduces the desire to roam, to fight and to engage in inappropriate marking behavior -- inside spraying for cats, leg-lifting for dogs. Health risks are also reduced. The tranquil, stay-at-home desire of neutered pets means you won't be paying to get them patched up after fights or accidents. And the overall risk of cancer is also diminished.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We're considering purchasing a leather couch. We have two indoor cats who have completely destroyed our fabric couch. We have given them a scratch post recently and although they use it, they still use the couch. We do not deter them from using the fabric couch.

In regard to the leather couch, we have heard that cats don't like leather and won't scratch it. But before we shell out the money for an expensive piece of furniture, I wanted your opinion. -- M.B., via e-mail

A: While it's true that cats prefer fabrics, especially those with a course woven texture, I wouldn't bet the farm on them not touching the new leather couch. Before you make such a huge investment, make a determined effort to convert your cats to using the scratching post.

First, make sure the post is adequate. Your cats need something they can stretch out on and really dig into, and that they can't pull over on themselves. For these reasons, I prefer to recommend a cat tree rather than a scratching post. Trees are taller, less likely to fall over, and offer room for two or more cats to scratch, play and nap. The cover should be a nubby, loose-weave fabric or a rough rope, like sisal.

Then make your current couch less attractive to scratching. Since you're tossing out that couch anyway, you don't need to be careful about saving what's left of the fabric. So cover all the areas on the furniture where your cats love to scratch with something they'll hate to touch --the sticky side of shelf-liner such as contact paper. Peel back the protective paper to reveal the sticky side, and secure the sheets sticky-side-out to the scratched areas with double-sided tape. Don't scrimp: Go for full coverage!

Next, move the scratching post beside your cats' most popular part of the couch. The idea is to give them a nearby alternative to putting their paws on their former scratching post -- your old couch. Play games with your cats on the post, such as encouraging them to chase a string toy, and give them food and treats for scratching in an appropriate place.

Be patient, because cats aren't keen on change. Once you notice your cats using the post (and not using the booby-trapped couch), you can very slowly -- like a couple feet a week -- move the post to a less prominent part of the room. (But don't move it so far away that your cats lose interest -- basements and garages are out!)

When you get your new couch, you can booby-trap it without marring the leather by mounting the sticky paper to sheets of cardboard and leaning them against the sides, corners and back of the new couch. No, you won't have to hide your lovely new furniture forever. The cardboard is to keep the cats from trying out the new couch, and it can come down once you observe that the cat tree is getting all the action.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Like most predators, cats have keen senses. Our lovingly spoiled and mostly domesticated former hunters get food served to them these days, often in fancy bowls. But that doesn't mean they've lost the senses their wild kin rely on to survive.

People and cats live in completely different worlds when it comes to our respective sensory perceptions. When you imagine things from your pet's point of view, you'll be able to better understand what makes your cat tick.

Consider the feline sense of smell, which is many times more powerful than a human's puny abilities in this area. Once you know that your cat is so much more sensitive than you are capable of being, you shouldn't be surprised that the litter box you think is "tolerable" may be offensive to your cat. Same goes for those perfumed litters: We may love them, but they can be strong to the point of overpowering to our keen-nosed felines.

Of course, the litter box is a relatively modern convenience, and the cat's sense of smell is good for much more than deciding when it's not clean enough. Smell also plays a role in the establishment of territory. Cats like things in their home range to smell like them, be they [be it?] people or furniture, and make them familiar by rubbing or scratching. The sense of smell is also important to free-roaming cats when it comes to finding prey, and in the determination of whether "found" food is safe enough to eat.

Dogs are scavengers who eat just about anything; cats are true predators. For them, fresh food, please, is their decided preference. Ever wonder why your cat turns up his nose at canned food that's been out a while? Simple: It doesn't smell right.

The sense of smell and taste are very closely connected in cats in part because the animals have a special anatomical feature called the vomeronasal organ, which allows them to process scent almost by tasting it. The organ is at the front of the roof of the mouth, and you can tell when your cat is using it: They open their mouths a crack and seem to be panting slightly. The facial expression that accompanies this behavior is so distinctive that it even has a name: the Flehmen response.

You can use your cat's well-developed sense of smell to your advantage if you're trying to entice a sick or just plain finicky cat to eat. If you warm your cat's wet food to just above room temperature before serving (about 85 degrees, or what we humans would call "lukewarm"), you'll make the odor more enticing, and so increase the appeal of the meal.

No matter what you do, though, you're not likely to get most cats interested in anything sweet. It's not for any lack in their sensory ability. Experts believe cats can identify foods that are bitter, salty, sweet or sour, although their appreciation of any of those qualities differs greatly from our own.

Not surprising, really, when you consider that were your cat to choose a gourmet meal, chances are he'd opt for a freshly killed mouse, hold the seasonings. Or maybe, knowing the skillful predator that lives in even the most pampered of pets, your cat would choose his meal live and easy to catch.

Dead or alive, a mouse is a meal preference no human would share. But then, our tongues also aren't adapted to clean meat off the bones of prey the way a cat's sandpaper-textured licker is. It all comes together so beautifully in the lithe, supple body of the perfect small predator.

When you think about how different cats and people are, it makes you wonder how we get along as well as we do. If nothing else, it should give you a sense of wonder at the superhuman senses of our most popular pet.

PETS ON THE WEB

I wish every chronic pet illness had a Web site as helpful and supportive as the one dedicated to feline diabetes (www.felinediabetes.com). Administered by a cat-loving physician, the site offers everything an owner needs (but maybe didn't think to ask the veterinarian) about caring for a pet with this disease. What is it like to live with such an animal? You'll find that here, along with tips on using syringes and monitoring your pet's sugar levels. A worthwhile read, without a doubt -- this is a site that's built with science but runs on love.

THE SCOOP

Winterizing your car or truck? Now may be the time to do it, but make sure when you're taking care of your vehicle that you're also watching out for your pet. The worry? Coolant made from ethylene glycol, a sweet-tasting liquid that can be lethal to your pet in dosages as small as a teaspoon, or less.

Safer alternatives exist to ethylene glycol, such as coolant made from propylene glycol. No matter what you use, though, be sure to clean up any spills promptly and thoroughly, and keep any stored product in leak-proof containers in a closed cupboard. If your pet laps even the smallest amount of coolant, see your veterinarian immediately. Your pet's only shot at survival is prompt treatment.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: Our puppy, a Lab mix from the shelter, is almost 4 months old now. She has a lot of energy, and sometimes we think we made a mistake in adopting her. But we know that puppies are a lot of work, and we're going to hang in there.

The biggest problem we have is that we can't get her to quit biting when she plays. It's really serious, to the extent that our 7-year-old son is afraid to play with the puppy now. Since we got the puppy for our son, this obviously is a bad situation. Can you help? -- N.N., via e-mail

A: Consider how human babies explore the world around them: They touch things, they grab things, and they taste what they grab. Puppies are much the same way, but since nature didn't equip them with fingers, they do their exploring with their mouths.

If you watch a litter of puppies play with each other, you might be surprised at how rough they can be. They nip -- hard. They grab hold of each other by the ears with needle-sharp teeth and pull. As puppies grow older, they learn from their littermates and their mother how to restrain those playful bites, which is one reason why it's so important to leave a puppy with his canine family until he's at least 7 weeks of age.

Some puppies don't get this critical early education, and some others are just slow learners. Others still are from breeds that are known to be "mouthier" than others -- retrievers are the classic example.

You can teach your puppy to keep his teeth to himself by attacking the problem from a couple of different directions. The first would be to redirect the behavior, giving your puppy a yummy toy and praising her for chewing on something that's not a family member.

Even as you're teaching the puppy what's OK to mouth, teach her how to leave family members unchewed by making the nipping unrewarding. Every time the puppy nips, cry "ouch" in a loud voice and immediately stop the play session. Turn away and ignore the puppy completely for a few minutes. Teach your son to do the same thing.

The message to get across: Play stops when she nips. If you're persistent and consistent, your puppy will get start getting the message soon and will learn to inhibit her bites.

If the behavior doesn't show any sign of ending, or if the biting seems more aggressive than playful, don't delay in asking your veterinarian for a referral to a behaviorist or trainer.

Q: Would you put in a word for greyhounds? There's a real need for homes for these dogs after their racing careers are over. Greyhounds are sweet, gentle and affectionate. They may be retired athletes, but they are committed couch potatoes. About three months ago, I adopted a sweet, loving 2-year-old greyhound. I am amazed at how mellow she is. -- B.W., via e-mail

A: I don't mind at all making the case for greyhounds. They're generally clean, quiet and easygoing, and they seem to be aware of how lucky they are to be in a loving home.

In adopting one, you need to work with a reputable rescue organization that'll match the dog with your household. One of the biggest problems: Some greyhounds -- but not all -- don't mix safely with cats.

A good place to start researching is the Greyhound Project Web site (www.adopt-a-greyhound.org). You'll find lots of information pro and con, as well as links to regional rescue groups.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600