A friend was telling me about a problem he'd had at his local fast-food outlet. An older, larger child in the play area was pushing around a smaller boy while the bully's parents looked on, oblivious.

The friend waited for the parents to do something about the problem child, and when that didn't happen, he went over to speak with them about removing their son. "They're just playing," the other dad said, and both men exchanged a few less-than-polite words before the bully's parents picked up their son and left.

Being the non-confrontational type, my first thought was to be amazed that no one ended up shot. My second was how much the story reminded me of my local dog park.

Since this is a pet column, it's not my place to comment about poorly behaved children or clueless parents. But ill-mannered dogs and their oblivious owners? That's another thing entirely.

Don't get me wrong: I'm a strong supporter of dog parks. A lot of the problems we have with dogs are caused by a lack of exercise, poor socialization or both. And I'm happy to see that an increasing number of communities are giving dog lovers fenced areas to unleash their pets.

Dog parks are run by peer pressure, and it's generally a good system. Most dog lovers know that having such areas is a privilege, hard-won and still considered experimental by many public officials. We come down hard on people who don't respect the rules, especially when it comes to picking up after their pets.

But what about the problems that are more about common sense and common civility? These things pop up now and then, thanks to people who may lack both.

The biggest lapse in common sense: leaving a choke collar on your dog after you take off the leash. Putting aside the frequent overuse and misuse of this piece of training equipment, every dog lover should realize that choke collars are not intended to be left on a dog without the leash attached. The moving ring can be easily caught -- on the tooth of another dog in play, for example -- and once that happens, the natural tendency of an animal to pull away from danger puts into play the natural tendency of the collar to choke when tightened. This situation is dangerous, both for the dog and for anyone who tries to free him, who may be bitten by the panicking pet.

Problems of the civility variety come from people who allow their dogs to annoy other pets or people. Sometimes a dog will just get it in his head that he's going to pick out one person or pet to pester. If your dog is ruining the enjoyment of the park for another user, get out your leash and call it a day, or at least engage your pet in a game of fetch on the other side of the enclosure.

Then there are the people who seem to have neither common sense nor common civility: the ones bringing dogs that get into fights. Dogs that are flat-out aggressive have no business being off-leash anywhere, including a dog park, but I'm a little more tolerant of those animals that now and then get wound up in play to the point of an altercation. The solution for these dogs is easy: Keep them muzzled. A wire box muzzle allows a dog to breathe easily and pant, but keeps the teeth out of play while the pet is getting the exercise he needs.

The problems in dog parks aren't that common, but they would be almost unheard of if people just used their heads. Being more careful and considerate is the best way I know to ensure that there'll be dog parks for our pets to enjoy for a long time to come.

PETS ON THE WEB

Want to keep up on the latest dog-related news from around the world? Then make it a point to visit The Scoop: Dogs in the News (http://dogsinthenews.com) on a regular basis. The Web site looks for dog stories of all kinds -- funny, quirky, irritating or just plain interesting -- and lists the links in reverse chronological order.

The take on the news is definitely pro-dog, as the editorial comments attached to many pieces make very clear. Each story offers a link to a discussion board, where visitors can add their opinions to the mix.

THE SCOOP

Looking for a non-chemical weapon in the fight against fleas? Chances are, two of the best are already in your home: a washing machine and a vacuum cleaner.

Washing pet bedding on at least a weekly basis will help to kill fleas of all life stages -- eggs, larvae and adults. Bedding that cannot be washed is a fertile breeding ground for generation after generation of fleas, so it's best to use beds that can handle wash-and-dry cycles with ease.

Regular vacuuming of areas where pets frequent also breaks the flea breeding cycle. Empty the canister immediately after use, to prevent your vacuum cleaner from becoming a flea nursery. If your cleaner uses bags, put in some flea powder or a piece of flea collar to kill the pests.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We have always had big dogs. But since my husband and I are in our 70s now, we decided that when our last shepherd died that having a small dog would be a better idea. A few months ago we got an adorable Maltese pup.

Cindy is a sweetie, and we love her. But we don't seem to be having much luck getting her house-trained. She just doesn't seem to get the concept, even though we've put her nose in the mess and spanked her. Help! -- C.M., via e-mail

A: Toy dogs are notoriously hard to house-train, but it can usually be accomplished with consistency, praise and lots of patience. Please notice that "punishment" is not on that list, so stop with the swat right now, and vow to never put your pup's nose in another mess.

The first step in house-training a toy breed, according to small-dog expert Darlene Arden, author of "The Irrepressible Toy Dog" (Hungry Minds Inc., $17.95), is to make sure your dog will feel safe in the outside spot you've chosen for her to use.

The act of elimination is one when a dog's guard is down, and when you weigh 10 pounds or less, it's important to feel that you're not going to be attacked. "They feel vulnerable," says Arden. "You need to find that one very safe spot for them." And keep the grass short so the dog doesn't feel as if he's hacking through a jungle, she adds.

Once your dog has that safe spot outside, you put your house-training plan in place.

"Feed on a schedule," says Arden, "and be aware of when the puppy has to go. You must take your dog out after he eats, after play, after any kind of stimulation.

"Take a very special treat and your happiest voice to the special spot. The moment the puppy's feet hit the ground, get excited." When the deed is done, says Arden, praise your pet and deliver the treat.

Limiting a dog's wandering in the house is also important. "I'm a firm believer in crate-training -- as a tool, not a punishment," says Arden. "A crate keeps a dog out of trouble when you can't watch him." Some trainers also recommend leashing your dog to you in the house while training, so the pet can't slip off unnoticed.

Mistakes are part of the learning process and should never be punished. "If you see the dog starting to go in the house, pick him up and run him to that special spot," says Arden, and praise when the dog finishes up outside.

If you want to solve this problem, you'll have to work at it consistently for a few weeks or more. It's worth it in the end, because then you'll have the companion you were hoping for when you brought home your puppy -- a bright, happy dog of a manageable size who knows how to do her business outside.

Q: As the temperature is heating up, so are truck beds. Many dog owners seem to be blissfully unaware of that, and they make their dogs ride in the back. Please help educate these idiots. -- N.B., via e-mail

A: Consider it done. Transporting a dog in the back of an open pickup is about the worst thing you can do in terms of safety and comfort. Aside from the problem of hot feet, dogs in pickups can be thrown from the vehicle, or sometimes will jump out if something catches their attention. Leashing your dog -- as required by law in some states -- provides little in the way of safety.

If you must transport your dog in a pickup, do so in a crate secured firmly to the bed of the truck. Using a crate will keep your dog's feet off the hot metal, and provide protection against him jumping out or being thrown out if you must stop sharply.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Why does the Federal Emergency Management Agency care about what happens to pets during disasters? It's simple: Because they've learned that if no one plans for animals, people will also suffer.

"Pets are more and more treated like members of the family," said Cindy Taylor, a spokesperson for FEMA's Project Impact, which works to get the word out about disaster preparedness, including offering tips for pet lovers. "The consequences of not planning for pets have consequences for humans."

Taylor cites examples where people put themselves and others in jeopardy in order to help their pets. "We've had emergency workers in situations where they had to rescue people who should have evacuated in advance but didn't because they wouldn't leave their pets. And some people put themselves in danger by re-entering an area too soon to search for their pets."

Project Impact has teamed with the Humane Society of the United States to help educate people on the steps they can take in advance of a disaster to help pets get through it with as little disruption as possible. The recommendations have the ring of common sense about them, but they aren't known or practiced by enough pet lovers.

At the top of the list of recommendations, according to Taylor: Do everything you can to avoid leaving your pets behind. "A lot of people turn their animals loose, figuring they would be better off fending for themselves," said Taylor. "That's not a good idea. Take your pets with you, but as a last resort, then you should leave them on the highest floor possible in your home, with a few days' supply of water and food."

Taylor stresses the need for keeping pets in mind when preparing a family disaster kit. Set aside extra bowls, collars, ID tags and leashes for all pets, along with pet food and drinking water. (If you use canned food, be sure you've packed pop-top cans or a manual can opener.) You'll also need copies of your pet's vaccination records, as well as a supply of any regular medications. Don't forget a litter box and filler for cats. For all pets, paper towels, plastic bags and disinfectant will make cleanups easier.

Many pets become separated from their families, which is why you should also do what you can to give you an edge in finding your pet. Prepare a folder with pictures of your pet to help with identification. Include a record of any identifying tattoos or microchips. And above all: Make sure a current ID tag is on your pet and that it carries not only your contact information, but also a number for a friend or relative who's out of the area (in case you cannot be reached).

Check into what arrangements are available in your community for pets in times of disasters. While some areas include shelter for pets in their plans, most communities will not allow animals in emergency shelters. Find out now about shelters, kennels or veterinary hospitals that will take in pets during an emergency. You'll find your options greatly expanded if you have a crate available for your pet's temporary housing.

Taylor says more people than ever are aware of the impact of disasters on animals, thanks to animal-welfare groups that have gone into areas to rescue pets, as well as the media's coverage of animals in trouble. "The news media have been attentive to showing pets who have been lost or abandoned after major disasters," she said, "and that gets people thinking, "What would I do?'"

Efforts like Project Impact work to provide the answers, which will make a difference for many pets and people in the years to come.

THE SCOOP

Albert Payson Terhune is nearly unknown today, but in the time immediately before and after World War I, he was a writer whose prominence rivaled that of his friend Sinclair Lewis. While the writings of Lewis endure and are studied in literature programs today, any interest in Terhune and his work, such as "Lad: A Dog," remains something of a hobby among a few people who like dogs.

Terhune, whose mother is credited with writing the first cookbook and who wrote his first book at the age of 24, lived a life interesting enough to keep several biographers busy over the decades. The latest effort, coming nearly 60 years after Terhune's death, is "His Dogs: Albert Payson Terhune and the Sunnybank Collies" by Kristina Marshall. The book, which contains many previously unpublished photographs, focuses on the dogs in Terhune's life.

The privately published volume is available for $45 (which includes shipping and handling), and is available from Krista Hansen, 1525 Minkel Road, North Java, NY 14113. Proceeds will benefit the Collie Club of America Foundation's efforts on behalf of the welfare of the breed. More information can be found on the foundation's Web site, www.cca-foundation.org/terhune.html.

PETS ON THE WEB

The veterinary associations of Texas, Hawaii and Southern California have teamed up to produce a gem of a basic-care Web site, especially for people whose pet interests go beyond dogs and cats. AnimalLibrary.com (www.animallibrary.com) is an easy-to-navigate site offering veterinary-approved information on such pets as hedgehogs, box turtles, sugar gliders, ferrets, rabbits and guinea pigs. The site also offers a library of dog- and cat-care guides, plus a collection of short pet-care advice items by Dr. Bernadine Cruz.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: I am going to adopt a cat from a friend. The cat was a stray and just had a litter of kittens. They are now 5 weeks old. The veterinarian said the mother cannot be spayed till 13 weeks after the birth of the kittens. Can she be spayed now? -- P.G., via e-mail

A: Thirteen weeks after giving birth allows too much time for a cat to get pregnant again. And a cat will get pregnant again, given even the slightest opportunity.

Alley Cat Allies, a national group that promotes the humane management of feral cat colonies, recommends spaying the mother cat two weeks after the kittens start to be weaned, which happens between the ages of 4 and 6 weeks. So you need to get the mother cat in for surgery about six to eight weeks after giving birth. In other words, make the arrangements now.

I'm not clear on what is happening to the kittens. Is your friend finding homes for them? If so, please let her know that the kittens don't need to wait long to be neutered, as well. Early spay-neuter has been accepted as safe by veterinary societies and shelters everywhere, and it can be done on cats and dogs as young as 8 weeks of age.

And what if you end up waiting too long to spay your new pet? Although it's a more complicated (and as a result, more expensive) surgery, veterinarians can and routinely do spay pregnant pets.

Q: Our dog, a terrier, is not quite 2 years old, and her barking is very irritating. We tried a bark collar, but she just got used to it. We will be traveling with her this summer. We'll be staying in motels and want to have her debarked. We live near Wichita, Kan., and want to know who does debarking here. We feel we have no other choice. Also, she doesn't like kids and will try to bite them! -- J.W., via e-mail

A: I've known a considerable number of debarked dogs in my time, since I've done rescue work with a breed that's known for its yappiness -- Shetland sheepdogs. Debarked dogs usually are still capable of barking, except that their volume is greatly reduced by the surgical alteration of their vocal cords.

Like declawing, debarking is a highly controversial procedure. I never recommend either surgery as a quick fix, and I suggest that other behavior modifications be seriously tried before any animal be put through a painful procedure. That said, I recognize that declawing and debarking have saved the lives of many animals whose behavior put them on a fast track to homelessness.

Before you talk to your veterinarian about debarking, ask for a referral to a behaviorist who can help you work on all of your dog's problems. I know barking is a nuisance, but it's natural behavior for terriers, breeds that also end up on the top of the heap when it comes to yappiness. I'm much more concerned about your dog's biting attempts, though. You need a behaviorist for your dog, or you'll need a lawyer soon enough.

I'm no fan of collars that shock dogs. In the hands of experts, they can be an effective training tool. But they are misused and overused by the general public. For barking, I much prefer collars that react to the noise with a harmless puff of citronella spray right under the nose -- which dogs find extremely annoying. You can find these in many pet-supply stores, catalogs or Web sites, at a cost of about $120.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Some experts have credited the invention and improvement of cat-box fillers as the driving force behind the feline rise in popularity, and certainly such a case can be made.

Before absorbent fillers became widely used and accepted, cats were mostly outdoor pets that our kind didn't appreciate for their companionship as much as we should have. After modern litter took off, however, cats became an integral part of the lives of an ever-increasing number of people. The rest, as they say, is history: Cats rule!

Here are your choices when it comes to thinking inside the box.

-- Clay. More than a half-century old and still a significant part of the market, fillers made of clay started the cat on the road to popularity. Clay is one of the least-expensive options in terms of price per pound, but you need to use more of it because the material needs to be completely replaced weekly to combat bacteria and odors. To remain competitive, the makers of clay litters have done a great deal to make their products more attractive, with the addition of deodorizers, dust-reducers and more.

-- Clumping. Also called "scoopable" litter, clumping has a high level of popularity among both pets and their owners. These materials dissolve around the moisture in urine or feces, reforming as a lump encasing the mess, which can then be easily scooped, raked or sifted out. Because the entire mess is scooped out each time -- assuming the clump doesn't break -- odor problems are minimized.

Although clumping litters are more expensive per pound, they require you to use less because all you need do is replace the litter you've removed with the waste. Although clumping litter does need to be replaced eventually in its entirety, that chore doesn't need to be done as often as with clay litters.

Drawbacks to clumping litter include tracking problems, because the material that sticks to moisture on cat mess clings just as easily to moisture on cat paws. A mat around the box will help knock the granules off your pet's paws before they end up all over the house.

-- Alternative litters. There's no end to the creative minds that have been active in the creation of new cat-box fillers. You'll find products made from wood fiber, corn cobs or kernels, and pelleted newsprint and other materials (some of them recycled from other uses).

Because the range of products in this category is so varied, it's hard to generalize about them. Some of these products, such as the corn-based World's Best Cat Litter, collect marvelous reviews and a dedicated following, while others come and go quickly.

Which kind of cat-box filler should you choose? Each variety has its benefits and its followers. Clay litters maintain a hefty share of the market to this day, which says this industry-starter is obviously still the right choice for many cats. Clumping litter's ease of use has made it a popular choice, and many behaviorists say it's best in terms of what cats prefer. And I know of cats whose homes (and probably lives) have been saved by the use of an alternative product when nothing else could get them to use their boxes.

Today's choices of cat-box fillers are mind-boggling, and when choosing one, it's essential that you keep in mind who the real customer is here: your cat. It doesn't matter how much you like a filler for its no-tracking, low-dust or odor-control properties. If your cat doesn't like it, you'll be finding waste in places you neither anticipated nor wanted.

Find the brand your cat likes, and then keep the box scrupulously clean. It's the only way to go.

PETS ON THE WEB

The Maine Coon is one breed of purebred cat whose popularity has grown in recent years, which means some of these large, sweet-natured cats are turning up in shelters. Rescuing and finding new homes for these down-on-their-luck kitties is one of the goals of the Maine Coon Alliance Web site (http://mainecoonalliance.vjungle.com), which also offers information on the breed and few imaginative features as well.

THE SCOOP

Now that gardening season is in full swing, a lot of people are thinking about compost piles and wondering: Is it OK to recycle pet waste in this way? It depends on your pet. If you have a pet that eats plant matter -- rabbits, guinea pigs, rats, hamsters and mice fall into this category -- then sure, compost their waste. It'll be great for your garden.

The waste of carnivores such as dog and cats should never be composted, however, because it could carry disease. With these pets, put the waste into bags, wrap up tightly and put into your regular trash. I always use old pet-food bags for waste disposal -- they're sturdy enough to stand up to reuse before being discarded.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: A few months ago I ran over my beloved cat in my driveway, and I've been having a hard time ever since, as you can imagine. Eventually I intend to get another pet, but the last two cats I've had both "adopted" me and were indoor-outdoor cats. I've never had a cat box except when they were spayed and needed to stay indoors for a while, and I have a cat door.

I've been worried about whether to have the same system with my next cat, and I was interested to read your column about moving cats. You seemed to indicate that it's a good thing to have a strictly indoor cat. Could you give me a little feedback on this? -- D.C., via e-mail

A: Yes, I do believe in keeping cats indoors, but I'm also enough of a realist to know that some people will always allow their cats to roam. I also trust that pet lovers always try to do what's best for their animals, and I believe that differences of opinion are what makes the world the interesting place that it is.

That said, there are compelling reasons for keeping cats indoors, and safety is tops among them. You are not the first person to have run over your cat -- I know of at least one other person in my extended circle of acquaintances, and at least a half-dozen readers in the last few years. And your own car certainly isn't the only risk out there.

Outdoor cats are run over by cars, attacked by dogs and coyotes, trapped intentionally by cat-hating neighbors, and trapped unintentionally by cat-neutral garages, outbuildings and basements. They get into poisons, contract diseases from other cats, and end up with painful and expensive injuries following cat fights. Seeking warmth, cats become injured when they snuggle up in still-warm car engines.

People who resent cat mess in their gardens or paw prints across their cars argue that cats are a nuisance. Free-roaming felines can also be a threat to birds and other prey animals, some of whom may be endangered. (Although to be fair, the biggest threat to these birds and small animals isn't cats, but the claiming of habitat for development or livestock grazing, here and in developing countries.) You might also be breaking the law by letting your cat out, since many communities have established laws against free-roaming cats.

Cats live longer, healthier lives inside, but can they also find happiness? Yes! Make sure your pet has a good cat tree, lots of toys and plenty of your attention. A screened-in porch or other safe access to fresh air is also tops on the list, but many cats do fine without them.

Converting a cat to the indoor life can be a trial for you both, but it can be done with patience and persistence. It's by far easier, though, to start a cat or kitten out indoors from the first day in a new home.

Q: Can you please explain how to put on a choke collar properly? I'm tired of seeing people walking their dogs with it on wrong. -- C.N., via e-mail

A: With the dog sitting on your left, make a downward facing "P" out of the collar, with the base of the letter on your side. Then slip the collar over the dog's head. The moving end of the collar should go over the dog's neck, not under it. If it's put on incorrectly, the collar will not release easily when the leash is slackened.

The choke collar is one of the most difficult pieces of training equipment to use properly, which is why I have in recent years discouraged its use. Newer products such as head halters are easier to use and provide control with less strain on the dog.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600