One of my readers picked up the ashes of her old Labrador the other day, the burnished wooden box the only physical remainder of the dog who had been part of her life for nearly 13 years. She had taken care of him for all that time, but only in the latter half of his life had she come to cherish his companionship.

His death was a double whammy: With him, he took the last reminder of the life she once led. He had been a family dog, a pup bought for the children -- her husband's idea, not hers, she said -- but at the end of his life, she and the dog were the only residents of the big suburban ranch house. Her children were grown and gone, and she and her husband had split. The house now seemed intolerably large, she said, and she figured she'd sell it.

In a smaller place, she'll get a smaller dog -- someday. But for now, there is the matter of the box. "It doesn't seem right to put it in a closet," she wrote. "He was a special dog, and he meant a lot to me. I want to do something more."

What can you do to remember a special pet? The answers are as varied as every person who has gone through such a loss. Some people figure when a pet is gone, that's it, and they don't do anything to remember them, save shed a few tears. I must admit to being in that camp: I've never stopped missing the pets I've lost, but I've never brought home ashes, arranged for a burial plot, or even so much as planted a rose bush in a pet's memory.

Some people have commissioned paintings, or donated millions to build new shelters in their community, or to fund efforts to fight pet overpopulation. Maddie's Fund, a Alameda, Calif.-based foundation that's making a big difference reducing the number of surplus animals, is named for a schnauzer once owned by software magnates Cheryl and Dave Duffield, whose millions fund the foundation in the dog's memory. In a considerably smaller way, others follow the Duffields' example, making a donation to a humane group or other animal-related charity.

Others have made photo albums or, in a high-tech twist, built or contributed to memorial Web pages. The back pages of pet-related publications carry ads offering urns, or small grave markers, and some people have chosen those. My friend Peg in Georgia had two goldens who were devoted to each other. Sadie died, but Sundance hung on for a few years more. When he died, Peg put their ashes next to each other on the mantel, so they could be together again.

Does all this sound silly? Not to anyone who has ever loved a pet. And we are in good company: Writers no less significant than Lord Byron and Eugene O'Neill have written on the sorrow over losing a pet, and the grave of writer Albert Payson Terhune's collie, Lad, still attracts visitors to the dog's New Jersey resting place more than 80 years after Lad's death. (The epitaph reads "Lad: Thoroughbred in Body and Soul, 1902-1918.")

I know the reader who is now contemplating that box of ashes will find an answer in her heart to the question of how best to remember her Labrador.

And now, readers, I want to know what you have done when faced with a similar situation. How have you honored the memory of a special pet? Drop me a note or e-mail at the address at the bottom of the column. I'll share responses in a future piece.

PETS ON THE WEB

The hip literary magazine The Bark, which offers the best writing on dogs within its pages, began life as a newsletter promoting off-leash recreation areas. The magazine's staff still actively supports safe places for dogs to run, and they've put a two-part overview of the issue on their Web site.

The first part examines the history and reasons behind legalized off-leash areas, and the second presents a step-by-step blueprint for those trying to get these important recreational sites put in place in their communities. The second part also offers links to other sites in support of dog parks.

The Bark's main Web page (www.TheBark.com) is undergoing a renovation, but you can access the dog park articles at www.thebark.com/new/dogpark1.html (click on the link at the top of the first article to get to the second). The pair is an outstanding resource, not only in helping to get local government to support off-leash areas, but in countering the arguments of any off-leash naysayers.

THE SCOOP

The spike-shaped burrs known as foxtails are more than an annoyance; they can cause infections if they work their way into a dog's body -- typically through the nose or ears, although the pointy devils have also wormed their way into eye sockets and between the pads on paws.

Foxtails move in one direction only -- forward -- and they utilize the vibration caused by the animal's movement to keep corkscrewing forward. Once they're inside, you'll need a veterinarian's help to pull them out and fight the infection.

The best preventive care is to check your dog constantly (but especially after a visit to a field or park) and remove foxtails the moment you see them. This can usually be accomplished with a comb or brush, but if you've left the foxtail long enough to really work its way into the fur, spritz a little non-stick cooking spray (such as Pam) onto the area to help you work the burr free.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: What's the best way to get rid of mites on my parakeet? Can I just hang one of those mite protectors in his cage? Will that kill them? -- J.W, via e-mail

A: Skip the mite protector; it could do more harm than good. Worms, mites, lice -- how much should you be worrying about the effect of parasites on your pet bird? The answer: not too much, overall. Not only are parasites a lot less common a problem than most people think, the actions some bird-lovers take to get rid of pests that don't exist in their birds in the first place can put their pets at grave risk.

As long as your healthy bird isn't exposed to other birds whose health is unknown, he realistically shouldn't be picking up parasites. Mites, lice and worms don't just materialize out of thin air!

"Deworming" your bird, or using sprays or other pest-control products, can be bad news for your bird. Birds are especially sensitive to inhaled toxins, from bug sprays to cleaning products to the fumes from overheated non-stick cookware. The best strategy is to avoid any harsh fumes around your bird, including those from the popular mite pendants.

If you believe your bird has parasites, see your veterinarian for proper diagnosis and safe treatment, as well as advice on how to prevent reinfestations. There are different types of lice, different types of mites and different types of intestinal parasites -- and there are different types of treatments for all of these problems. A veterinarian with experience in avian medicine will help you do what's best for your bird.

Q: My parents just got me a hamster, and I really like him. I'm wondering how long I can expect to have him. And one more question: Why does he always want to play at night? -- G.A., via e-mail

A: With good care, your pet should be with you for about three years.

Hamsters are active at night because they're supposed to be: Many rodents do their sleeping in hidden places by day and venture out at night when they're less likely to be spotted by a predator.

Basic hamster care includes using safe bedding material (no pine or cedar shavings), keeping the cage clean, and having fresh food and water constantly available. (Press the ball on the water bottle to ensure water is flowing freely.) Hamsters will do fine on commercial food supplemented by a small but constant amount of fresh, clean fruits and vegetables. A wheel for exercise is also important; after all, hamsters weren't meant to spend their lives in small cages, and they need to stretch their legs to stay healthy.

Hamsters are born escape artists, so always be sure to check and double-check the latch on your cage after you've been playing with your pet.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

So often I seem to be writing about the value of patience when it comes to getting a pet to do something he'd rather not. Time can work wonders, but sometimes those wonders take a lot of time indeed.

In the case of my big retriever, Benjamin, I can now report success with his nail-trimming. My most tender-footed pup now accepts nail trims as inevitable and doesn't fight me toe-by-toe. The timetable for such success? A mere five years. How time flies when you're not having fun struggling to keep nails trimmed on 80 pounds of highly reluctant dog!

Shortening nails can turn into a hard-fought war with bloody casualties on both sides. Because of that, many people leave the task of trimming nails to their groomer or veterinarian. But unless you're seeing these professionals a lot more than most people, your pet's nails aren't being trimmed often enough. Long nails can make walking uncomfortable and can even cause lameness, which is why trimming nails short -- they should be just off the ground when your pet is standing -- and then trimming them just a pinch every week is a better way to go.

The problem with nails is that each has a blood vessel inside. The trick is to trim to just beyond the end of this vein; if you nick it, the nail will bleed, and your dog will yelp. Everyone hits this vein on occasion, even veterinarians, which is why you should be sure to have blood-stopping powder on hand, such as Kwik Stop, before you start trimming.

If your dog has light-colored toenails, the blood vessel is the pink area. Black nails are harder to figure out, but you should be able to see the vein by shining a flashlight behind the nail. If you can't tell, just clip back a little at a time. If you draw blood, take a pinch of the powder and press it against the exposed bottom of the nail for a few seconds to stop the bleeding.

If your dog's nails are so long that they're forcing her foot out of position, you can take them back to where they should be in two ways. The first is to cut a little off them every few days: The quick recedes before you as you go. The second way is to have your veterinarian take them all the way back when your dog is under anesthesia, such as for a dental cleaning and scaling. After the nails are the proper length, both in the front and back, keeping them that way is easy with a weekly trim.

If your dog is resistant to having her nails trimmed, work up to the task slowly by touching her feet, then her toes, then the nails, all while praising her and giving her a treat for holding still. When she is used to having her feet handled, put the trimmer against the nail and praise and treat more still. Then trim a little off, and so on. Praise and more praise! Treats and more treats! Don't insist on getting all the nails done. Do one a night, and put the nippers away while both you and the dog are feeling positive about the experience.

The process of teaching a dog to tolerate nail trims can be a long one (and Benjamin is truly a worst-case scenario). If you're patient, consistent and persistent, you'll get there.

While you're trimming, don't forget the dewclaws, those extra toes you can find up on the inside of the leg. Not all dogs have them, but for those who do, neglected nails can be a problem. They catch on things such as upholstery and can tear the toe partly off the leg, which is one reason why many breeders have them removed at birth. Keeping the nail on the dewclaw short is important, too.

THE SCOOP

An alternative to nail-trimming is nail-grinding. You can buy a canine nail grinder, or just use a lightweight rotary grinding tool, such as the Dremmel. Some dogs very much prefer having their nails ground instead of clipped, perhaps because with a grinder it's easy to stop before you hit the quick. The most important thing to remember when grinding is that nails can get very hot while you're working on them. Don't grind continuously. Touch the grinder to the nail in very, very short bursts -- a second or two, at most -- to keep the heat from building up.

PETS ON THE WEB

How to Love Your Dog (www.geocities.com/(tilde)kidsanddogs) advertises itself as "A Kid's Guide to Dog Care," and you'll certainly be able to turn your kid loose here and feel good about the experience. The site offers oodles of fascinating information on dogs, along with kid-friendly tips on training and care, riddles, quizzes and games. I love the areas where the kids themselves contribute to the content.

The sections on what dogs cost and what dogs need will help children understand those circumstances when getting a dog just isn't possible. For those children who can't have dogs, a list of suggestions are included to ease the longing, from getting an alternative pet to walking a neighbor's dog. The creator, Janet Wall, also maintains a mailing list for parents and teachers who'd like to be kept informed when new content goes on the site.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: When my neighbor moved, she gave me her white cockatiel. Blanca is a nice bird (very tame), and we're getting along fine. Following your advice, I'm even trying to convert her from an all-seed diet to pellets, along with sharing my food with her. It's slow going, but we're getting there. One thing that came with Blanca has me wondering, though. My neighbor gave Blanca an antibiotic that she bought at a pet store whenever she thought her bird was sick. I guess it worked OK, but I noticed that the label says the medication is for fish. I wonder how safe it is. -- B.K., via e-mail

A: Antibiotics are one of the outstanding contributions of modern medicine, and they have saved countless lives. But we have become so comfortable with these medicines and their frequent usage that we sometimes forget they are powerful drugs that should be used with care.

And yet many pet owners respond to any sign of illness by dosing -- and often overdosing -- their pets with a couple of antibiotics commonly available at pet-supply stores (and often labeled for other pets, such as the one meant for fish). This sort of treatment for a sick bird is a spectacularly bad idea, for a couple of reasons.

First, if your bird has a viral or fungal infection, an antibiotic will not help. And in the case of a fungal infection, it may even worsen your bird's condition.

Second, not all antibiotics are the same. They each have their target bacteria, and may little affect the bacteria that they're not designed to combat, as well as bacteria that are resistant to their effects.

Finally, regular use of antibiotics may affect both your bird's immune system and the bacteria trying to beat it, leading to the development of antibiotic-resistant strains of bacteria that will be hard to stamp out even with the "right" medication.

When you buy an antibiotic at a pet-supply store, you are often wasting your money. And you're certainly losing time -- time that should be spent taking your bird to your veterinarian for an accurate diagnosis and targeted treatment.

I recommend that you take Blanca to see a veterinarian familiar with birds to assess her overall health and make sure she's getting the best possible care in your home. Your neighbor's reliance on an all-seed diet and over-the-counter medications means Blanca didn't get off to the best start in life. It's up to you to help her onto the right track.

Q: What's the largest breed of cat? -- H.R., via e-mail

A: It's a very rare breed in this country, but the Siberian cat may be the largest, with males approaching 30 pounds -- and looking even bigger, with a lush coat of long, thick fur. More common, the Maine coon cat is a pretty hefty contender, with males getting close to 20 pounds. The normal weight range for most cats runs 8 to 10 pounds, by the way.

The smallest breed of cat, incidentally, is the Singapura, which looks rather like a small Abyssinian. Females run as small as 4 pounds, and males aren't much bigger, at 6.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

When it comes to keeping bird cages clean, you'll find plenty of people at the extremes: There are folks who wait until the mess is spilling over the lip of the cage, and folks who instantly sterilize every toy, perch or food dish their birds set foot on.

The first group by far outnumbers the latter. But it's interesting that while those who tolerate mess are putting their birds at risk, those who never met anything they didn't want to sterilize are doing far more than they actually need to for optimum bird care.

Cleaning up after birds is a constant battle, but getting yourself into a routine makes it easier to cope. The good news is that a few minutes a day is all it takes.

Every morning and evening you should replace soiled cage liners. You might find it easier to do this chore after you've been up for a while, so your bird has a chance to get her big morning poop out of the way. Putting newspapers both above and below the grid at the bottom of the cage makes cleaning as you go easier. You can put a few layers at the base of the cage and remove layer by layer throughout the day whenever droppings appear. If you don't want to put newspapers above the grid, you can mist the bars with nonstick cooking spray -- not when your bird is nearby, though -- to help keep droppings from sticking.

You should also change food bowls and water bowls (or bottles) twice a day. Some birds get food or even droppings in their bowls, and you need to constantly check for bowls that need cleaning. If you use a water bottle with your bird, check every morning to ensure that it's not clogged by pressing the ball with your finger. (Birds can become seriously dehydrated very quickly.)

Birds usually prefer to eat after dawn and near dusk, so these are great times to introduce fresh fruits and vegetables -- and remove the leftovers before you go to work or bed. Leftover pelleted foods should be discarded every morning, and replaced with fresh.

Finish off your twice-daily routine by using your cleaning solution and paper towels, and use a handheld vacuum to clean up any other messes in the vicinity. And remember: Your dishwasher is a great tool for cleaning everything from perches to dishes to toys.

While daily attention will keep things pretty clean, you'll need to do a big scrub on a regular basis -- walls, floors, cage and all its contents. How often depends on your bird: Big birds are generally messier, if for no reason than sheer volume of droppings. Some species are really mess-makers too, such as the lories and lorikeets.

If your bird's really good at mess-making, you'll need to do the big clean on a weekly basis. Neater (and usually smaller) species can usually get by on a monthly scrub-down, provided, of course, you're religious about your daily routines. And remove, clean and replace dirty toys on an ongoing basis.

For the big clean, scrub the cage with soap and water, then rinse well in plain water. Soak everything you can't fit into the dishwasher -- big perches, dropping tray and so on -- in a solution of a half-cup bleach to a gallon of water (a bathtub's a good place for soaking) and then leave everything out to air-dry in the sun before setting it in place and putting your bird back in it. If you have a cage that's encrusted with droppings, you may find it easier to take it to a car wash than to scrub it clean. The high-pressure hoses at the do-it-yourself washes will help knock off the mess, but you'll still have to soap it up and rinse it well before you're done.

Cleaning is part of life with birds, and it's not the best part, to be sure. But if you get into the habit of cleaning as you go, you'll find it's not so bad.

PETS ON THE WEB

What does the Munchkin cat have in common with the Dandie Dinmont terrier? They are the only breeds of animal I can think of that are named after fictional characters. The terrier has been around long enough that hardly anyone can remember who Dandie Dinmont was, but the Munchkins of Oz fame are still going strong. So, too, are the cats they were named after, short-legged cuties that caused quite a storm when people started breeding to reproduce the mutation that created them. The Web site of the Get Down Munchkin breed club (www.ticastephens.org/munchkin.htm) offers an introduction to the breed, with plenty of pictures and links to other Munchkin sites.

THE SCOOP

If you live in an area where your pets might come in contact with skunks, raccoons or other wildlife, they are at risk for exposure to the deadly disease of rabies -- and that means you and the other two-legged members of your family are, too. Make sure to keep all your pets (cats, too) up to date on their rabies vaccinations. You just can't be too careful where rabies is concerned. Dogs are generally vaccinated at the age of 16 weeks, then again in a year, and at three-year intervals after that. Regulations vary, however, so talk to your veterinarian about what the law requires in your area.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: My mother sent me your article about

de-skunking your pet. It was chemist Paul Krebaum's recipe of hydrogen peroxide, baking soda and soap.

Well, it works. It was wonderful to be able to welcome the dog back into the house after the spraying and then the bath. I've sent the recipe to relatives and a friend. I plan to send it to the local greyhound enthusiasts who are always passing along "doggie tips." Thanks to Krebaum, to you and to my mom. -- L.V., via e-mail

A: Every day since that column ran, I've received mail either asking for the recipe again or thanking me for publishing it in the first place. I am blissfully happy to report that I have not once had to try Paul Krebaum's recipe -- and I certainly hope the situation remains that way.

This seems a good time to offer up the magic cure again, for those whose dogs have just been skunked or will be skunked soon:

Take 1 quart of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide (available from any drugstore), 1/4 cup of baking soda (sodium bicarbonate for you science types) and 1 teaspoon of liquid soap, such as Ivory. Mix and immediately apply to the stinky pet. Rinse thoroughly with tap water.

Now remember, you must mix the ingredients fresh each time, because the chemical reaction that occurs when everything gets together will burst any container you put it in. For best results, apply the concoction immediately, while it's furiously bubbling.

While you can't keep the ingredients premixed, you probably ought to keep them on hand if you're in an area where skunks are common. Every minute with a skunked dog is one too many.

Q: On our walk the other night, my Lab mix came across a rattlesnake and was extremely interested in it. I was able to get her away from it and back on leash before she could be bitten, but I'm afraid to take her there again. How can I teach her to leave snakes alone?

A: My area had huge flooding problems a few years back, and after the river settled just beneath the lip of the levee, I decided to go look at the mess with one of my dogs.

I parked the car, and we hiked to the top of the levee, the dog running around exploring all the interesting smells. I was looking in shock at the scene -- uprooted trees tossed about like sticks -- when I heard the telltale sound of a rattler. I don't know how I could have missed it, but I realized the levee was covered with snakes, all trying to warm up after their own flood ordeal. I consider myself very lucky that both the dog and I got out of there unbitten. Thank heavens he was well-trained enough to return on my command.

Dogs can be trained to avoid snakes, and should be, if you're regularly in an area where you run across them. Hunting-dog trainers use an electric collar and captive snakes to teach this life-saving lesson. The dogs are given a shock when they show an interest in getting close to the reptile.

This training is usually set up in clinics so several dogs can be taught over the course of a day. Costs are usually less than $50. Ask your veterinarian for a referral to a hunting-dog trainer in your area. A store that caters to hunters will probably also be able to point you in the right direction.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600