Those who are saddened by the belief that their old dogs can't learn new tricks will be cheered by the story of Andy, who is 13 years old and still learning.

Those who are cheered by the belief that they are smarter than their dogs will be saddened by the story of Gina -- never mind how old -- being thoroughly outwitted by the aforementioned 13-year-old dog.

The story I humbly relate is a classic example of how we humans can cause our own problems when it comes to the behavior of our pets -- and how we can change things for the better if we try.

Andy likes to eat. With arthritis dampening his enthusiasm for playing fetch and deafness curtailing his ability to hear the mail carrier coming, eating is about the only hobby he has left. Now, I like to see a healthy eater, for I know that when dogs stop caring about living, they stop caring about eating. But the problem is breakfast. Andy likes to eat early.

For most of Andy's life, this wasn't a problem. I worked in an office, got up early and fed the dogs. But now that I work at home, my hours are far more erratic. Sometimes I'll work long into the night and beyond, leaving me with little interest in setting the alarm for 6 a.m. just so I can fill the dog dishes.

So Andy, clever boy that he is, started waking me up.

At first it was no big deal. He'd bump the bed at 6:15 a.m., and I'd get up. If I resisted, he'd pull the Lassie maneuver, trotting back and forth between the kitchen and the bedroom, nails clicking loudly on the hardwood floors. By that time, the retrievers would be bouncing around, too, and I'd have no choice but to get up and feed them all. And go back to bed.

Then came the day when I realized Andy was waking me at 6 a.m., then a month later, at 5:30. I wasn't happy about it, but it wasn't a big deal. And besides, it was Andy, my special boy who wouldn't be with me forever. How could I deny him such a small indulgence?

I did make an effort here and there, holding out until he upped his level of insistence before I'd give in and get up, or refusing on the odd day to play his game at all. In this way, I was training him even as he was training me.

Anyone who knows anything about the psychology of learning knows that random rewards make the behavior stronger. That's the theory behind slot machines, after all: You get a little reward now and then, and you keep playing, with even more determination than before. I knew all this, and yet ... well, what can I say? I'm just not that smart in the morning.

But maybe Andy isn't as smart as he thinks. Finally, he pushed me too far. A couple weeks ago, on a morning that first hinted at the cold days to come, he woke me at the amazing hour of 4 a.m. Enough was enough.

I put a baby gate across the door to my bedroom, with the dogs on the other side, innocent retrievers included. And I resolved to ignore -- completely and totally -- Andy's 4 a.m. shenanigans, knowing that any sign of weakness would make matters worse. Again, it's like that slot machine: If you think it has gone cold on you -- no small payouts -- you'll eventually walk away.

We're still at that stage where Andy's still trying to insist on his morning payout, but the amount of racket on the other side of the baby gate is slowly diminishing. He's not an idiot; he'll eventually know it's not worth the effort and give up.

And not a moment too soon, because with the clocks having been set back, Andy at 4 a.m. would now become a 3 a.m. wake-up call. And that would have never worked.

Much as I love the old dog, he would have been out of luck. I wouldn't get up at 3 a.m. to meet my maker.

THE SCOOP

Over the years I've been encouraged by pet-supply chains that choose the high road and decide not to sell dogs and cats -- and, not incidentally, generate a lot of goodwill at the same time. Yet I'm disappointed that these chains continue to sell other pets, in somewhat callous disregard of the mortality rates before and after purchase of mass-produced birds, reptiles, pocket pets and fish.

That's why I'm pleased to offer a tip of the hat to PETsMART, which has decided to end sales of green iguanas. In announcing the change, the chain pointed out that the critters can reach 4 or 5 feet in length as adults and can develop a nasty attitude as well. Few people are prepared to deal with these facts when they take home a pet that's only a few inches long. Iguanas are so rarely cared for properly that most never see adulthood, and those that do often end up increasing the burden at shelters and rescue groups. PETsMART is to be congratulated for doing the right thing, again. Now, about the rest of those critters ...

PETS ON THE WEB

Like many writers, I belong to a handful of national writing organizations. My favorite of all of them is the Cat Writers Association (www.catwriters.org). Modeled after the venerable Dog Writers Association of America (www.dwaa.org), the CWA has grown beyond the expectations of its founders, developing a large membership and a fantastic annual conference in just over a decade.

What I like about the CWA, though, is how supportive it is to people who are just getting started. Everyone in the organization remembers what that's like, and they believe in helping. Members even maintain an e-mail list where questions are answered, victories celebrated and losses consoled.

If you love cats and are just getting started in writing about them, this is one group you need to know about. Its Web site says it all, with information on joining, and even a list of members so you can see what fine company you'll be in.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: A teacher at my school has a cockatoo. It perches on a stand all day, says a few words and is very sweet. It is large and has white feathers. Do you have any advice on these birds? I really want to get one, but my mom says they are probably too expensive. Please help. -- B.R., via e-mail

A: Cockatoos have a reputation as "love sponges" -- birds who, in the words of avian behaviorist Chris Davis, would choose to be surgically grafted onto their human companions if they could. That's only half the story, though. In fact, cockatoos come in two basic behavioral types: "love sponges" and "hyperactive children."

Umbrella and Moluccan cockatoos are in the first group. Undeniably sweet and cuddly, these large, flashy birds can become a problem if spoiled excessively, demanding attention 28 hours a day. If ignored, they can develop behavior problems such as unstoppable screaming and feather-picking.

The "hyperactive children" are best represented by the Goffins and bare-eyed cockatoos. Not always so keen on snuggling, these clowns never met a toy (or cage door) they couldn't figure out and take apart. Some of these birds need padlocks on their cages to keep them from escaping -- and not combination locks, either. Goffins and bare-eyed cockatoos learn tricks easily and perform them enthusiastically.

No matter the species, there's never a dull moment when you share your life with a cockatoo. Prices range from $400 for some of the smaller species, such as Goffins, to $2,000 for Moluccans. Rare species, such as some of the black cockatoos, can run as high as $20,000.

Because of the prices and the size, I'd recommend instead that you provide your mom with information on some of the smaller parrots, such as parakeets, lovebirds and cockatiels. You might have a better chance convincing her to make one of these species your first bird. These little guys are packed with personality, they are less expensive to acquire and maintain, and they are easier to live with than their cockatoo relatives.

Q: I took an online quiz to find my perfect dog, and the answer that came back was a border collie. Are they an easy breed to take care of? Do they listen to you when you talk to them? Are they a sweet, gentle breed? Are they protective against people they don't know? - B.D., via e-mail

A: Your suitability for life with a border collie depends on whether or not you keep sheep in your back yard. Many breeds have nearly had their original purpose bred out of them, but the border collie still maintains his hard-working personality. He needs a job to do.

The border collie has been riding a wave of popularity lately, helped by the success of the movie "Babe," and by the breed's high profile as an athletic and agile canine Einstein. That popularity is too bad, because the border collie needs a lot more than most people can offer, and a bored border collie can be a horrible pet.

Those who share their lives with border collies must be constantly working on ways to keep this dog's fantastic mind and body busy. BCs need exercise and training, forever. They never want to stop moving or stop learning, which is why so many of them excel in sports such as obedience and agility. Easy to keep? Hardly. This is not a dog who'll be content with a short walk a couple times a week or long days alone in the yard.

They are intense listeners -- intense at everything they do -- but protectiveness, sweetness and gentleness will vary from dog to dog. I've known BCs who were absolute charmers, and others who cared for nothing but the object of their obsession, such as a tennis ball. As for protective ability, remember that the border collie was developed more for moving sheep than protecting them, a job that fell to flock-guarding breeds such as the Great Pyrenees.

For most people, the border collie isn't the best choice. It's too much dog for urban or suburban environments. The people who make it work are those who work their dogs, primarily in dog sports.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Here's a rule to remember when it comes to dealing with feline aggression: Never, ever hit your cat.

While it may make you feel better -- at least in the short run -- a smack won't help you change a cat who appears to delight in sinking teeth and claws into you at seemingly unpredictable moments.

Fear and pain can cause a cat to lash out. The best way to deal with a scared cat is to let him be, while a sick cat surely needs a veterinarian. But most times what we see as "meanness" in a cat is just part of being a cat. You can change this behavior, but only if you understand what's behind it and react properly. Here's what makes cats go crazy and how to correct the problem.

-- Overstimulation. You're petting your cat and suddenly he grabs you with his claws and teeth. Not a full-powered attack, but you've still got those sharp tips around your hand. What to do? In the short run, freeze. Don't struggle or fight back, or you may trigger a real bite. Sometimes smacking your other hand hard against a hard surface -- a table top, for example -- may startle your cat into breaking off the attack. If you stay still, however, he will usually calm down and release you.

That's the solution if you've gotten to the attack stage. The better option is to be familiar with your cat and his body language and stop petting before he becomes overstimulated. Cat lovers often think such attacks come without warning, but the fact is that they missed the warning signs of a cat who has simply had enough. The tail is the key. If your cat starts twitching his tail in a jerky fashion, it's time to stop petting, or to switch to an area that's more relaxing. Belly rubs are fine for dogs, but not for cats. Instead of petting your cat's sensitive tummy, rub behind his ears or at the base of the tail.

-- Play aggression. Sure, it hurts all the same, but the cat who pounces on your feet and then careens off the wall isn't trying to claw you -- he's playing. Instead of punishing your cat, redirect his energy. Increase your play sessions with your cat with an appropriate toy, such as a cat fishing pole or toy on a string, to help your cat burn off his excess energy before you try for a quiet petting session.

No matter what, never let your cat view you as a plaything, not even when he's an adorable kitten. Wrestling bare-handed with your cat or kitten is a no-no, because you're setting up a bad precedent. A stuffed sock is a great substitute for a human hand when it comes to playthings -- let your cat bite, claw and bunny-kick to his heart's content.

What if he persists in seeing you as a plaything? As with the overstimulated cat, stop the behavior by freezing. Don't give him a reason to continue the attack. You can also inform him that attacks on you are not permitted by letting him have it with a shot from a spray bottle. A nice theatrical scream helps, too, unless you have neighbors close enough to hear you and call the cops.

-- Redirected aggression. Your cat sees another cat, an intruder, outside your living-room window. He becomes enraged. You walk by, and he nails you. What gives? You were just the victim of redirected aggression.

This one's tough to fix. Try to discourage strange cats in your yard. Thump on the window, or put an air horn out the door and give them a blast. And again, be aware of your cat's body language. A cat who's looking for trouble is one who's best avoided.

With all feline aggression, the trick is to eliminate the triggers and work on your cat's tolerance levels. If you're patient and consistent, your cat will improve over time.

If you give in to temptation and smack your pet, though, you'll end up with a pet who's even more aggressive, or who's terrified of you. Either outcome makes it well worth the effort to stick to a nonviolent approach.

PETS ON THE WEB

It's not pretty, but Kyler Laird's collection of animal-rescue resources (www.ecn.purdue.edu/(tilde)laird/animal_rescue) may be just the Web site you need if you're looking to adopt a pet. The site is nothing but links -- and lots of them -- to shelters and to various small rescue organizations. Constantly growing and frequently checked (although I did find a couple of outdated links), Laird's collection is a great place to start if you're looking to adopt a particular kind of pet (such as a ferret or rabbit) or specific breed of dog or cat. Another of his creations, Purdue Dogs (www.ecn.purdue.edu/(tilde)laird/dogs) is also worth a look, especially for his comprehensive list of canine terms.

THE SCOOP

Cats get into -- and onto -- everything, which can make decorating your home a challenge, especially if you're fond of delicate collectibles. Although it's best to put your most fragile and valuable items in hutches or glass-fronted bookcases, you can get a degree of security for the rest with a product called Quake Hold, a putty that seals objects to shelves and counters. Quake Hold should be available at your home center or hardware store. If it's not, though, you can pick up some double-sided tape or Velcro for another way to keep your cats from knocking over your goodies.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: I got a cat for the first time, and I was wondering: What does it mean when a cat purrs? -- A.S., via e-mail.

A: Purring is one of the more special elements of a cat, as far as most humans are concerned. Caressing a purring pet is proven to relax the one doing the stroking -- and lower the blood pressure, too. A purring cat or kitten is sure to bring a smile to the face of any human, young or old, and cats have made a real difference in the lives of those in nursing homes or other institutional settings.

But careful observers of cats know that purring isn't just a sound of contentment. Cats also purr if they're injured, while giving birth -- even when dying. British zoologist Desmond Morris has observed in his masterwork, "Catworld: A Feline Encyclopedia" (Penguin Reference), that purring is "a sign of friendship -- either when (the cat) is contented with a friend, or when it is in need of friendship ... as with a cat in trouble."

Although the experts are pretty clear on why cats purr, they're not yet certain as to how. The most common explanation has the sweet sound originating in the voice box, with what are called the vestibular folds, or false vocal cords. The passing of air across these structures is thought to produce the purr all cat lovers adore.

Q: You mentioned in your recent column that when grooming a double-coated dog during shedding season, you get enough fluff to make another dog. Anyhow, don't throw that fluff away! Hand-spinners have discovered that this stuff (dubbed "chiengora") makes wonderfully soft and amazingly warm yarn. And yes, the doggy smell washes right out. -- Anne Weber, via e-mail

A: Thanks for your note. Yes, it's indeed possible to make sweaters from what your dog sheds, especially if yours is a long-haired, double-coated dog such as a collie or Samoyed.

If you want to try to make clothes from dog wool, there's even a book that will walk you through the process. Kendall Crolius and Anne Black Montgomery put it all together in their book "Knitting With Dog Hair: Better a Sweater From a Dog You Know and Love Than From a Sheep You'll Never Meet" (St. Martin's Press, $10.95, and whew, what a title!). One reviewer on Amazon.com noted a wonderful side benefit to using your dog's hair for sweaters -- as a discipline tool: "You be quiet now, or I'll make a sweater out of you."

If you'd like to try the knitting without the spinning, check out the classifieds of Dog Fancy or Dog World magazine. Hand-spinners will sometimes advertise in such publications and will turn your dog's fur into yarn for a fee. You can also contact local craft stores to get the names of hand-spinners in your area, or do a Web search for "hand-spinning." "Knitting With Dog Hair" also offers tips to finding artisans who can help you at every step, even if all you want is a finished product.

Some folks probably would find the idea of wearing a dog-hair sweater or scarf appalling. But I rather like it. When I think of all the grocery bags full of hair I've combed out of the Shelties over the years, I'm really sorry I missed the opportunity to have a scarf or something to remember some really great dogs who've passed on.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

When you spend your life researching and writing about the absolute best way to choose, raise, train and care for an animal companion, you start to believe that the way you do things for your own animals is the only one that works.

You confirm your belief every day by talking to only the world's top veterinary experts and only the best breeders, trainers and animal-welfare authorities. You hang around with people who are as pet-crazy as you are: people whose dogs have different collars for different social events, whose cats stay inside homes with expensive cat trees, whose birds have cages so large you could raise families in them, and whose pets have more toys than many children have.

And then you go to a place where not only have the people you know never given a birthday party for a dog, but they've also never known anyone who has, and they laugh when they see such a thing on TV. A place where the cats wander where they will, and where many of the hunting-breed dogs know what it's like to spend the day finding and fetching birds that have been shot.

It's a culture clash of monumental proportions, my politically correct northern California attitude colliding with the realities of life in my adopted south Georgia hometown, a place I visit every year. And yet for all the differences, one element of sharing a life with animals remains the same. We love our pets.

It speaks to the graciousness of the friends with whom I stay that I've been welcomed back every year. I could not keep my mouth shut early on about the things that should have been different in their home, in my not-so-humble opinion. The cats should come in, the dogs should be fed differently, and the bird's cage should go somewhere other than the wide central hall of the old Victorian home. I was suspect of their small-town veterinarian and felt that any illness that lasted beyond a week and two appointments warranted a five-hour drive to the veterinary college, where a cutting-edge specialist could be found.

My friends smiled at me indulgently as we spent warm Georgia evenings in rockers on the porch, a purring cat in every lap. A few things have changed over the years -- all the animals are spayed or neutered now, I'm happy to say -- but the cats still come and go as they please, the dogs still eat what and when they are served, and the bird still lives in the hallway.

Yet their animals are as healthy and happy as any I've seen. The cats stick around, wandering inside and out, their numbers not diminished by accidents but actually increasing on occasion by the appearance of a homeless kitten or cat. The dogs get their exercise and sleep on the bed. The cockatiel looks great and seems happy. And it turns out their vet is pretty skilled after all.

As for me, I have learned to keep my mouth shut, to listen and, most of all, to relax. My friends and I will likely never agree on what's best for our pets. But as long as the results are the same -- happy, healthy and long-lived pets -- who am I to say that my way is the only way, no matter how many experts I have in my corner?

My trips to south Georgia teach me many things, but there's one thing my friends and I would agree on without question: The first and most important part of caring for a pet is love.

When you leave from such a starting place, it's hard to head in the wrong direction.

PETS ON THE WEB

If you're interested in becoming a veterinarian, finding the nearest school or college of veterinary medicine, or tapping into recent trends in the profession, the Association of American Veterinary Medical Colleges (www.aavmc.org) is worth a double click. Lots of good stuff is here, both in information and in links, but perhaps the most fascinating page is all about statistics. One number you'll find there that is sure to tell a story in years to come: 72.4, which is the percentage of veterinary school applicants who are women.

THE SCOOP

Cats crave warmth. And with winter fast approaching, it's essential to check and double check to make sure your cats -- or any cats -- haven't gotten into warm places that could cost them their lives. Two common cat-killers: car engines and electric dryers.

Car engines stay warm long after they're shut off, and cats will sometimes creep into the engine compartment to snuggle in. If they're still there when the key is turned, they can be injured or killed. As for dryers, cats have been known to crawl in to enjoy a pile of freshly dried clothes, only to be trapped when someone adds clothes without noticing the cat and turns on the machine again.

Prevention is easy: Thump a few times on the hood of your car before starting it to frighten away any hiding cat. And get in the habit of making sure your dryer has nothing in it but clothing before you turn it on.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We are a family of four and have a 4-year-old cocker spaniel. During the week we leave our home between 7 and 7:30 a.m. Our little dog is home by herself, and I feel bad that we have to leave her. I leave on a television or radio for her and make sure she has water and food. Is there anything more we can do for her? I feel that she is lonesome during the day and that we are somehow mistreating her. I feel that keeping her in is kind of cruel and that I should come home at noon to let her out. But the time spent commuting back home doesn't permit it. What do you think? -- W.D., via e-mail

A: What do I think about your commute? Clearly, you need to quit your job, find one within a five-minute drive or -- better yet -- arrange to work at home.

Wait! I'm kidding.

Dogs and cats are very flexible. If you make sure their needs are met, they can cope with almost anything. That's why you can find perfectly contented pets living in apartments in Manhattan and on farms in Kansas, with single people, doting couples and families with children. They can adjust to owners who work nights, days and weekends, and who travel frequently. And they can even adjust to such ne'er-do-wells as pet columnists who spend most of their days at home.

Although I'm certainly happier spending my days in the company of my three dogs and my parrot, they were just as content when I was trudging to an office. They spend their days pretty much the same way with me at home as they did when I was gone every day -- they sleep. They don't wear watches, and they never glance at the clock on the microwave. One hour is about the same as eight to them, since they haven't the concept of time that we do.

I'm assuming that your dog isn't showing any signs of separation anxiety, such as leaving piles of poop, clawing windows or doors, or ripping apart your sofa. If you're not seeing any problems, she's probably sleeping the day away. (If she is having problems, talk to your veterinarian about a referral to a trainer or behaviorist, as well as about some new medications that might help.)

Your dog would appreciate a midday trip to the yard, or a dog door that allowed her access. If that's not possible, though, she's fine until you get home. She's clearly one of the lucky ones to have a family that cares about her as much as yours does.

Q: I always hear different things about how a cat ages: that one year of its life equals seven of a human life, or that a 1-year-old cat is like an adult of 18. Then you add six years thereafter for each year it is alive.

Could you tell me how to calculate the "human" age of a cat. I currently have two. One is 17 and the other is 12. -- S.C., via e-mail

Q: As faithful readers of your column, we know that some time ago you had an item on calculating the age of a cat in human years. We failed to save the article. We have two 18-year-old cats. They are still doing great for that many years, in spite of kidney and hyperthyroidism problems. Can you tell us how to compute their age? -- J.J.H., via e-mail

A: Count the first year of a cat's life as being comparable to the time a human reaches the early stages of adulthood -- the age of 15 or so. Like a human adolescent, a 1-year-old cat looks fairly grown up and is physically capable of becoming a parent but is lacking in emotional maturity.

The second year of a cat's life picks up some of that maturity and takes a cat to the first stages of full adulthood in humans -- a 2-year-old cat is roughly equivalent to a person in her mid-20s. From there, a "four equals one" rule works pretty well.

With such a formula, the 12-year-old cat is roughly equal to a 65-year-old human. The 17-year-old cat is similar to an 85-year-old human, and the two 18-year-olds are doing very well indeed for being the equivalent of almost 90.

I love to hear about older cats. When I was young -- six to eight years ago in "cat years" -- disease, cars and other calamities seemed to take most cats at young ages. Modern preventive care combined with more cats being kept indoors has changed things. As a result, I'm no longer surprised to hear of cats in their late teens.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600