Here's a rule to remember when it comes to dealing with feline aggression: Never, ever hit your cat.

While it may make you feel better -- at least in the short run -- a smack won't help you change a cat who appears to delight in sinking teeth and claws into you at seemingly unpredictable moments.

Fear and pain can cause a cat to lash out. The best way to deal with a scared cat is to let him be, while a sick cat surely needs a veterinarian. But most times what we see as "meanness" in a cat is just part of being a cat. You can change this behavior, but only if you understand what's behind it and react properly. Here's what makes cats go crazy and how to correct the problem.

-- Overstimulation. You're petting your cat and suddenly he grabs you with his claws and teeth. Not a full-powered attack, but you've still got those sharp tips around your hand. What to do? In the short run, freeze. Don't struggle or fight back, or you may trigger a real bite. Sometimes smacking your other hand hard against a hard surface -- a table top, for example -- may startle your cat into breaking off the attack. If you stay still, however, he will usually calm down and release you.

That's the solution if you've gotten to the attack stage. The better option is to be familiar with your cat and his body language and stop petting before he becomes overstimulated. Cat lovers often think such attacks come without warning, but the fact is that they missed the warning signs of a cat who has simply had enough. The tail is the key. If your cat starts twitching his tail in a jerky fashion, it's time to stop petting, or to switch to an area that's more relaxing. Belly rubs are fine for dogs, but not for cats. Instead of petting your cat's sensitive tummy, rub behind his ears or at the base of the tail.

-- Play aggression. Sure, it hurts all the same, but the cat who pounces on your feet and then careens off the wall isn't trying to claw you -- he's playing. Instead of punishing your cat, redirect his energy. Increase your play sessions with your cat with an appropriate toy, such as a cat fishing pole or toy on a string, to help your cat burn off his excess energy before you try for a quiet petting session.

No matter what, never let your cat view you as a plaything, not even when he's an adorable kitten. Wrestling bare-handed with your cat or kitten is a no-no, because you're setting up a bad precedent. A stuffed sock is a great substitute for a human hand when it comes to playthings -- let your cat bite, claw and bunny-kick to his heart's content.

What if he persists in seeing you as a plaything? As with the overstimulated cat, stop the behavior by freezing. Don't give him a reason to continue the attack. You can also inform him that attacks on you are not permitted by letting him have it with a shot from a spray bottle. A nice theatrical scream helps, too, unless you have neighbors close enough to hear you and call the cops.

-- Redirected aggression. Your cat sees another cat, an intruder, outside your living-room window. He becomes enraged. You walk by, and he nails you. What gives? You were just the victim of redirected aggression.

This one's tough to fix. Try to discourage strange cats in your yard. Thump on the window, or put an air horn out the door and give them a blast. And again, be aware of your cat's body language. A cat who's looking for trouble is one who's best avoided.

With all feline aggression, the trick is to eliminate the triggers and work on your cat's tolerance levels. If you're patient and consistent, your cat will improve over time.

If you give in to temptation and smack your pet, though, you'll end up with a pet who's even more aggressive, or who's terrified of you. Either outcome makes it well worth the effort to stick to a nonviolent approach.

PETS ON THE WEB

It's not pretty, but Kyler Laird's collection of animal-rescue resources (www.ecn.purdue.edu/(tilde)laird/animal_rescue) may be just the Web site you need if you're looking to adopt a pet. The site is nothing but links -- and lots of them -- to shelters and to various small rescue organizations. Constantly growing and frequently checked (although I did find a couple of outdated links), Laird's collection is a great place to start if you're looking to adopt a particular kind of pet (such as a ferret or rabbit) or specific breed of dog or cat. Another of his creations, Purdue Dogs (www.ecn.purdue.edu/(tilde)laird/dogs) is also worth a look, especially for his comprehensive list of canine terms.

THE SCOOP

Cats get into -- and onto -- everything, which can make decorating your home a challenge, especially if you're fond of delicate collectibles. Although it's best to put your most fragile and valuable items in hutches or glass-fronted bookcases, you can get a degree of security for the rest with a product called Quake Hold, a putty that seals objects to shelves and counters. Quake Hold should be available at your home center or hardware store. If it's not, though, you can pick up some double-sided tape or Velcro for another way to keep your cats from knocking over your goodies.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: I got a cat for the first time, and I was wondering: What does it mean when a cat purrs? -- A.S., via e-mail.

A: Purring is one of the more special elements of a cat, as far as most humans are concerned. Caressing a purring pet is proven to relax the one doing the stroking -- and lower the blood pressure, too. A purring cat or kitten is sure to bring a smile to the face of any human, young or old, and cats have made a real difference in the lives of those in nursing homes or other institutional settings.

But careful observers of cats know that purring isn't just a sound of contentment. Cats also purr if they're injured, while giving birth -- even when dying. British zoologist Desmond Morris has observed in his masterwork, "Catworld: A Feline Encyclopedia" (Penguin Reference), that purring is "a sign of friendship -- either when (the cat) is contented with a friend, or when it is in need of friendship ... as with a cat in trouble."

Although the experts are pretty clear on why cats purr, they're not yet certain as to how. The most common explanation has the sweet sound originating in the voice box, with what are called the vestibular folds, or false vocal cords. The passing of air across these structures is thought to produce the purr all cat lovers adore.

Q: You mentioned in your recent column that when grooming a double-coated dog during shedding season, you get enough fluff to make another dog. Anyhow, don't throw that fluff away! Hand-spinners have discovered that this stuff (dubbed "chiengora") makes wonderfully soft and amazingly warm yarn. And yes, the doggy smell washes right out. -- Anne Weber, via e-mail

A: Thanks for your note. Yes, it's indeed possible to make sweaters from what your dog sheds, especially if yours is a long-haired, double-coated dog such as a collie or Samoyed.

If you want to try to make clothes from dog wool, there's even a book that will walk you through the process. Kendall Crolius and Anne Black Montgomery put it all together in their book "Knitting With Dog Hair: Better a Sweater From a Dog You Know and Love Than From a Sheep You'll Never Meet" (St. Martin's Press, $10.95, and whew, what a title!). One reviewer on Amazon.com noted a wonderful side benefit to using your dog's hair for sweaters -- as a discipline tool: "You be quiet now, or I'll make a sweater out of you."

If you'd like to try the knitting without the spinning, check out the classifieds of Dog Fancy or Dog World magazine. Hand-spinners will sometimes advertise in such publications and will turn your dog's fur into yarn for a fee. You can also contact local craft stores to get the names of hand-spinners in your area, or do a Web search for "hand-spinning." "Knitting With Dog Hair" also offers tips to finding artisans who can help you at every step, even if all you want is a finished product.

Some folks probably would find the idea of wearing a dog-hair sweater or scarf appalling. But I rather like it. When I think of all the grocery bags full of hair I've combed out of the Shelties over the years, I'm really sorry I missed the opportunity to have a scarf or something to remember some really great dogs who've passed on.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

When you spend your life researching and writing about the absolute best way to choose, raise, train and care for an animal companion, you start to believe that the way you do things for your own animals is the only one that works.

You confirm your belief every day by talking to only the world's top veterinary experts and only the best breeders, trainers and animal-welfare authorities. You hang around with people who are as pet-crazy as you are: people whose dogs have different collars for different social events, whose cats stay inside homes with expensive cat trees, whose birds have cages so large you could raise families in them, and whose pets have more toys than many children have.

And then you go to a place where not only have the people you know never given a birthday party for a dog, but they've also never known anyone who has, and they laugh when they see such a thing on TV. A place where the cats wander where they will, and where many of the hunting-breed dogs know what it's like to spend the day finding and fetching birds that have been shot.

It's a culture clash of monumental proportions, my politically correct northern California attitude colliding with the realities of life in my adopted south Georgia hometown, a place I visit every year. And yet for all the differences, one element of sharing a life with animals remains the same. We love our pets.

It speaks to the graciousness of the friends with whom I stay that I've been welcomed back every year. I could not keep my mouth shut early on about the things that should have been different in their home, in my not-so-humble opinion. The cats should come in, the dogs should be fed differently, and the bird's cage should go somewhere other than the wide central hall of the old Victorian home. I was suspect of their small-town veterinarian and felt that any illness that lasted beyond a week and two appointments warranted a five-hour drive to the veterinary college, where a cutting-edge specialist could be found.

My friends smiled at me indulgently as we spent warm Georgia evenings in rockers on the porch, a purring cat in every lap. A few things have changed over the years -- all the animals are spayed or neutered now, I'm happy to say -- but the cats still come and go as they please, the dogs still eat what and when they are served, and the bird still lives in the hallway.

Yet their animals are as healthy and happy as any I've seen. The cats stick around, wandering inside and out, their numbers not diminished by accidents but actually increasing on occasion by the appearance of a homeless kitten or cat. The dogs get their exercise and sleep on the bed. The cockatiel looks great and seems happy. And it turns out their vet is pretty skilled after all.

As for me, I have learned to keep my mouth shut, to listen and, most of all, to relax. My friends and I will likely never agree on what's best for our pets. But as long as the results are the same -- happy, healthy and long-lived pets -- who am I to say that my way is the only way, no matter how many experts I have in my corner?

My trips to south Georgia teach me many things, but there's one thing my friends and I would agree on without question: The first and most important part of caring for a pet is love.

When you leave from such a starting place, it's hard to head in the wrong direction.

PETS ON THE WEB

If you're interested in becoming a veterinarian, finding the nearest school or college of veterinary medicine, or tapping into recent trends in the profession, the Association of American Veterinary Medical Colleges (www.aavmc.org) is worth a double click. Lots of good stuff is here, both in information and in links, but perhaps the most fascinating page is all about statistics. One number you'll find there that is sure to tell a story in years to come: 72.4, which is the percentage of veterinary school applicants who are women.

THE SCOOP

Cats crave warmth. And with winter fast approaching, it's essential to check and double check to make sure your cats -- or any cats -- haven't gotten into warm places that could cost them their lives. Two common cat-killers: car engines and electric dryers.

Car engines stay warm long after they're shut off, and cats will sometimes creep into the engine compartment to snuggle in. If they're still there when the key is turned, they can be injured or killed. As for dryers, cats have been known to crawl in to enjoy a pile of freshly dried clothes, only to be trapped when someone adds clothes without noticing the cat and turns on the machine again.

Prevention is easy: Thump a few times on the hood of your car before starting it to frighten away any hiding cat. And get in the habit of making sure your dryer has nothing in it but clothing before you turn it on.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: We are a family of four and have a 4-year-old cocker spaniel. During the week we leave our home between 7 and 7:30 a.m. Our little dog is home by herself, and I feel bad that we have to leave her. I leave on a television or radio for her and make sure she has water and food. Is there anything more we can do for her? I feel that she is lonesome during the day and that we are somehow mistreating her. I feel that keeping her in is kind of cruel and that I should come home at noon to let her out. But the time spent commuting back home doesn't permit it. What do you think? -- W.D., via e-mail

A: What do I think about your commute? Clearly, you need to quit your job, find one within a five-minute drive or -- better yet -- arrange to work at home.

Wait! I'm kidding.

Dogs and cats are very flexible. If you make sure their needs are met, they can cope with almost anything. That's why you can find perfectly contented pets living in apartments in Manhattan and on farms in Kansas, with single people, doting couples and families with children. They can adjust to owners who work nights, days and weekends, and who travel frequently. And they can even adjust to such ne'er-do-wells as pet columnists who spend most of their days at home.

Although I'm certainly happier spending my days in the company of my three dogs and my parrot, they were just as content when I was trudging to an office. They spend their days pretty much the same way with me at home as they did when I was gone every day -- they sleep. They don't wear watches, and they never glance at the clock on the microwave. One hour is about the same as eight to them, since they haven't the concept of time that we do.

I'm assuming that your dog isn't showing any signs of separation anxiety, such as leaving piles of poop, clawing windows or doors, or ripping apart your sofa. If you're not seeing any problems, she's probably sleeping the day away. (If she is having problems, talk to your veterinarian about a referral to a trainer or behaviorist, as well as about some new medications that might help.)

Your dog would appreciate a midday trip to the yard, or a dog door that allowed her access. If that's not possible, though, she's fine until you get home. She's clearly one of the lucky ones to have a family that cares about her as much as yours does.

Q: I always hear different things about how a cat ages: that one year of its life equals seven of a human life, or that a 1-year-old cat is like an adult of 18. Then you add six years thereafter for each year it is alive.

Could you tell me how to calculate the "human" age of a cat. I currently have two. One is 17 and the other is 12. -- S.C., via e-mail

Q: As faithful readers of your column, we know that some time ago you had an item on calculating the age of a cat in human years. We failed to save the article. We have two 18-year-old cats. They are still doing great for that many years, in spite of kidney and hyperthyroidism problems. Can you tell us how to compute their age? -- J.J.H., via e-mail

A: Count the first year of a cat's life as being comparable to the time a human reaches the early stages of adulthood -- the age of 15 or so. Like a human adolescent, a 1-year-old cat looks fairly grown up and is physically capable of becoming a parent but is lacking in emotional maturity.

The second year of a cat's life picks up some of that maturity and takes a cat to the first stages of full adulthood in humans -- a 2-year-old cat is roughly equivalent to a person in her mid-20s. From there, a "four equals one" rule works pretty well.

With such a formula, the 12-year-old cat is roughly equal to a 65-year-old human. The 17-year-old cat is similar to an 85-year-old human, and the two 18-year-olds are doing very well indeed for being the equivalent of almost 90.

I love to hear about older cats. When I was young -- six to eight years ago in "cat years" -- disease, cars and other calamities seemed to take most cats at young ages. Modern preventive care combined with more cats being kept indoors has changed things. As a result, I'm no longer surprised to hear of cats in their late teens.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

Why do so many of us end up with ill-behaved dogs? The mechanics of dog training aren't difficult, after all, and it's not as if there aren't a million books, videotapes, seminars and training classes available. And yet most people end up with a dog who's "sort of" trained -- not very trained at all, in other words.

So what's the problem? I've always felt it was a matter of attitude. How you approach dog training has a great deal to do with how much you're going to accomplish. View it not as horrid chore, but as an opportunity to strengthen the bond between you and your dog. You'll have a better chance at succeeding, and you'll both have a much better time.

Don't think of training as a "you vs. your dog" endeavor. Training is about teaching, showing your dog the things he needs to learn to be a member of human society. You need to approach the task with love and respect for your dog, both of which he will return in kind.

Training isn't about six Thursday nights at a group class in the park and you're done, forever. Learning and practice need to become part of your dog's life, and that means your dog needs to be part of your life. So bring him in! Let him sleep in your bedroom and practice his "sits" in the kitchen. The more opportunities for interaction and practice you have, the faster your dog will learn and the more reliably he will respond.

You need to be positive in your training. Who likes a boss who's always ready to pounce on every misdeed? You don't, and neither does your dog. Positive reinforcement is essential to your dog's learning process. If all you ever do is tell your dog "no," your relationship isn't going to be a very good one.

Praise is cheap -- free, in fact! -- so use it a lot. Use praise when your dog's trying to get it right. Use it more when your dog's succeeding. Use it when your dog's just paying attention to you, because it's all connected. Reward the small stuff and bigger things will follow. Be a fun person to be around, and your dog will love you for it.

And what about punishment? Here, too, people make some serious mistakes. Your dog needs -- craves -- structure in his life, and you need to provide it. But you also need to know how to respond when his pushes the limits, which he will. A correction should never be a release of anger, a clearing out of pent-up feelings by unloading them on the apparent cause of the problem, your dog. Instead, a correction is another way to communicate with your dog, to foster in him a clear understanding of his place in your human pack. As such, a proper correction is another way to strengthen the bond between you and your pet. "Punishment" could be as simple as the withholding of praise or using a distraction to stop the offending behavior and redirect your dog. Yelling at or hitting your pet isn't communication. It's abuse.

Are you being fair in what you ask of your dog? How would you feel about a boss who kept changing the names of your tasks or asked you to do two things at once? Or had different rules for different places and times? It would drive you nuts, wouldn't it? And yet, that's exactly what people do to their dogs all of the time. Once your dog knows a command, use it the same way each time and never change its meaning. Be clear and be consistent.

What do I mean by consistent? One example I hear all the time is when someone says "sit down" to a dog when he really means "sit." Now, you know that when someone says "sit down" to you, it's the same thing as "sit." But if you teach your dog "sit" as one behavior and "down" as another, you can understand why "sit down" is confusing. Which do you want? Sit? Or down? Same for saying "down" when you really mean "off." I was visiting someone once when her cocker spaniel jumped on the couch beside me. "Down!" commanded her owner, and the dog laid down beside me, wagging her tail proudly. "She's so willful," said the woman, who didn't realize the dog had in fact obeyed her perfectly.

Keep training, and don't be shy about getting help over the rough patches by finding a good trainer or behaviorist. Dog training succeeds by degrees and by creativity. You expand the length of time and the number of situations in which your dog will execute a command, and you look for new ways to use what he knows so you can continue to develop and strengthen the bond between you.

So build, a little bit at a time, celebrating every step along the way. Living is learning, and learning is good.

PETS ON THE WEB

Electronic postcards are great fun to send and receive, and more sites with them pop up every day. They're easy to use. Just go to the Web site, pick your card, then type in your message and the e-mail address of the recipient. The site will issue an e-mail that invites the recipient to pick up the card, and it's free. My current favorite e-card site is Action Cat (www.actioncat.com). The collection includes animated e-cards of cats (and a few dogs) using the computer, watching the stars, or, my favorite, unrolling tissue paper in the bathroom. The cards just make you smile, so share one!

THE SCOOP

Birds have a reputation as easy-to-care-for pets. And even though that might be true of small aviary birds such as finches, it's not true of those birds who need human interaction -- the parrots, from the tiniest budgie on up. Although these charmers are quite capable of entertaining themselves while you're off earning the bird food, they cannot abandoned for days at a time. How would you like to be left with food growing more stale by the minute, water forming a skin (or worse, if your bird poops in the water dish), and a toilet you cannot flush? Alone overnight is probably fine. But anything more than that, you should arrange for boarding or call a pet-sitter. Make sure your choice is someone who's comfortable with birds. Avian veterinarians and reputable bird shops are good choices for boarding; they're used to birds, after all. A pet-sitter who deals only in dogs and cats may find a large parrot intimidating, so be sure to ask how the sitter is with birds, and have her over for an introduction before you decide.

QUESTIONS FROM THE PACK

Q: My male English mastiff has a skin problem. The vet told me that it is allergies. His skin gets these huge black spots that are reddish and scabby. His hair is falling out. He also scratches himself. I asked if change in diet would help, and the vet said "no." I am desperate for an answer. Are there veterinarians out there who specialize in skin problems? -- I.D., via e-mail

A: Yes, there are veterinary specialists who deal with skin problems. If your veterinarian hasn't been able to come up with something to help your dog, it may be time to get a dermatologist involved.

Dermatology specialists are veterinarians who undergo additional training and rigorous testing before they are certified by the American College of Veterinary Dermatology. Fewer than 100 veterinarians are certified in this specialty in the United States, Canada and Australia, so it might take some doing to find one. Your best bet, if your veterinarian cannot provide a referral, is to check with your closest school of veterinary medicine.

Another option is to have your veterinarian consult with the specialist on your behalf. Consulting has been done routinely by phone for years, and more recently online through vets-only services such as the Veterinary Information Network, which has specialists on staff for consultation by member veterinarians.

Discuss your concerns with your veterinarian, and push her to go further in getting help for your dog, whether through consultations or a referral to a specialist.

Q: Jack, the cat, has received wet cat food as well as dry for a year since he adopted me from the pound. I have been short on cash for these last two months, so I have just been giving him dry food. Jack, the cat, is eating regularly but is protesting -- I can see it in his eyes. He is also is taking up eating human food, which is new for him. I do not want this to continue. Is wet food the only option? -- C.T., via e-mail

A: How about a compromise? Offer dry food as his main ration, keeping it available constantly, and offer a small amount of canned every morning (or evening, if you prefer). A tablespoon or two will do, as a special treat.

Store unused canned food in the refrigerator, covered or wrapped, but bring it to room temperature before offering -- a quick zap in the microwave will do the trick. Warming food makes it smell better to your cat and decreases any tendency toward finickiness.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies," "Cats for Dummies" and "Birds for Dummies." She is also affiliated with the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or send e-mail to writetogina(at)spadafori.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600