In Roger Tabor's opinion, cats would be better off if we left them largely alone to run their own affairs. We should feed them, pet them and make sure their health needs are met, he says, but when it comes to breeding them, the British biologist, author and television host has advice for cat-lovers everywhere: Don't meddle so much.

"The minute you disassociate form from function you've got a problem," says Tabor, the author of "Understanding Cats: Their History, Nature and Behavior" (Reader's Digest Books) and host of a PBS series with the same name that has been popping up on stations around the country. He argues that the thoroughly random-bred domestic cat -- which the British endearingly call "moggies" -- is about as perfectly adapted an animal as can be found anywhere. "Once you get to the point where you are selecting and breeding cats for showing, that inevitably leads to extremes."

Extremes are everywhere in the world of purebred cats, he says, from the near-hairless Sphynx to the unusual ears of the Scottish fold or American curl to the short-legged body of the Munchkin. These cat breeds were all developed from spontaneous mutations that natural selection would arguably have eliminated, coaxed to breed status by those smitten by the novelty factor.

"Mutation selection is the worst problem," says Tabor. "If there were a surgical procedure to do this, the veterinarian and breeder would be facing cruelty charges."

Don't think that his criticism ends with those breeds based on mutation, though, because Tabor has a few things to say about our handling of such naturally developed, long-established breeds as the Persian and the Siamese.

"Through this very slow process of breeding, year after year, as cats go to (the) show bench, they change," he says. "In Persians, that means a larger head and a flatter nose, animals with breathing problems and problems with their teeth. Some of these cats have noses so flat they're behind the eye line, and that means problems with tear ducts.

"When we were filming the series, I saw a cat with tears that were flowing freely within seconds of going to the show ring. A lot of these cats are on antibiotics daily. This is bizarre."

Nor is he any fan of the modern Siamese, a slender cat a long way from the stockier "apple-headed" variety most people still think of when they think "Siamese."

"I would argue for the Siamese apple-head," he says. "What happened if you go back 30 years is you'll find that people began to want to go for a stranger, more exotic-looking cat. They wanted something more 'oriental-looking' than the real thing.

"Today's Siamese don't look healthy. There are breeding problems, where you've gone for thinner and thinner cats."

It probably won't come a much of a surprise that Tabor's views aren't exactly popular with some segments of the cat-showing crowd.

He doesn't much care.

"We need to take off the glasses and look from the animal's point of view. If we are causing them distress by what we're doing, then the morality issue comes into it. If the animals look pretty in your eyes, but you stand back and you can't say you've improved it in health and welfare, then it's not right."

Although admitting his fondness for the random-bred cat -- "I'm a moggy man," he says -- Tabor believes healthy purebreds are attainable, as long as health, not just looks, is the goal of breeding programs. He says his cause isn't lost, if people will listen -- and act. "We can turn things around. It's possible to have cats that look good and are healthy as well.

"But at the end of the day, I'm not God. I have no power in organizations. People can disregard my views; I just offer them for what they're worth."

When a cat-lover and scientist of Tabor's stature offers them, they're worth a lot.

Pets on the Web: The Animal Welfare Act is the federal government's landmark piece of legislation governing the care of animals, especially those in commercial settings such as laboratories, circuses and zoos, and large-scale breeding operations. The Animal Welfare Information Center (http://www.nal.usda.gov/awic) offers the complete text of the act, as well as information on updates and publications.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies" and "Cats for Dummies," and is the editorial director of the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or e-mail to Giori(at)aol.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

The first step in turning an adult dog into a reliable house pet is to embrace a key concept: There's no such thing as a "partially" house-trained dog. He either is or he isn't.

Why is realizing this important? Because if you have a dog who is "sometimes" reliable, you have a dog who really isn't getting the picture, probably because no one took the time to teach it to him properly in the first place. To do that, you're going to have to go back to square one.

Before you do, though, make sure you're not dealing with a sick dog. If you have a pet who was perfectly house-trained and is no longer, you must determine that what you have is really a behavior problem, not a health problem. So check with your veterinarian first. To be fair, if you've just adopted an adult dog who seems to be urinating all the time, you should have him checked out, too, before assuming he's not house-trained. If everything is fine, you can start training.

House-training an adult dog uses the same principles as with a puppy, except you have to be even more diligent because with an adult you'll be doing some untraining, too.

You need to teach your dog what's right before you can correct him for what's wrong. To do this, spend a couple of weeks ensuring he has nothing but successes by never giving him the opportunity to make a mistake. Here's how:

-- Leash him to you in the house, so you can monitor his every move during his training period. If he starts to mess, correct him with a sharp "no," take him outside, give a "go" command -- I use "hurry up" -- and praise him for doing right.

-- Confine him in a shipping crate whenever he's not on a leash with you. You can buy a crate at any pet-supply store; choose one that's just a little bit bigger than your dog. Dogs don't like to mess where they're sleeping, and most will quickly learn to "hold it" when crated.

-- Take him outside first thing in the morning, as soon as you get home from work, and just before you go to bed, when you put him in his crate for the night. Always remember to give your "go" command, and praise when he does as you wish.

The most difficult part of house-training an adult dog is your attitude toward limiting his options in such a way as to make success possible. You may not like the idea of keeping such close tabs on your dog, but bear in mind you won't need to do it forever. Crates and leashes are training tools, not lifelong crutches.

If you've been consistent, your dog will likely have a good idea of what's expected of him at the end of the two weeks, and so you can start to give him a little freedom. Don't let him have the run of the house yet. Keep his area small and let him earn the house, room by room, under your supervision, as he proves his understanding of the house rules.

Accidents will happen. If you catch him, correct him with a sharp "no," take him outside and give him the chance to set things right. Give your "go" command, and praise if he does. Clean up the mess promptly and thoroughly, so he won't feel so inclined to refresh his smell there.

If you aren't catching him messing, you're not keeping close enough tabs on him. Go back to the crate and leash and start over.

Consistency and patience are necessary for house-training an adult dog. If you have both, you will likely succeed. Without them, you'll have a very difficult time getting the results you're hoping for.

Pets on the Web: Like many other animal-lovers, I'm a sucker for animal gear. Stuffed animals, wind chimes, ceramics, books, key chains -- I've got it all. I even have a few stamps, which was why I was happy to trip across a Web site for pet-loving stamp collectors. One site for stamp collectors has a page dedicated to animals, at http://www.philately.com/thematic_index.htm. From there, you can click on pages for birds, cats, dogs and other animals. It's a great place to get interested in collecting stamps with animals on them.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies" and "Cats for Dummies," and is the editorial director of the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or e-mail to Giori(at)aol.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600

As pet-lovers, we always need to keep in mind one of the basic facts of life: Not everyone loves animals the way we do. And even those who do can find the antics of other people's pets a little hard to bear at times.

If I didn't know this already, I was reminded recently by a trio of letters from people complaining about neighbors' pets: screaming parrots in an outdoor aviary, a tomcat who terrorizes the neighborhood felines, and a dog let out every morning to leave "gifts" on other people's lawns.

These pets have two things in common. First, they're doing what is only natural to them. Second, they have owners who aren't thinking about their neighbors. Pet owners who don't think of their neighbors are more than rude; they're a threat to those of us who always want to have animals in our lives, since these owners give plenty of ammunition to those who would be happy to see animals banned -- or at least highly restricted.

Responsible pet ownership is the only antidote for anti-pet sentiments. The good news is that doesn't take a lot of effort to keep everyone happy. Here are the rules:

-- Keep 'em quiet. Barking dog or screaming parrots, the answer is the same: Keep your pets inside, especially at night and on weekend mornings. Pet-lovers have a tendency to become selectively deaf, tuning out the noisefest of their own pets and even sleeping through the racket. Although you can manage such a trick, your neighbors shouldn't have to.

-- Keep 'em under control. The only way to accomplish this with cats is to keep them inside. The bonus for you: Your cat will live a longer, healthier life. Outdoor cats fight noisily for mates and territory (neutering helps, but not completely), pick up and spread deadly diseases, and are exposed to hazards such as cars, coyotes and cat-hating neighbors with traps.

As for dogs, keep them fenced or on a leash and off other people's property, always. In public areas where it's OK for a game of fetch, train your dog to be under your voice control, or put him on a long lead instead. Never let him bother other people or pets.

-- Keep it clean. Pick up after your dog, whether or not it's required by local ordinance. I never understand why people who wouldn't think of tossing an empty cup on a neighbor's lawn think nothing of leaving something much more vile. Don't step out of your house with your dog unless you have plastic bags in your pocket for cleanups. Pickup is easy. Put the bag over your hand like a mitten, pick up the poop and turn the bag inside-out with the mess inside. Pop the sealed packet in the nearest garbage can and you're done.

The only way to keep your cat's mess out of your neighbor's flower beds is to keep him inside. If that's not possible, keep a clean litter box for your cat anyway. If you don't offer him a litter box, you're guaranteeing he has to relieve himself outside.

Make the effort to be a responsible pet owner. Keeping your neighbors happy is the right thing to do, and it's the only way to protect your own interest in being able to spend your life with the animals you love.

PETS ON THE WEB: Guinea pigs aren't just for children anymore. Many adults keep these sweet, cuddly critters, and it's no surprise there are plenty of Web pages dedicated to them. My favorite is Smilin' Jay Andrews Oinker Net, at http://www.olywa.net/jandrews/oinkrnet.htm. Andrews is a disc jockey in Olympia, Wash., but it's clear his true love is guinea pigs. His page has links to guinea pig sites all over the world, basic care information and lots of pictures. Check out the pictures of his pigs in their condos, two-stories dwellings with 16 square feet of living space and a running track. One of the nicest things about these pets is the sound they make, and Andrews' site has sound files to brighten the lives of those who have never heard it. Wheek, wheek, wheek (three cheers, guinea pig-style) to this charming page.

Gina Spadafori is the award-winning author of "Dogs for Dummies" and "Cats for Dummies," and is the editorial director of the Veterinary Information Network Inc., an international online service for veterinary professionals. Write to her in care of this newspaper, or e-mail to Giori(at)aol.com.

4520 Main St., Kansas City, Mo. 64111; (816) 932-6600