I joke about how grateful I'll be to hand the car keys to our children and relinquish my role as chauffeur.

But behind that false bravado lies an anxious fear so many parents feel when a child is finally old enough to drive. We are handing them the keys to a machine that could potentially be lethal. And having been teenagers once ourselves, we remember that dangerous sense of invincibility.

So, we make sure they learn the fundamentals of how to drive. They have to pass a written test, a road test and an eyesight exam. We never let them ride without seat belts. We talk to them about the dangers of drunken driving and texting while driving. We establish the rules.

This year, more Americans are likely to die of gunshot wounds than car accidents.

There were 33,804 motor vehicle deaths in 2013, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. There were 33,636 firearm deaths that year. Analysis by Bloomberg predicted that those numbers will soon flip, based on 10-year trends.

Similarly, a report last year by the Center for American Progress predicted gun deaths for teens and young adults are on track to surpass motor vehicle traffic deaths this year.

Gun violence disproportionately impacts teens and young adults. But lacking clear-cut conversations like those about car safety, how do parents begin to talk to teenagers and young adults about possible encounters with firearms? Which circumstances increase their risk of being victimized, and what can be done to lower those risks?

Despite news reports, our children are not very likely to encounter a shooter at a school, college, movie theater or shopping mall.

Rather, a confrontation with someone they know -- a personal relationship, a former boyfriend or spouse, a family member, an acquaintance -- is more likely to result in gun violence. And more than half of firearm-related fatalities are suicides.

Jeffrey Swanson, professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Duke University School of Medicine, is co-editor of a special issue on gun violence to be published next month in Behavioral Sciences and the Law. He is a co-author on a new research study that finds "a distressingly large number of seriously angry people with guns -- often multiple guns -- living in our communities."

Their analysis of data from the National Comorbidity Survey looks at the responses when interview subjects were asked whether they had serious anger outbursts, such as losing their temper, smashing and breaking things, or getting in physical fights. Responses were combined with information from another section of the survey about possessing or carrying firearms.

"It comes to 10 percent of this (nationally representative) sample of adults who have impulsive, angry behavior and access to guns," he said. They are mostly young to middle-aged men, Swanson said.

Teens and young adults should know this and understand the implications of that risk.

"The presence of a weapon dramatically increases the probability of a death, and guns are so much more efficient at killing people," said Harold Pollack, professor of Social Service Administration and Public Health Sciences at the University of Chicago. "One of the most serious risks is of suicide of a family member because a firearm is available. It's a much more common problem than an intruder who seeks to kill you."

He spoke more bluntly about the responsibility of parents in such cases: "If I had a teenage son who was depressed, that would weigh very highly in my personal calculation of whether I'd want to have a firearm in my home."

If a child or adult is going through a rough patch, seek a safe place to store a firearm well outside his or her reach. In a few places, guns can be legally removed from those family members believed to be a risk to themselves or others. Pollack pointed out that some gun ranges have smart interventions to try to identify people at risk for suicide.

"These are done by people who are often very strong supporters of gun rights, but care a lot about the safety of people," he said.

Accidental or unintentional gun deaths are not limited to young children.

While brandishing a weapon is illegal in all states, showing it in an intimidating or impressionable way can also be a crime. Take it seriously and report it to police.

Even in states in which it's legal to openly carry or concealed-carry a gun, a person entering your living space can be asked not to carry a weapon onto private property -- or be asked to leave. If the person refuses, he or she can be arrested for trespassing.

Changes in public policy, attitudes and behaviors have been successful at lowering the rate of car fatalities for young people. Rather than becoming desensitized to this high level of gun violence, parents can use this heightened awareness to start a conversation. We need to be more proactive in talking to our children about a machine that may soon kill more of their peers than a car.

Whenever a child comes to my house for the first time, I make a point to ask the parent if the child has any food allergies.

If the child did have a life-threatening allergy, the parent would probably offer that information unprompted. But it's become such a part of the parenting culture to inquire -- a prerequisite for playdates or sleepovers.

Statistically speaking, however, a child is more likely to be accidentally shot and killed by a firearm than die of an allergic reaction to a peanut. And yet the conversation about guns among friends, neighbors and relatives has not become as routine.

While food allergies have been internalized as a public risk and childhood epidemic, the same cannot be said about guns.

More than 3,000 children and teens, up to age 19, are shot unintentionally each year on average, according to the Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence.

In 2013, there were 108 accidental firearm deaths for those 18 years old and younger, according to data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The CDC does not specifically track peanut allergy deaths, but recorded 21 food-allergy-related deaths -- children and adults -- in that same year.

When looking at the totality of all firearm-related deaths for children and teens -- not just accidental ones -- the number is obviously much higher.

In 2010, there were 2,711 infant, child and teen firearm deaths. Writer Evan DeFilippis put this in perspective in an essay about the impact of firearms on children: "More American children and teenagers died from gunfire in 2010 -- a single year -- than U.S. troops in Afghanistan since 2001."

Has any parent ever asked me if we have a firearm in the house before entrusting me with their child? No. I've hosted countless children, and I've never been asked that question.

Catherine Mortensen, a spokeswoman for the National Rifle Association and mother of a 17-year-old daughter and 12-year-old son, says she and her husband have been gun owners since before their children were born. Their children have grown up shooting and are comfortable around firearms.

"I've never had a parent ask" about how their weapons are secured, she said.

But she wouldn't be offended if anyone did, she added. "I would tell them the truth: We do have firearms in the home. They are safely stored in a safe away from the children. They are inaccessible."

Becky Morgan of St. Louis also has two teenagers, and is the Missouri chapter lead for Moms Demand Action for Gun Sense in America. She said that recent high-profile news stories about accidental shooting deaths prompted her to ask the parents of her children's friends about firearms.

"You don't want to hurt anyone's feelings and you don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable," she said. "But I would hate for something to happen, and I didn't ask because I was uncomfortable."

So far, every conversation she has had on the topic has gone smoothly. None of the parents she's talked to have owned a firearm, which makes the follow-up much easier for her. She said if she did encounter a family with guns in the house, she would ask to have the friend come visit at her home instead.

While the NRA says it's a personal decision for gun owners to decide how to store guns, they do advise keeping firearms "inaccessible to unauthorized users," Mortensen said.

The way to reduce the risk of children and teen gun deaths is to store guns unloaded and locked, and to store ammunition separately, also locked. And teach your kids these simple instructions if they ever encounter a firearm: Assume it's loaded. Don't touch it. Leave the area and tell an adult immediately.

The topic falls naturally into a wider conversation about safety concerns, said Danielle Alperin, program manager at the Brady Center.

"It's something we've found people kind of worry might be uncomfortable or awkward, but it could save a child's life," she said. Plus, their research found there's little if any resistance among gun owners to these questions. A responsible gun owner will want to tell you it's safely stored.

Once a parent has that information, it's up to them to decide how to act on it, depending on their comfort level, she said.

I've had to ask a close family member and longtime friends about their gun storage, after learning that the families owned guns. I do believe the people in my life who keep firearms in their homes are responsible adults who would do anything to keep their children, and my own, safe.

But I've decided that if I can casually ask about lethal peanuts, I can ask a few direct questions about a weapon designed to kill.

Rejection season is nearly upon us.

While it used to be a rite of passage for 17- and 18-year-old high school seniors, younger and younger children are now facing the admissions process.

Parents have pushed for more choices in education, and there's a growing number of magnet and charter schools to serve public school students. With these choices comes greater responsibility for parents to research the options, maneuver through the maze of alternatives and then handle the application process.

But there's a trickle-down effect of constantly competing. Welcome to today's high-stakes childhood, where children as young as third and fourth grade are enrolled in private test-prep classes to give them an edge on standardized test scores. Fifth- or sixth-graders apply to middle schools. Eighth-graders try for the best high schools. Seniors wait for college decisions, many of which should be arriving in the next several weeks.

Families with the time and resources to compete for selective institutions have always done so. With the rise of competitive public school options and a greater willingness to invest in childhood enrichment, that pressure is not just confined to elites. Meanwhile, a third of teens reported feeling overwhelmed by stress, and just as many expected their stress to increase, according to a recent survey by the American Psychological Association.

Children navigate social rejection almost daily: Someone doesn't want to play with them on the playground or sit with them at lunch or invite them to their party. It's an essential part of life to learn to cope with the feelings those moments provoke.

What is the right age to face institutional rejection? Does it make more of an impact at a younger age, or are young kids impervious to the expectations we create in our heads as we get older?

For those who might be facing their first serious setback in the coming weeks, it's good to keep such stumbling blocks in perspective.

Annie Fox, author of "The Girls' Q&A Book on Friendship: 50 Ways to Fix a Friendship Without the Drama," says rejection can be character-building if parents deal with it in a positive way.

"Acknowledge what (children) are feeling," she said. A child may feel hurt, "less than" or that the decision isn't fair. "Be empathetic. Share a story when you may have experienced the same," Fox said. Maybe there was a time when you didn't make a team, get a part or a promotion that required a lot of hard work. It's helpful to talk about how those disappointments opened doors to other opportunities.

Setbacks create chances to do things that would not have been possible if a first-choice plan had worked out.

For children who have access to a good-enough education, having a positive attitude and resiliency have been proven to pay off in long-term success. And, unlike a social rejection, which is intensely personal, an institutional rejection may often have to do with factors completely outside the control of an applicant.

You may think once you're established in your career, you're done with the rejection gauntlet. But then you have children, and face those agonizing choices and waiting games all over again. Somehow, these decisions feel even more fraught and stressful than those you made for yourself. You're responsible for giving another person their best opportunities.

It's useful to remember and appreciate the roadblocks we faced on our own journeys.

I started kindergarten in public school and graduated from the same public school system, blissfully unaware of high-stakes testing until I showed up for the SAT one Saturday morning. I only applied to two universities, remarkably similar ones. I didn't feel the sting of a significant rejection until I was either 19 or 20. Back in those heady days of print journalism, scoring an internship at a daily metro newspaper was harder than gaining admission to either college to which I applied.

I tried for internships at papers throughout the country, so I received my share of coast-to-coast rejection letters. But you know what happens when you cast a net wide enough. Eventually, something turns up.

It's the way you chase those rare triumphs through the rejections that changes the direction of your life.