Q: I'm getting close to retirement, but I don't feel "old." Still, I'm slightly concerned about how leaving the workforce might affect me. Do you have any thoughts?
Jim: The late actor George Burns -- who lived to be 100 -- once said, "You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old." I think his point was that aging gracefully requires learning how to navigate a few challenges along the way.
If we live long enough, each of us will eventually experience some painful seasons of life -- an empty nest, the death of a loved one or perhaps the necessity of leaving a home that's filled with memories. Those are significant moments that involve processing very real grief.
That's why it's critical to learn healthy ways to deal with difficult life changes. Surround yourself with supportive people who will come alongside you in your struggles. The opposite facet is just as important: Be careful about people who bring too much negativity to your life. Perhaps they're critical or try too hard to "fix" you and your circumstances. You might need to distance yourself from influences like that.
Meanwhile, an often-overlooked factor is that basic self-care can help minimize stress levels more than many people think. So be sure to get plenty of rest and exercise.
Hopefully, you have many productive years ahead of you -- you'll just be "producing" in a different way. Along those lines, there's immeasurable, life-giving value in finding ways to invest your time-won wisdom in younger generations through church, community groups and other venues.
Whether or not we live to 100, our lives can still be rich and fulfilling if we accept that even unwelcome change is an opportunity to grow. A positive, hopeful attitude is key to thriving in the new seasons of life that inevitably come along.
Q: My kids are SO tired of school, but the academic year is not over yet. What can I do to help them be motivated to finish strong?
Dr. Danny Huerta, Vice President, Parenting & Youth: The end of the school year can be tough for kids. Summer is right around the corner and motivation to finish drops. Phones, sports, work and video games can all be distractions as kids try to focus on the end of the school year.
It's perfectly normal for students to look forward to summer. But they also need to learn how to pursue responsibility when they don't feel like it.
Here are three ways you can support your child as they finish this school year:
Problem Solve Together. What motivates you? What motivates your children? Some kids may begin to struggle with anxiety and/or depression for the first time as school ends due to academic or social stress. Talk about why they may be struggling and provide necessary support.
Establish Clear Boundaries. Your kids long for clear and consistent structure and boundaries -- even if they say they don't. Talk about expectations and write down the consequences (positive and negative) that will happen if they do or don't own their responsibilities.
Compliment. Sometimes we forget how far genuine praise can go with our kids. In fact, we tend to be quick to correct and slow to compliment. Let them know you're paying attention to their decision-making. Surprise them with a compliment and fist bump, dinner out or a huge hug. Remember that this is not a reward, it's a celebration of their great decision-making.
You know your child the best, and you get to teach the lesson of powering through even when they don't feel like it. To learn more about building healthy momentum for your family, go to FocusOnParenting.com.
Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.
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