Q: I'm getting close to retirement, but I don't feel "old." Still, I'm slightly concerned about how leaving the workforce might affect me. Do you have any thoughts?

Jim: The late actor George Burns -- who lived to be 100 -- once said, "You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old." I think his point was that aging gracefully requires learning how to navigate a few challenges along the way.

If we live long enough, each of us will eventually experience some painful seasons of life -- an empty nest, the death of a loved one or perhaps the necessity of leaving a home that's filled with memories. Those are significant moments that involve processing very real grief.

That's why it's critical to learn healthy ways to deal with difficult life changes. Surround yourself with supportive people who will come alongside you in your struggles. The opposite facet is just as important: Be careful about people who bring too much negativity to your life. Perhaps they're critical or try too hard to "fix" you and your circumstances. You might need to distance yourself from influences like that.

Meanwhile, an often-overlooked factor is that basic self-care can help minimize stress levels more than many people think. So be sure to get plenty of rest and exercise.

Hopefully, you have many productive years ahead of you -- you'll just be "producing" in a different way. Along those lines, there's immeasurable, life-giving value in finding ways to invest your time-won wisdom in younger generations through church, community groups and other venues.

Whether or not we live to 100, our lives can still be rich and fulfilling if we accept that even unwelcome change is an opportunity to grow. A positive, hopeful attitude is key to thriving in the new seasons of life that inevitably come along.

Q: My kids are SO tired of school, but the academic year is not over yet. What can I do to help them be motivated to finish strong?

Dr. Danny Huerta, Vice President, Parenting & Youth: The end of the school year can be tough for kids. Summer is right around the corner and motivation to finish drops. Phones, sports, work and video games can all be distractions as kids try to focus on the end of the school year.

It's perfectly normal for students to look forward to summer. But they also need to learn how to pursue responsibility when they don't feel like it.

Here are three ways you can support your child as they finish this school year:

Problem Solve Together. What motivates you? What motivates your children? Some kids may begin to struggle with anxiety and/or depression for the first time as school ends due to academic or social stress. Talk about why they may be struggling and provide necessary support.

Establish Clear Boundaries. Your kids long for clear and consistent structure and boundaries -- even if they say they don't. Talk about expectations and write down the consequences (positive and negative) that will happen if they do or don't own their responsibilities.

Compliment. Sometimes we forget how far genuine praise can go with our kids. In fact, we tend to be quick to correct and slow to compliment. Let them know you're paying attention to their decision-making. Surprise them with a compliment and fist bump, dinner out or a huge hug. Remember that this is not a reward, it's a celebration of their great decision-making.

You know your child the best, and you get to teach the lesson of powering through even when they don't feel like it. To learn more about building healthy momentum for your family, go to FocusOnParenting.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: My spouse and I have been thinking about starting a family, but we're nervous about taking the plunge. Do kids really change your life -- and your marriage -- as much as people say they do?

Jim: The short answer: yes. Children will change your life. Initially it will be mostly schedule interruptions and loss of sleep. As time goes on, you'll encounter potty training, discipline and the first day of school. Before you know it, you'll be saving for college and giving up a new car for braces.

But the more important question is the one you didn't ask: Are the changes worth it? Once again, a resounding YES! Children will bring big changes. But they also add an entirely new dimension of joy and fulfillment you can't find anywhere else.

So, if you're fearful that parenthood will be so unpleasant that you should abandon those plans, I'd strongly encourage you to reconsider. Children are more than just a responsibility and a blessing. They're also an opportunity to learn, grow and experience adventures you haven't yet even dreamed about.

Now, let's get to some practical stuff to cushion yourselves for the "shock." Start by being prepared to adjust your assumptions. You need to be open to letting go of the desire to be in control. Parenthood involves many unforeseen challenges, so you'll have to give up some of your usual activities in order to provide the structure your kids need.

You'll also need to be ready and willing to make sacrifices. Yes, you'll "lose some of your freedoms" if you choose to be parents. But don't let yourselves resent your child because of the things you gave up for their sake. If you and your spouse can't picture making sacrifices, this may not be the right time -- yet -- to have children. Most parents find the joys well worth the sacrifices, so move forward with your eyes wide open.

While you're adjusting, remember to give your marriage the attention it needs and deserves. Growth for any couple requires intentionality. Once children are in the mix, you'll have to be even more proactive about keeping your relationship strong and healthy. You'll still need outlets such as dating and spending time with friends. But those will look different than in the past. If finances are tight, try hiking, window-shopping or coffee at the kitchen table. The important thing is that you're together -- and that you don't spend the whole time talking about the baby.

Be prepared to lose sleep. During your child's infancy, you'll likely have to get up several times a night. Since both Mom and Dad are likely to be sleep-deprived, be ready to see each other at your worst. With both of you filling the roles of full-time parents and spouses, your respective flaws will probably surface more often. So, decide now to extend grace to each other and put your spouse's needs ahead of your own.

The bottom line: take heart. If you're courageous enough to tackle the challenge of raising children -- and I hope you are -- things will get easier as time goes on. The mechanics of parenting change throughout a child's life span. And remember that parenting will never be completely stress-free. But I can personally attest that there's incredible satisfaction in watching your child grow and change, and eventually developing an adult friendship with them.

Obviously, I can't touch on every aspect of this question in a limited venue like this. If you'd like some extra guidance from our staff counselors, I invite you to call 855-771-HELP (4357). Meanwhile, we have tons of practical resources for parenting and marriage at FocusOnTheFamily.com. I wish you all the best.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: I'm newly married and a soon-to-be dad. I never knew my own father. So, it's intimidating to think about teaching my son to be "manly." What does "manliness" really look like?

Jim: There's a regrettably common misperception that "manliness" equates to brute power and strength. But when it comes to being a good husband and father, I'd suggest something else. How about "sacrifice"?

I know: A lot of guys consider "sacrifice" to be weakness. That's unfortunate, because when you look at healthy families, you generally see a common trait: sacrificial men. These are the guys who show up at their kids' soccer game even if they'd rather stay home and watch football. They're patient with their children when a bike gets left in the rain for the umpteenth time. Men who sacrifice develop stronger, more loving family relationships.

Really, it's a paradox. We're at our strongest when we lay down our lives, even in small ways, for our wives and children. That's hard to do, and we don't always do it well. But that's why it's called "sacrifice." The Golden Rule says to "treat others the way you want to be treated." That often -- usually -- requires humility and sacrifice.

We fathers have to challenge ourselves to sacrifice for our families. We should not only tell them we love them. We need to show them that they're the most important people in the world to us. It could be getting home early for a date night dinner with your wife. Maybe it's curbing your temper and lovingly correcting your child when they're careless and scratch your car. Sacrifice will lead you to make significant decisions. But being a dad is a very significant experience.

For help with your fathering, visit FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Q: I think my marriage is pretty good, although my wife doesn't always do things the way I'd like. When I try to talk about such things and make suggestions, she just shuts down. Am I missing something? How can I get her to see my point of view?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: We all want our lives to function in ways that suit us. It might be our very specific coffee order or keeping our home at a certain temperature. And when something doesn't work the way we like, we usually try to control it.

Unfortunately, many people take a similar approach to marriage. Controlling behavior can often occur because one spouse doesn't feel loved and validated by the other. So, they try to control their spouse's actions to ensure they get the relationship they want. But taking charge over your spouse doesn't foster connection and love. It actually destroys it -- because control erodes the very foundation of the marital relationship, which comes from partnership and oneness.

Here's the blunt truth: If you try to control your spouse, you're in danger of losing your marriage. A spouse who feels controlled will eventually try to escape. That may be through an affair, a divorce or, at the very least, spending all their time with friends or in another part of the house.

So, here's the cure: Give up the role of "boss" and start cultivating a relationship of openness and warmth. That obviously requires give-and-take, and likely includes some compromises. It may well (probably) take the help of a professional counselor. But when a couple learns healthy ways to connect and become equals, they're on their way to a strong and healthy marriage.

If you need some help getting started and would like to talk to one of our staff counselors (which I would strongly recommend), call 855-771-HELP (4357) or visit FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.