Q: I'm a newly single parent with three kids and financial concerns. I could use some helpful insights -- any thoughts?

Jim: I'm sorry to hear about your situation. You'll need to consider three key questions: 1) What do I need to do and when? 2) How can I meet my needs and my children's needs? 3) Most importantly, whom can I trust for advice?

Newly single adults often make major changes -- financial and otherwise -- much too quickly out of insecurity. Whether you're divorced or widowed, I suggest you seek out a personal adviser who you can trust to have your best interests at heart. This individual doesn't necessarily need to be a professional financial expert. Nor do they have to be a family member or friend. You can find someone to help with money management later; what you're really looking for right now is somebody with experience and wisdom.

It's possible that another widowed or divorced person might turn out to be the best candidate for the role. If nothing else, they could be in a position to direct you to other helpers. You might also ask your pastor for recommendations. And it could be a very good idea to enlist more than one personal adviser.

Whatever you do, remember that you're still the decision maker. You cannot abdicate that responsibility -- ultimately, it's up to you to sift out bad advice from the good. So, seek out the best counsel you can find.

Finally, whether a person loses a spouse through divorce or death, grief can impair one's ability to make prudent decisions -- especially within the first year following the loss. If possible, defer major decisions for the first 12 months or so.

Our staff counselors would be happy to offer encouragement and insight. I invite you to call 855-771-HELP (4357) for a free consultation.

Q: We try to start new chores and rules in the new year, but nothing seems to stick. How do I help my kids follow through?

Dr. Danny Huerta, Vice President, Parenting & Youth: For many families, the beginning of the new year renews a common parenting struggle: The Chore Wars. Each family is unique, especially when it comes to teaching responsibility through chores.

An important factor in a child's ability to successfully complete chores is his or her personality. As a family therapist I've developed my own distinct labels to describe the four major personality types in society: Leaders, Talkers, Thinkers and Peacemakers.

Here are some tips for working with each personality type:

Leaders like to be in charge, so delegate and give them opportunities to lead in conquering chores as a family. Demonstrate to your leader child how they can be patient with tasks and work together with their siblings.

Talkers love socializing or listening to music while completing a task. They can help make chore time fun for the whole family. Encourage your talker child to experiment with organization or consistency using a chore chart.

Thinkers appreciate structure, organization and completing tasks in ways that make sense. They can help create charts and structured plans to get chores done. Help your thinker child see that imperfection is OK and encourage them to work together to get things done.

Peacemakers usually take their time and prioritize relationships over following through with tasks. Help them see that chores are a way to love others. Have them plan a relational activity you can do together once the chores are done. Your peacemaker child might tend to procrastinate, so help them take initiative with their chores.

To learn more about teaching your kids how to take responsibility with chores this year -- and to access a handy personality quiz -- go to FocusOnParenting.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Q: I'm finally at the point where I have to admit that my husband appears to have a compulsive gambling problem. It used to just be the occasional card game with the guys, but these days he has multiple online accounts and places bets each week on more sports contests than I can even follow. Do you have any insights?

Jim: Unfortunately, in the past few years gambling has come right out into the mainstream. It's no longer limited to casinos or hidden websites -- the legalization of gambling in various forms (especially sports wagering) means that you basically can't escape television commercials or social media ads touting how easy it is to gamble. In my opinion, it's part of a much larger problem in our society as vices become normalized.

Here's my take. Objective research has long shown that gambling is an especially dangerous practice with the serious potential for developing into a damaging addiction. Addictions by nature are progressive in nature; there's a direct line that can (and very often does) stretch from availability to addiction.

In other words, the easier it is to access something "on demand," the more likely for that thing to become addictive. In this case, that can play out as a sports fan checking his phone app and finding that he's several hundred dollars in the hole after a quick series of impulsive one-touch prop bets while hanging out with his buddies.

The truth is that gambling isn't as innocuous as many seem to suppose. It's actually predicated on the losses, pain and suffering of others. For one person to win at gambling, others must lose. And often the biggest losers are the gambler's closest loved ones. Families touched by a gambling addiction are at increased risk for such negative outcomes as divorce, bankruptcy, child abuse, domestic violence, crime and suicide. Gambling also exploits and preys upon the desperation of the poor. The National Gambling Impact Study Commission found that those with incomes of less than $10,000 spend more on lottery tickets than any other group, while high school dropouts spend four times as much as college graduates.

Meanwhile, there's one ironclad rule to gambling: the house (the gambling institution) ultimately comes out on top.

If your husband is a compulsive gambler, as you suspect, then it's only a matter of time before his escalating condition lands him in some serious trouble. He may very well deny that there's a problem. Dr. Robert Custer, a trailblazer in the field of gambling diagnosis and treatment, says that denial, in the psychiatric context, "means refusing to acknowledge something to oneself, getting oneself to actually believe that there is no danger at all." It's a very common mindset among those who struggle with an addiction to gambling.

That's why it's critical to confront the issue head-on. Urge your husband to get some kind of professional help. If he's unwilling to listen, see if you can enlist the help of an objective third party -- a pastor, a relative or a male friend who agrees with your assessment of the situation and who would be willing to come alongside you in order to strengthen your case.

If all else fails, try to pull together a group of friends and supporters who can help you stage a formal intervention. You may want to include a licensed counselor or therapist who specializes in this kind of activity. Overcoming addiction of any kind is a long process that requires trained guidance. Our counseling department can help direct you to qualified individuals all over the country; call 855-771-HELP (4357) or see FocusOnTheFamily.com. I wish you the best.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Q: What's your take on New Year's resolutions? Every year I make a list -- then struggle and usually give up within a few weeks. I'm already juggling so many things in life; is it even worth trying to add more?

Jim: On one hand, I believe there's a lot to be said for strategically setting a few reasonable goals and making the effort to attain them. I'd advise making them measurable ("exercise for 30 minutes three times a week" or "read one book a month") and then enlisting other people to encourage you and help you stay on track.

That said, I'd also suggest making some "non-resolutions" for the year. Non-resolutions aren't about what we decide to add to our lives. They're about all the things we decide to leave behind.

For example, a non-resolution could be resolving to not dwell on the negative events of the past year. Instead, forgive people who have hurt you and choose to move forward with a better outlook for what this coming year can hold.

Or try resolving to limit your use of technology. Make the decision that this year you're going to cut back on phone and text messages to emphasize face-to-face communication and one-on-one time with your family.

Another idea: Don't let mistakes you've made over the past 12 months determine how the next 12 months will go. Handle whatever consequences you may be facing, but don't wallow in regret -- learn from your mistakes and get on with your life.

In short, living well is just as much about what we choose to leave behind as it is what we choose to add. I'm reminded of the quote that says, "Our strength doesn't come from desperately hanging on, but from gracefully letting go." So, as you think about resolutions for this year, consider including a few non-resolutions as well.

Q: My wife and I realized this past year that after many years of marriage, we're just ... bored. We still love each other and are committed to the relationship. We want to make positive changes this coming year, but we feel stuck. Is this just the way marriage goes for everyone?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: Let me share an analogy. Think back over the past few weeks -- say, since Thanksgiving -- and consider all the great food you have probably enjoyed. That freshly roasted turkey just out of the oven with stuffing, gravy and pumpkin pie. Or those delicious cookies that melted in your mouth. Pretty nice, huh?

But after a few days, and the fifth straight meal of leftover turkey chased down with almost-stale cookies ... maybe not so much. There's still plenty of food left, but you're losing interest and tired of the same thing. The containers of excess food get pushed to the back of the fridge.

Marriage can be a lot like that. As newlyweds you probably spent most of your free time together. But like most of us, as life settled into a routine, you started settling for leftovers. The passion and excitement were replaced by the mundane. From there, the relationship got pushed further and further into the background of life.

The answer is to take action in your marriage. Make it the main dish in life's banquet, using fresh ingredients. In other words, resolve this year to make your relationship THE priority. Date your wife. Do things outside your normal, everyday routine to revive the freshness your relationship once had. New hobbies, service projects, getaway weekends, education -- do things together. I might humbly suggest my book Take the Date Night Challenge, or you can find plenty of ideas to help your marriage thrive at FocusOnTheFamily.com.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.