Q: Should I be concerned that my husband of three months no longer wants to do everything together? Since marrying in April, we've had the time of our lives -- just the two of us. But today, he opted to go hiking with a couple of his guy friends instead of going shopping with me.

Jim: Although romance novels and poetry are marketed and sold on the idea that "my spouse is my everything," couples who buy into -- and won't let go of -- this belief are usually doomed to be miserable. The truth is that it's impossible for one person to meet our every need. I learned that the hard way.

When my wife, Jean, and I were first married, we spent a lot of time together, traveling to high schools around the country to encourage kids to avoid drugs. It was a great season in our lives and -- being an extrovert -- I loved the constant interaction.

But Jean is an introvert. She enjoyed the work we did in schools as much as I did, but she felt drained by all the people. One afternoon, she headed out the hotel door for some groceries. I asked to tag along, but she said, "Jim, I love you, but I'd really like to be alone." Initially, I was hurt. But I soon realized that she needed time alone to recharge her batteries. Once I learned to give Jean some breathing room, not only did she reap the benefits -- but our marriage did as well.

Your husband can't meet your every need, so fill those spaces with other healthy activities. Have good friendships, pursue hobbies you find satisfying, or simply enjoy a little solitude. Give each other reasonable room to breathe, and you'll find your times together will be even richer.

Q: My preteen daughter has developed a real talent and love for dancing. We signed her up for classes six months ago, and she's having the time of her life. Aside from her exceptional ability, she's made some special friends and has blossomed with confidence. The problem is the music she's dancing to. It's inappropriate for someone her age, and I sense that her instructor wouldn't be receptive to changing it. But with all the positive benefits of her involvement in class, we're hesitant to pull her out. How should we handle the situation?

Bob Waliszewski, Director, Plugged-In: It's great to hear your daughter has discovered an activity she enjoys and that is well-suited to her skills and interests. That said, I can appreciate the mixed emotions you're feeling because of the inappropriate music that's been a part of the experience.

Sadly, it's no longer unusual for kids or adults to be held hostage to the R-rated playlists of musical gatekeepers, whether at the grocery store, sporting events or on the school bus. Adding to this concern is the fact that numerous studies have concluded that suggestive and risque music shapes teen and preteen sexual values and behaviors. What's a responsible parent to do?

While your impressions regarding the instructor's receptivity may be on target, I'd still encourage you to approach him or her respectfully and privately to express your concern. Bring printed copies of the song lyrics. It's quite possible that, like many of us, the instructor has never really heard the messages behind the music and maybe will make changes upon being made aware. You could also suggest a list of alternative tunes with similar musical elements -- minus the racy content.

If your concerns fall on deaf ears, however, then I'd suggest the loving response would be to find another dance option for your daughter. Aren't her heart, mind and soul worth it?

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: Our son graduated from high school this spring, and we're really struggling with what his next step should be. We want to offer him the prospect of a bright future, but formal education has never been his forte. He's very gifted mechanically and enthusiastically works on our cars and projects around the house. But his friends are all headed off to college, and it seems he should do the same. What are your thoughts?

Jim: I can appreciate the emotions behind the decision you (and many other families) are facing. You and your son are standing at one of life's biggest forks in the road: Should he go on to college or take another route?

The truth is college isn't for everybody. Did you know that 46 percent of young people who start college never finish? Sometimes it's a financial issue. Sometimes it's because they simply aren't ready for college-level work.

Whatever the reason, deciding against college doesn't have to mean sacrificing a strong future. There are a number of jobs that pay well, offer good career paths and don't require a college degree. Many skilled trades -- for which your son seems to have an aptitude -- provide apprenticeships and on-the-job training. The military is also a noble endeavor.

If you and your son decide higher education is the right path, it's worth taking the time to find a school that best fits his interests and goals. And be sure to compare tuition costs. Just because a college costs twice as much doesn't mean it offers an education that's twice as valuable.

Whatever path your son chooses, remind him of this: What employers look for most are candidates who are disciplined, reliable and of good character. Those are qualities that will help create a solid future regardless of whether your child goes to college or not.

Q: What should I do about my boyfriend's "party friends"? He's a great guy, but he insists on hanging out with these guys despite their disgusting behavior. Although he doesn't participate in their "extra-curricular activities," I still feel anxious whenever he's with them.

Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: This is a common scenario for many women, and there are a couple of ways to look at the situation. A great deal depends on an honest assessment of your boyfriend's character. There are occasions when a man will engage in morally mismatched friendships in order to provide a positive example and influence. That's a tough assignment, and you need to observe and confirm over a long period of time that your boyfriend is indeed a man of strong and noble character before moving toward a serious relationship.

But if you have any doubts on that score (and your anxious feelings suggest maybe you do), it's important to ask yourself why you're involved with this guy. Are you hoping to change him into someone better? If so, that's a losing proposition. As we say in psychology, "the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior."

Some serious self-examination might help you sort out your feelings. Many women wind up with guys who are bad for them because of their own past family experiences. It's a pattern I've seen played out repeatedly. Was your father a mature man of character, who took his responsibilities seriously and treated your mother with respect? Did you have a positive relationship with your dad? Did he encourage you and affirm you as a child?

If not, you may be unconsciously drawn to men whose attitudes and behavior repeat the less-than-ideal conditions of your childhood. Our licensed counselors would be happy to listen and help guide you through these questions and any other concerns you may have. Don't hesitate to call them at 855-771-4537 for a free consultation.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

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Q: My 7-year-old son came home teary-eyed after watching a children's movie at a friend's house. Apparently one of the characters was constantly teased and mistreated by the other kids in the film. It upset my son for the rest of the day. Is this level and display of emotion something I should be concerned about?

Jim: Perhaps my own experience can be of some value here. My mom died when I was 9. I still remember what people told me over and over the day of her funeral. They said, "Be a big boy, and don't cry." I'm sure they meant well, but comments like that send a skewed message to young boys. It teaches them that real men don't show emotion -- that they're all strength, but no heart.

In my case, I wanted to be strong for my mom. And according to the adult voices around me, that meant I wasn't allowed to shed a tear. So I went through the whole funeral fighting and suppressing my emotions. I remember looking into my mom's casket and thinking, "I gotta stay strong and be a man."

Not only is that a heavy burden for a young child to bear, it communicates the wrong idea about what a real man looks and acts like. Strength is without a doubt a crucial aspect of masculinity. It's courage, integrity and character. It's part of what makes men good husbands and fathers.

But being a strong man doesn't mean guys should be unfeeling, analytical machines. Our wives and children also need us to be able to feel. That means not only expressing our emotions freely and appropriately, but being sensitive to theirs as well.

Authentic masculinity isn't a choice between strength or tenderness. It's about strength and tenderness -- and as a parent, I'd encourage you to help your son cultivate both.

Q: When should I take the car keys away from my aging father? His senses aren't as sharp as they used to be, and the older he gets, the more responsible I feel to protect his safety.

Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: You're in a delicate spot. Not only does it feel awkward to assume the unnatural role of parenting your dad, but this situation poses a potentially devastating loss for him. After all, most of us, seniors included, associate driving with mobility, freedom and human contact.

Before jumping to worst-case scenarios, consider whether your dad's driving is affected by a short-term emotional disturbance such as a significant life change or stressful circumstance. If so, simply suggest that he let someone else do the driving until things settle down.

You should also make sure your dad receives regular medical attention to discuss hearing and vision, medications and their potential side effects, possible chronic diseases, and any physical and cognitive impairments. In some cases, deterioration in these areas can be compensated for with treatment, modifications and education.

But if it's clear that the time has come to suspend your dad's driving privileges, do some research before broaching the subject. Check into the services of local agencies. Gather information on public transportation he might use, and be prepared to ride along till he feels comfortable.

When the moment of truth arrives, talk to your father respectfully about his options. Introduce the subject gently and give him every opportunity to turn over the keys on his own.

If that doesn't work, you may have to play the bad cop -- or enlist the help of your dad's doctor for the role. Your dad may protest and be angry, but you are responsible for ensuring his safety -- and that of others on the road. Remember: The most loving action isn't always the easiest.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

INTERNATIONAL COPYRIGHT SECURED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.