Q: Our teenage son is extremely intelligent. The problem is he only wants to play video games all day and night when he's home. It's a struggle to get him involved in any kind of physical activity or even just to read a book. How can I encourage him to do other things without completely taking his video games away?

Jim: You're not alone. A study by the Kaiser Family Foundation revealed that kids aged 8 to 18 now spend more than 7 1/2 hours every day using electronic gadgets, including game consoles!

I'd suggest it's time to go beyond "encouraging him to do other things," and actually set some limits. Sit down with him and explain your concerns in clear language. Tell him you feel things have gotten out of hand and that you're going to start limiting the amount of time he spends gaming.

Point out that it's important to live a balanced life that includes interests outside of video games -- things like reading, spending time with friends, playing sports or enjoying the outdoors. Make it clear that you won't allow any video games until homework and chores are complete.

Then, be sure to follow through! Don't shrink in the face of whining and complaining. At worst, you might need to get rid of the game console for a time. Most parents who stay strong in this battle find that their teens will eventually discover that there's more to life than pixels on a screen.

We've implemented this plan with our own two boys, and have also used an "earn to play" system. Both approaches have worked really well for us.

Q: Do you have any advice for how I can get my husband to talk with me? He has plenty to say around his friends, but I can't get more than seven words out of him.

Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: Have you heard of the horse whisperer, Nicholas Evans? Well, I'm going to make you a "husband whisperer" by helping you decode the mysteries of male communication. Here are some tips that should help encourage him to open up:

-- Evaluate your expectations: Generally, women communicate to connect relationally, while guys are wired to give advice and troubleshoot. Understanding your different styles can defuse conflict and enhance communication.

-- Learn his communication pattern: How does he engage others, and what things are discussed? When is he most attentive and receptive to conversation?

-- Use conversational foreplay: Women can usually share their feelings more quickly than men. If you want a deep conversation, ask some "warm-up" questions first.

-- Timing: Most guys don't want to discuss their day right after work, when there's "chaos," when they're tired and hungry, or watching a sporting event. We're sometimes more receptive to conversation when tied to an activity like walking or driving.

-- Don't multitask: Keep it simple for us -- one thing or topic at a time.

-- Offer him a "diet story." Men process information differently than ladies. Trimming away some of the details or words will keep him engaged.

-- Soften your approach: Guys are highly sensitive to criticism, disrespect or failure, and a harsh start-up emotionally shuts us down. Kicking off a discussion with a gentle voice, relaxed body language and kind words and facial expressions will keep us in the game.

-- Accept "fine" as a reasonable answer: No matter the language or culture, women have a universal distaste for this word. But men tend to communicate factually with less emotion and description. So for us, "fine" means perfectly fine.

-- Be direct in asking for what you want: Women can usually pick up subtle messages, but hints don't work well for us.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: I feel like I've "run my course" at work. I'm considering changing careers, but I'm already 45. Should I just ride it out in my current job and wait for retirement?

Jim: More and more, choosing a career is not a onetime event. It's a series of decisions we make as we progress through different stages of life. A career path may change several times based on age, family size, maturity and so on. So there's no right or wrong answer here. Just keep in mind that determining your career path requires a healthy amount of wisdom, reflection and prayer, as well as the support of your family.

If you do decide to change careers, here are some important things to keep in mind, courtesy of Crown Financial Ministries:

-- Don't always choose the first or easiest job you can find. The goal should be to move into areas in which you're using your strongest talents.

-- Don't pick a job based solely on salary. Making bigger money won't be worth it if you don't like the work.

-- Avoid choosing a job simply because the title sounds impressive. Doing what you're good at and what you enjoy is far more important than what appears on your business card.

-- Don't select a job just because you have the minimum ability to do it. There may be a lot of jobs that you can do, but that doesn't mean they're the best options available. Make sure the career you choose is the right combination of challenging and fulfilling.

Q: I love my daughters, but they're constantly fighting. My mother says I should intervene, but my husband thinks sibling rivalry is normal for kids their age. Should I be worried about this?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Family Ministries: I have three daughters of my own, so I appreciate the challenges you're experiencing! Sibling rivalry is normal and extremely common, but that doesn't mean that it should be tolerated. If carried to extremes, it can be very harmful, especially if there is constant anger, bitterness and mutual disrespect. My wife and I remind our girls regularly that they are setting the foundation for their relationships as adults. How close they'll be in the future -- not just today -- is at stake.

Consider holding a family conference, a quiet evening when everyone is in a good mood. Tell your daughters that you're concerned about their disrespectful treatment of each other and that you expect to see some changes made. Make it clear that you're going to be implementing some new household rules and that there will be consequences when those rules are broken.

The expectations should be clear, and the consequences immediate, consistent and powerful. For example, if your daughters receive an allowance, tell them that you'll be deducting a dollar a week for every violation of the new "respect policy." You could also take away favorite toys, activities or privileges for a period of time. Be sure to choose things that really matter to your girls, such as smartphone or social media access for a preteen or adolescent, or biking, playing with dolls or spending time with friends for a younger child.

Write out your new rules and consequences in the form of a contract. Have your daughters sign it and post it on the refrigerator. Since it's important to emphasize positive as well as negative consequences, you might want to include an "earn it back" clause, whereby the girls can regain privileges by treating each other appropriately for a predetermined period of time. Once the plan is in place, stick to your guns and be diligent to administer the agreed-upon consequences consistently.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: Would you recommend adopting a child from another country or a different ethnic group? My spouse and I are seriously interested in helping a youngster who needs a home, but we're unsure about the potential risks and challenges of interracial or intercultural adoption.

Jim: Let me applaud you for your willingness to bring a needy child into your home. As you may know, Focus on the Family's Adoption and Orphan Care Initiative was developed to raise awareness about the plight of orphans and to urge people to become involved. With 100,000 children waiting to be adopted here in the United States and more than 150 million orphans worldwide, it's clear that there's an opportunity to make a life-changing difference in these precious lives.

As one who was orphaned at a young age, I would wholeheartedly support and encourage families to welcome any child awaiting adoption with open arms, regardless of his or her nationality or ethnic origin. It's important, however, for everyone to be aware of and prepared for relational dynamics that might potentially have an impact. For example, if someone in the neighborhood, or perhaps an extended family member, harbors racial prejudice and could possibly display those attitudes in front of the child, the prospective parents need to be prepared to deal with the situation appropriately.

In addition, parents should take intentional steps to become educated about and culturally sensitive to their child's ethnicity.

Although it's difficult to address this topic comprehensively in this context, you may be interested to know that our staff has devoted an entire chapter to interracial adoption in a book we've prepared that you might find helpful: "Handbook on Thriving as an Adoptive Family: Real-Life Solutions to Common Challenges." You can order a copy from our online store (family.christianbook.com), or by calling us at 855-771-HELP (4357).

Q: Our family has high standards when it comes to our movie choices. But how do we handle movies that kids often watch at slumber parties?

Bob Waliszewski, Director, Plugged In: Good question. You're smart to assume that overnighters will involve at least one film before kids actually get to the "slumber" part of the party.

Here's what I'd recommend: Call the parents of the child hosting the event. Explain that because of the influential nature of motion pictures, your family is very intentional about consuming films that have a positive impact, and because of this, you'd like a heads-up on what movies, if any, are being planned for the night. They may appreciate the inquiry because many parents have boundaries for their own kids. If the film being showcased presents concerns, politely explain why and offer to send some alternative movies with your child. Should you experience or sense a lack of support, you may need to determine whether or not your child should attend the gathering, or if he or she is trustworthy and courageous enough to ask to be excused while others are watching.

One last thing: Become the "go-to" house for your kids' activities -- slumber parties and all other fun things -- as much as possible. Instead of watching movies (which takes no creativity whatsoever), help your kids plan a "better than watching a movie" slumber party.

Maybe you can play a game of broom soccer or ultimate Frisbee at a park nearby. A scavenger hunt that involves video-recording certain activities (e.g., videotape a dog that responds to the command, "Bang!" by rolling over and playing dead) is always a winner with kids. Or if there's talent within the group, have the kids script and shoot a melodrama using their phones, which they can then enjoy watching together afterward.

Consider looking online for other kid-safe ideas.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.