Q: As first-time parents, we've been overwhelmed by all the advice we've received from people. Though they are well-meaning, I feel like telling them to mind their own business. Is that wrong?

Jim: It wasn't long ago that I was asking this same question. What I eventually learned is that most veteran parents who share their hard-won wisdom are simply trying to help. They've already raised their own kids, and don't see why you shouldn't benefit from the invaluable knowledge they've acquired through trial and error. So try to be gracious when they offer their tips and helpful hints. For the most part, they're acting out of genuine concern and are on your side.

Of course, there are some whose motives are different -- individuals who take pleasure in boosting their own sense of superiority by pointing out your mistakes and telling you the "right way" to parent your child. Dealing with these folks is frustrating.

When responding to them, you might try saying something like this: "Thank you so much for your helpful advice. We will certainly consider it." This phrase can be particularly useful if the unwanted counsel is coming from a close relative such as a parent or an in-law. Remember to say it with a smile.

Another technique is to thank them and let them know that you are basing your parenting methods on your moral values, along with the advice of respected child-development experts. One place to find that expert advice is Focus on the Family's "Complete Guide to Baby and Child Care," an extensive volume written by 26 family physicians and pediatricians associated with our Physicians Resource Council. You can order a copy by giving us a call at 1-800-A-FAMILY or by visiting our online store (focusonthefamily.com).

Q: I'm extremely frustrated with the growing toxicity of the entertainment media, but short of moving to the Sahara Desert, I can't completely shield my children from all of it. What should I do?

Bob Waliszewski, director of Plugged In: The answer to this increasingly common dilemma lies in teaching them discernment -- not imposing isolation. By taking this approach, you'll be teaching your kids to think for themselves and equipping them to make smart choices long after they've left your nest. These ideas may be of help:

Establish guidelines for your family. Although entertainment decisions can fall into a bit of a gray area, establish a family standard for making media decisions. Our family did so -- not because we needed more rules, but because we didn't want to leave the concept of making wise choices to mere chance.

Rely on credible sources for entertainment review. Check out potential media choices before your kids make them. Focus on the Family's Plugged In Online (www.pluggedin.com) provides balanced, trustworthy reviews of what's hot in the media.

Model wise choices. One of the surest ways to derail your child's media discernment is to behave hypocritically. Your words won't be effective if you say one thing and do another.

When you can't tune it out, try teaching. When your family encounters offensive media content, turn the incident into a "teachable moment." Discuss what's wrong with the message it conveys and use the opportunity to reinforce the principles of discernment.

Keep open communication lines. Talk often about the media with your kids. When you have to say "no" to certain entertainment, help them find positive alternatives. Adopt a policy of accountability that allows all family members to read each other's texts, tweets, social media posts, emails, web history, etc. Intentionality is the best way to turn your home into a place where good habits of media discernment are caught as well as taught.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: We have three children, and we are looking at any advice you can give us on how we should do money allowances in our household.

Jim: Some parents believe in paying a weekly allowance, and some pay their kids for individual chores. Others don't pay anything, opting instead to give their children money for purchases based on their overall attitude and helpfulness. There's no one-size-fits-all approach.

Whatever system you adopt, it's important to remember that one of your major goals is to prepare your children to live in the "real world" -- the world of work, taxes, charitable giving and investments. In that world, nobody is going to pay them for making their beds or taking out the trash. Instead, they'll be paid for things like managing a group of employees, tuning up somebody's car or selling a pair of shoes to a demanding customer.

With that in mind, we would suggest that kids perform certain tasks around the house simply because they are part of the family. This might include taking care of their own rooms, picking up their toys, helping prepare meals, washing their own clothes and, yes, even taking out the trash.

On the other hand, you might pay your kids for chores that demand more time and energy -- contributions to the life of the household that go beyond the call of duty. This might include mowing the lawn, washing the car or, in the case of a responsible teenager, baby-sitting younger siblings for an entire Saturday afternoon.

Whether it's a regular responsibility or a chore that earns a "paycheck," it's important to communicate clearly what you're looking for in terms of the time frame and the level of quality you expect.

Q: What do you do when your spouse is unwilling to compromise or discuss issues that you don't agree on in your marriage?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President of Family Ministries: The key is to dig down below the surface issue to what is actually driving both spouses' feelings of hurt. Instead of getting stuck arguing about a specific issue (money, sex, kids, work, etc.), or what each partner is doing wrong, use the opportunity to discuss what is really going on deep inside of you.

What drives hurt and frustration in marriage? Buttons. Whenever someone says something that hurts you or makes you mad, it pushes your buttons. Common buttons include feeling rejected, abandoned, helpless, inadequate, unloved, worthless or unimportant. All of these buttons are ultimately rooted in fear. When someone pushes your fear button, you tend to react with unhealthy words or actions calculated to motivate the other person to change and give you what you want. For example, if you fear being a failure, you want to feel successful. If you fear being rejected, you desire to feel accepted. Most of us use unhealthy reactions to deal with our fear, and, as a result, we sabotage our relationships.

The key to breaking this cycle is for you and your spouse to first identify your buttons, and then your reactions. Remember, you can either talk about the surface issue, arguing about what the other person does that hurts or frustrates you, or you can talk about what is really driving your hurt and frustration -- your buttons. Don't be afraid to ask an outside party for help with this process, if necessary. Focus on the Family can offer you a free counseling session by phone and also put you in touch with a qualified counselor in your area.

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.

Q: Our son is heading off for his first year at college and wants to pledge to a fraternity. Is this a good idea for a freshman? I don't know much about fraternities.

Jim: The answer to this question depends on a number of factors.

Not every fraternity resembles "Animal House." While some may be considered almost entirely social in nature, others seek to bring together students who share similar interests or who are involved in the same academic disciplines. There are service-oriented fraternities, ethnically and linguistically based fraternities, and even some fraternities whose purpose is primarily religious or spiritual.

That being the case, it's important for you to discern what type of fraternity your son is hoping to join. Unfortunately, many do have a reputation for wild behavior and crazy parties. That's not to mention the peer-group power they wield. It can have a huge impact on an impressionable freshman living away from home for the first time in his life. And some campuses are known for these types of frat houses more than others. Is the atmosphere on campus studious or "party like"? Is the fraternity in question spiritual, academic or purely social in purpose? If you don't know, sit down with your son and find out.

It's also critical that you consider your son's character. Is he firmly grounded in his beliefs? Does he know his own mind, or is he easily influenced by others? If you feel that he lacks the maturity to handle a fraternity at this point, encourage him to look for loyal companions elsewhere by pointing him toward other academic and social groups on campus.

Q: My teenage daughter has battled boredom and wasted a lot of time during summer break. What can I do to change that next year?

Bob Waliszewski, director of Plugged In: It's difficult to move from a schedule of structured six- to 10-hour days to total free time. And a bored teen will be unhappy and more likely to gravitate toward trouble. But counselors Tim Geare and Tim Sanford suggest that it's possible to help structure your daughter's life over the summer months and still have her feel ownership and excitement.

Geare and Sanford recommend that parents decide the overall priorities and tone of the summer. Will every day begin at noon or dawn? Will there be a family vacation? Is there a financial goal for your teen? Is camp or a mission trip an option? How do siblings' needs fit into the picture? How about summer school? Are there sports she could further develop? And most importantly, are there character qualities lacking in her life? Develop a vision for what you feel is in your daughter's best interest. Consider her gifts, skills and interests, and develop options that will engage her imagination.

Too many bored teens gravitate toward the TV or video game controller. While I don't think these things should be taboo, I do recommend that your daughter "earn" the privilege: Every hour of reading a great book translates into 30 minutes of screen time.

For older teens, employment is a key issue, but make sure any job supports the overall goals of the summer. If camp or a family trip is important, don't let a job confound those priorities. If age or circumstances eliminate paid employment, consider volunteer service.

At this point, you've got one month left this year and nine or 10 months before summer vacation rolls around again. Your inspiration and determination to make summer fun and productive may be the jump-start your daughter needs. Kudos to you for thinking about this important period in her life so far in advance!

Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at www.jimdalyblog.com or at www.facebook.com/DalyFocus.